![\"JoeSands-1\"](\"https:\/\/wp-media.patheos.com\/blogs\/sites\/188\/2017\/01\/JoeSands-1-1.jpg\")
<\/a>by Joe Sand cross posted from his blog Incongruous Circumspection<\/a><\/strong><\/em><\/p>\nThis post is going to be a bit different from what I have done in the past.\u00a0 I\u2019m going to write my thoughts, and then open it up to my readers to give their input.\u00a0 Please don\u2019t hesitate to chime in, even if you disagree with what I have to say.\u00a0 I want all different perspectives.\u00a0 Thanks in advance!<\/p>\n
*****<\/p>\n
The Chauvinistic Authority Doctrine (CAD) requires a father to monitor and control their children\u2019s every movement and even their every thought.\u00a0 If their nose hairs so much as twitch out of line, this doctrine states that there is rebellion in the son\u2019s or daughter\u2019s soul.\u00a0 This also goes for that man\u2019s wife. \u00a0\u00a0Nothing does, nor should it, escape his careful and searching eye.\u00a0 In the isolated instance that something does, that individual or inanimate object must come clean immediately in order to continue in the good graces of the god man.<\/p>\n
Sometimes, a CAD man will spy on his young adult and adult \u201cchildren\u201d through hacking into social media that they use.\u00a0 By spying, we are not talking about viewing their profiles and posts.\u00a0 Rather, it is the act of hacking into their accounts and viewing their private chats and messages.<\/p>\n
Frankly, unless the parent has initially told the child that they will be doing this, I don\u2019t know that I would EVER condone this practice.\u00a0\u00a0 That is none of the parent\u2019s business.\u00a0 This is an adult we\u2019re talking about here \u2013 the parent\u2019s peer.\u00a0 Would the parent\u2019s co-workers appreciate it if it was discovered that he was hacking into whatever electronic medium they were using to communicate with others, just to keep tabs on them, having not been informed of this potentiality in the Employee Handbook?\u00a0 If it WAS in the Handbook, go to town!<\/p>\n
But, let\u2019s look at the child psychology that is at play here and then we\u2019ll check in on the parent\u2019s, later on.<\/p>\n
If I was a teen or young adult, living in a CAD dad\u2019s house (or even not living there\u2026) and was informed that I was going to be hacked or spied on, every second of every day, it would take a Forrest Gump-like psyche to actually leave electronic tracks that could incriminate me ANYWHERE on the cyberwaves.\u00a0 And I mean ANYWHERE!\u00a0 I would do my darndest to hide anything and everything from my overbearing old man.\u00a0 If he ever caught up with me, I would deny, deny, deny.\u00a0 He wouldn\u2019t get a shred of truth out of me.\u00a0 And, if he did happen to beat or squeeze it forth (sadly, a CAD adherer will do this to their \u201cchildren\u201d of any age\u2026I know\u2026I\u2019m living proof), I would learn my lesson so well that it would take Houdini and six of his relatives to even catch a scent of what I was continuing to cook.\u00a0 It\u2019s that simple.<\/p>\n
Now, here is my take on the parent.\u00a0 CAD dad, if you have to hack into your adult children\u2019s social media to keep your hyper-religious, uber-obligatory tabs on them, you\u2019ve failed buddy.\u00a0 Big time!\u00a0 If you\u2019re adult children need your guiding hand at that level here\u2019s a simple news flash (I\u2019ll put it in caps so it\u2019s easier for you to read):<\/p>\n
THEY WILL NOT MAKE IT AS ADULTS NOW OR EVER!!!<\/strong><\/p>\n How do I know this?\u00a0 Well, it\u2019s quite simple, actually.\u00a0 If you have held your children\u2019s hands throughout their life so much so that they cannot get breakfast on their own without your permission, where they cannot so much as even take a piss without your say-so, where they can\u2019t even go out on the town for a night without worrying about what you are thinking WHILE they party and what you will think WHEN they return, you\u2019ve failed to rear forward thinking, self-sufficient, successful offspring.\u00a0 In short, you lost.\u00a0 Get over it.<\/p>\n But there\u2019s more at stake here.\u00a0 Especially for adult children \u2013 Why, as a parent, do we want them to be protected from everything?\u00a0 As an adult who has been on your own for years, you don\u2019t have someone holding your hand, every step of the way, shielding you from impending \u2013 many times, imagined \u2013 danger.\u00a0 Why can\u2019t a CAD parent allow his teen, young adult, and adult children to fail?\u00a0 To fall?\u00a0 To hit rock bottom?\u00a0 To get Crispy Creamed?<\/p>\n The fact is, if negative things DO happen to them, the last thing they will do is come crawling home to dear old dad for solace because, after all, they failed him.\u00a0 If they had only done what he told them to do at every point in their lives, nothing bad would have happened to them.\u00a0 Thus, the bad thing that caused them to fail was only due to not allowing the guiding hand to do all the work.\u00a0 What\u2019s worse, what if the bad thing happened WHILE the guiding hand was doing all the work?\u00a0 Who to go to then?<\/p>\n I want to be waiting to lick the wounds of my children if they ever come crawling back home.\u00a0 I want them to want <\/em>to come to me for my advice.\u00a0 Not out of expectation, but because I\u2019m an insecure loser of a father and I am easily flattered.\u00a0 They don\u2019t even need to need it.\u00a0 Just fake it once in a while.\u00a0 But most importantly, I want to have taught them all the foundational lessons that I think they\u2019ll need when they jump from the nest and fly away \u2013 hoping beyond all hope, that they won\u2019t be as much a screw-up as their dear old daddy was.<\/p>\n With all that desire, more than likely, they\u2019ll end up asking their mommy instead.<\/p>\n *****<\/p>\n So, what do you think?\u00a0 Did I miss something?\u00a0 Am I way off base?<\/p>\n John Piper Wants to go to Prison<\/a><\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n ~~~~~~~~~~~~<\/p>\n I am a 30 something husband of one and father of 6 dynamic and loud children. My wife and I are still madly in love \u2013 at least in my view. My world is exciting, tense, and full of life. I love to write and hope to one day, do it full time. \u2013 Incongruous Circumspection<\/a><\/p>\n Stay in touch! Like No Longer Quivering on Facebook:<\/em><\/p>\n No Longer Quivering<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n If this is your first time visiting NLQ please read our Welcome page<\/a> and our Comment Policy<\/a>!<\/strong><\/p>\n Copyright notice: If you use any content from NLQ, including any of our research or Quoting Quiverfull quotes, please give us credit and a link back to this site. All original content is owned by No Longer Quivering and Patheos.com<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n Read our hate mail at Jerks 4 Jesus<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n Contact NLQ at SuzanneNLQ@gmail.com<\/strong><\/p>\n![\"more\"](\"https:\/\/wp-media.patheos.com\/blogs\/sites\/188\/2017\/01\/more-10.jpg\")
<\/a>Read more by Joe Sand:<\/em><\/p>\n
\nComments open below<\/strong><\/span><\/h2>\n
NLQ Recommended Reading \u2026<\/strong><\/h1>\n
Quiverfull: Inside the Christian Patriarchy Movement<\/a> by Kathryn Joyce<\/strong><\/h4>\n
13:24 \u2013 A Story of Faith and Obsession<\/a> by M Dolon Hickmon<\/strong><\/h4>\n