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{"id":4550,"date":"2015-09-28T10:05:02","date_gmt":"2015-09-28T16:05:02","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/admin.patheos.com\/blogs\/paperbacktheology\/?p=4550"},"modified":"2015-09-28T10:05:02","modified_gmt":"2015-09-28T16:05:02","slug":"my-iphone-has-magic-powers-monday-morning-confessional","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/paperbacktheology\/2015\/09\/my-iphone-has-magic-powers-monday-morning-confessional.html","title":{"rendered":"My iPhone Has Magic Powers: Monday Morning Confessional"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

$\"phone.001\"$ <\/a>I confess that a few weeks ago I\u00a0was leaving work at the end of the day, and as I was backing out of my parking space I got an alert on my iPhone. It said, \u201cYou are twelve\u00a0minutes from home.\u201d I had never received a\u00a0message of this kind before. My first thought was, who is this & how\u00a0the heck did they know I\u2019m going home right now? It was a little freaky. My next thought was, eleven minutes my arse\u2026\u00a0I\u2019ll be home in seven<\/em>.<\/p>\n

It took me\u00a0eleven minutes on the dot. My iPhone has magic powers.<\/p>\n

The next morning I got in my car and this message popped up telling me I was\u00a0eleven minutes from 515 S. Ridgeview, the address of the church office. I was in fact going to the office. Impressive, and it took me exactly eleven minutes. Okay, the phone is generating this stuff, but how? It\u2019s not from my calendar, and it only pops up at random times\u2013usually when I am in fact headed to home or the office. Is this thing learning my patterns? I know I could Google it and figure out what the function is, but I\u2019m enjoying the mystery.<\/p>\n

This magical function doesn\u2019t always work perfectly. Every single Sunday morning my alarm goes off at 5:20. I pack everything up the night before so I can walk out the door before 5:30. This is perhaps my most consistent pattern. But, the iPhone never anticipates that trip. I keep waiting, because at that time of day the traffic lights change for me instantly. I can sometimes make the trip in less than five minutes. This morning it popped up and told me that I was eleven minutes from work. Ha! Suck it. I\u2019m going to a coffeeshop this morning\u2026 maybe I am<\/em> smarter than my phone.<\/p>\n

Here\u2019s the thing; this random message started me wondering\u2013just how many categories of my life are there in which I\u2019m drastically overestimating my capabilities?<\/p>\n

Most of the time my iPhone tells me I\u2019m eleven or twelve minutes from work, while in my mind it\u2019s only seven minutes, maybe eight or nine when there\u2019s a lot of traffic. So the best case scenario is that I\u2019m overestimating my capabilities by 18.2%. What if I\u2019m overestimating all of my abilities<\/em> by that same percentage?<\/p>\n

Am I 18.2% less funny than I thought I was? What if I\u2019m 18.2% worse as a dad, or a pastor?\u00a0Is\u00a0my ability as a writer somewhere around\u00a018.2% lower than I thought it was? That would explain some rather disappointing\u00a0book sales numbers. You can see that\u00a0there are many places I could go with this particular neurosis. My wife and I are going to have to have a talk.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m not sure this is helpful information to have about myself. However, if the trend only applies to time, then it could be a good\u00a0number to keep in mind.\u00a0I consistently underestimate the amount of time it\u2019s going to take to get to the places I need to go. Ten minutes late is like on time for me. I\u2019ve always called this an ADHD thing, and have owned it by telling myself and others that I\u2019m always running late. Maybe I\u2019m not running late so much as I\u2019m underestimating how long it will take me to do everything I do.<\/p>\n

What would be\u00a0the impact of correcting all time estimates by 18.2%? Should I add an extra 18.2% on the time I allot to get to a lunch appointment, or write a book? If I could successfully make the change, would I get 18.2% more done in my day? Would I be 18.2% more effective? Would I be 18.2% more happy?\u00a0What if other people actually enjoy the fact that I\u2019m always ten minutes late? What if it\u2019s part of my charm\u2013assuming I have charm of course\u2013and it ends up having the opposite effect?<\/p>\n

I confess that I have no way to conclude this blog post, other than to acknowledge that it probably took around 18.2% longer to complete it than I thought it would.<\/p>\n

Ok, I made my confession. Now it\u2019s time for you to make yours\u2026<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"