The Parenting Project – Introduction

The Parenting Project – Introduction October 28, 2012

by Calulu

A while back Libby Anne from Love, Joy Feminism had a inspired idea to run a series on her blog called Raised Quiverfull. The way it worked if you’re not familiar with it was that she posted a list of questions asking readers to write in and share what life was like being raised in a Quiverfull Patriarchy Fundamentalist home. An impressive array of folks responded to her multi part questionnaire and it made for some of the most revealing and interesting reading on the subject of Quiverfull.

Then Sierra came up with the theme of The Sexuality Project on her blog the phoenix and olive branch. Open to anyone that wished to participate that had been involved with the world of fundamental churches. The Sexuality Project was also a fascinating read, a peek into the formation of critical ideas of sexuality and religion.

Both series are excellent and eventually we’ll be publishing both in their entirety.

Lately we’ve had a number of writers take on the subject of parenting starting with Latebloomer of Past Tense Present Progressive critiquing Reb Bradley’s book Child Care Tips. I wrote about my rejection as a baby Biblical Patriarchy QF Christian of the book To Train Up A Child by Michael and Debi Pearl. Kristen Rosser of Wordgazer’s Words finished it up with wise words on parenting.

Since parenting is one of the most important things we can do as humans because it not only affects our family but it affects society at large it’s important we think about it, discuss it with others, exchange ideas, goals.

I’d like to do a series on Parenting, the parenting you received, how you parent and what changes you’ve experienced through the years.  I’d love it if you, dear reader, would consider participating!  Share as much or as little as you’d like. Answering all questions is optional, just answer to whatever your comfort level is.

The questions will be posted over the course of the next week and the answers are due by Thanksgiving Day, Thursday November 22nd.  You can them either pasted into your email or as a text file, whatever is easier for you. Email them to me at We will start posting them up here at NLQ shortly thereafter.

Introduction Questions

1.  Introduce yourself, sharing as much or little as you like.

2.  What religious influences were you raised in?

3.  Do you have children and what ages are they?

The next batch of questions will be concerning childhood and the parenting style used.

Thanks for participating!

Comments open below

Read everything by Calulu!

The Spiritual Abuse Survivor Blogs Network

NLQ Recommended Reading …

Breaking Their Will: Shedding Light on Religious Child Maltreatment‘ by Janet Heimlich

Quivering Daughters‘ by Hillary McFarland

Quiverfull: Inside the Christian Patriarchy Movement‘ by Kathryn Joyce


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  • The_L

    My family will probably recognize me immediately if they ever read this, but that’s unlikely. Most people don’t know my background because I’m so ashamed of it, so it should be safe enough to post this here. I wouldn’t dare put it on my regular blog because I don’t feel safe doing so.

    1. I’m a college professor in Florida. I’m 27 and still working out issues from a not-quite-Christian-patriarchy-but-darn-close upbringing. I find this blog therapeutic, because the emotional experiences shared by the regular posters are so eerily familiar. It helps to know you’re not alone.

    2. I was raised (very conservative) Catholic, in southern Alabama, by parents who met late in life. My father behaved (and still does) as if absolutely no social norms had changed one iota since the early 60’s. We went to Mass and CCD/Sunday School every single week, no exceptions. My parents sent me to the lone private school in the area, which was run by the local Church of God, because Mom, as a teacher, couldn’t stand the ineptitude of the AL Board of Education. She taught in public schools until she got flak for actually enforcing the new No-Pass-No-Play rules by giving failing students exactly the grades they earned and no more. Since my brother was about due to start kindergarten at that point, she started teaching the upper levels at our school, so that we’d get 50% off tuition and could both afford to go.

    My upbringing was such that I could not even imagine any aspect of life that wasn’t saturated with Jesus-speak. References to God popped up absolutely everywhere and were considered normal–even in a math lecture. We were taught lots of Christian songs in school–“Jesus Loves Me,” “Sermon in Shoes,” “Father Abraham,” “Awesome God” (complete with hand movements). I didn’t understand why Mom wouldn’t let me make comments about how obviously fake evolution was, or sing that one song about how people who worshipped other gods did so because they had demons in them. However, my parents encouraged my early and rather vehement opposition to abortion and euthanasia without questioning its source, since they agreed with it.

    I took everything I was told at face value, because it didn’t make sense to me for parents, teachers, and priests to lie to me. I believed that my parents must agree with everything my teachers said, because they were paying money for me to go to my school (I didn’t know how much, but it sounded like probably a lot), and they wouldn’t pay money for their kids to be lied to all day.

    3. I don’t have children yet, but I do want them and always have. I kinda want to get married first, though. 🙂 I’m currently dating a wonderful Jewish man (my parents don’t know he’s Jewish), and am content with where my life is right now. Marriage and children will come in their own time.