{"id":93,"date":"2011-06-30T14:55:00","date_gmt":"2011-06-30T20:55:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/permissiontolive\/2011\/06\/unraveling-the-wizard\/"},"modified":"2014-10-07T16:06:11","modified_gmt":"2014-10-07T22:06:11","slug":"unraveling-the-wizard","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/permissiontolive\/2011\/06\/unraveling-the-wizard.html","title":{"rendered":"Unraveling the Wizard"},"content":{"rendered":"<!DOCTYPE html PUBLIC \"-\/\/W3C\/\/DTD HTML 4.0 Transitional\/\/EN\" \"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/TR\/REC-html40\/loose.dtd\">\n<html><head><meta http-equiv=\"content-type\" content=\"text\/html; charset=utf-8\"><meta http-equiv=\"content-type\" content=\"text\/html; charset=utf-8\"><\/head><body><p><\/p>\n<div class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both;text-align: center\"><a href=\"https:\/\/2.bp.blogspot.com\/-OsxCdbMTcWI\/TgzQiXvK-cI\/AAAAAAAAAyg\/zi3AnF4_a1A\/s1600\/wizard-ofe-oz.jpg\" class=\" decorated-link\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow\"><img border=\"0\" height=\"300px\"><\/a><\/div>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: large\">A while back<\/span> I was talking to a sister on the phone and she related this story to me. <\/p>\n<p>She was hanging out at my parent\u2019s house and Mom and our 14 year old sister had just come home from shopping. They were relating how the trip had gone well and our sister had found a nice bathing suit and then while they were in line the person behind them\u00a0offered\u00a0the use of\u00a0a 20% off coupon that they were not intending to use. Then my Mom added that God had sent the coupon because our sister had \u201cmade the right choice\u201d and picked a \u201cmodest\u201d bathing suit. <\/p>\n<p>The sister relating this story to me could not understand why she had reacted so strongly to what my Mom said. She was instantly angry, almost to the point of nausea. <em>\u201cI could see being irritated by Mom claiming that God was rewarding her for picking a modest bathing suit, but why did it make me so angry!\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: large\">It made sense to me.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>My sister and I (and all of the rest of our siblings) have been raised to believe that following God meant doing everything our parents said. We were told over and over that the only way to be happy was if we were completely obedient and submissive to the God-granted authority my Dad possessed. Dad, as the male leader of the home represented God to us, as long as we remained obedient, we were under God\u2019s care, which meant we were promised health, good marriages, happy children etc. If we rebelled and disobeyed, we were without spiritual protection, and would be unhappy and live broken lives. We would be living outside the bounds of \u201cWhat God Wanted\u201d, and therefore unable to be blessed by Him.<\/p>\n<p>I remember one time when my Dad was ranting about my \u201cselfishness\u201d and \u201claziness\u201d in <a href=\"http:\/\/ayoungmomsmusings.blogspot.com\/2011\/01\/motherhood-after-growing-up-quiverfull_12.html\" class=\" decorated-link\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow\">keeping up with the housework<\/a>, he gave me an ultimatum, asking if I wanted \u201cto serve God or yourself\u201d. I was 15, and <a href=\"http:\/\/ayoungmomsmusings.blogspot.com\/2010\/08\/never-good-enough.html\" class=\" decorated-link\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow\">wanted to please both God and my Dad<\/a>, so of course I answered \u201cGod\u201d. But curious, I then asked him what would say if I had said I wanted to serve myself. His answer was \u201cfind another place to live\u201d. If I wasn\u2019t willing to do \u201cWhat God Wanted\u201d, then I was not worthy to live in his house.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: large\">This topic came up endlessly.<\/span> If we wore a shirt without sleeves, we were displeasing God. If we listened to Christian radio, we were rebelling against God. If we didn\u2019t obey instantly and without question, we were not following God\u2019s plan. But in reality, my parents were just using \u201cGod\u201d to justify everything that they wanted. There is a big difference in saying \u201cWow, a 20% of coupon, what a gift from God!\u201d and saying \u201cGod sent me this gift because I made such and such a choice.\u201d My mom wanted my sister to dress a certain way, so she praised her for her choice in bathing suits, by claiming that God was happy about it and was sending her money to prove it.<\/p>\n<p>************************<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: large\">I\u2019ve continued to see this mentality in Christians outside of my family.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>God seems to be the proxy for emotions that no one wants to deal with. People don\u2019t want to claim the thought or feeling as their own, so they assign it to God. They want to move to a new area, so they decide that it must be \u201cWhat God Wants\u201d. They are changing careers because it is \u201cWhat God Wants\u201d. They homeschool, or send their children to private school because that is \u201cWhat God Wants\u201d. <\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: large\">Why is it so hard to just admit that it is actually what you want? <\/span><br><span style=\"font-size: large\"><br><\/span><br>A more painful aspect of this, is watching people agonize over a decision because they don\u2019t\u00a0<em>know<\/em> \u201cWhat God Wants.\u201d They love someone, but does God\u00a0<em>want<\/em> them to marry this person? They are exhausted and burnt out, but what if God\u00a0<em>wants<\/em> them to have another baby? They can\u2019t decide which college to attend, because who knows \u201cWhat God Wants\u201d?<\/p>\n<p>And the worst form of this, is when (much like my parents) someone tells\u00a0<em>another person<\/em>\u00a0\u201cWhat God Wants\u201d for\u00a0<em>their<\/em> life. This turns into \u201cGod Wants You to\u2026\u201d They can\u2019t be content just believing that God communicates his will for their lives directly to them, they have to take it one step further and insist that God tells them his will for everyone else\u2019s lives as well. <\/p>\n<p>This God talk <em>(God Wants, God told me, God\u2019s Will, God\u2019s Plan\u2026)<\/em> is all nonsense. Nobody has a direct line to God. No one knows exactly what he wants. We can read the Bible, and pray, and subscribe to churches that do their best to interpret God\u2019s will to be. <strong><em>But no one really knows\u00a0100%.<\/em><\/strong> No one is completely unbiased. <\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: large\">In the end,<\/span> we each have to make our decisions based on what is best for us in relation to our community and world, leaving everyone else to their own decisions, hoping that if there is a God, he\u2019ll be merciful despite our mistakes.<\/p>\n<div class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both;text-align: center\"><a href=\"https:\/\/3.bp.blogspot.com\/-I9iRp6-HX_w\/TgzQkfalC1I\/AAAAAAAAAyk\/4lfd15OjsbQ\/s1600\/wizard-of-oz-man-behind-the-curtain1.jpg\" class=\" decorated-link\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow\"><img border=\"0\" height=\"266px\"><\/a><\/div>\n<p>One of the final scenes from \u201cThe Wizard of OZ\u201d is a great illustration of this type of God talk. <\/p>\n<p>Dorothy has finally completed her Quest to make it to the Wizard, and she stands looking up at the impressive large face and listening to the booming voice of Oz. When suddenly, Toto starts pulling on a sheet in the corner of the room, and behind it is a little man fiddling with a control panel. \u201cOz\u201d bellows from the projection screen \u201cpay no attention to that man behind the curtain!!\u201d But of course upon further investigation, the man behind the curtain turns out to be the brain behind the \u201cWizard of Oz\u201d. Not so impressive after all, just a little guy with a projector and a microphone, trying to tell everyone else what to do.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: large\">So the next time<\/span> someone tries to tell you that they know exactly \u201cWhat God Wants\u201d for your life, and you stand there listening to the booming voice and looking at the large projection, just remember that behind the curtain,<em> it isn\u2019t God at all, it\u2019s just that person pretending to be God.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: large\">Not so scary now is it.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A while back I was talking to a sister on the phone and she related this story to me. She was hanging out at my parent\u2019s house and Mom and our 14 year old sister had just come home from shopping. They were relating how the trip had gone well and our sister had found [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1145,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[28,22,29],"tags":[63,53],"class_list":["post-93","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-abuse","category-conservative-christianity","category-god","tag-realizations","tag-spiritual-abuse"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v21.1 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Unraveling the Wizard<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"A while back I was talking to a sister on the phone and she related this story to me. 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