Kelly\u2019s Takes today are a brilliant roadmap to a trouble free summer <\/a>and I applaud and greet her for saving me the work, especially when I wasn\u2019t going to do it anyway. It\u2019s true, what with the solstice and all, that summer is finally here. And summer, of course, is when you get your act together and do all the things you avoided doing during the school year. But it\u2019s also the time to lie back and catch up on all the rest you thought you needed, which means not doing Everything. So here are seven things we\u2019ll not be doing this summer.<\/p>\nOne<\/b><\/p>\n
Not getting air conditioning.
\nI need to get this out there right away. I\u2019ve never been happier than I am now\u2026so happy. It\u2019s so nice and humid and comfortable. And because the temperature has only been gradually rising, the moaning and sobbing of the children has virtually stopped. In some profound way they seem to have accepted reality and forgotten about being sweaty and hot.<\/p>\n
It is so pleasant to feel the actual breeze blow through this perfectly constructed house, a house built by people who expected the temperature to go up and down and so placed the windows and doors in such a way that they speak to one another. The breeze blows. The sunlight flickers. It\u2019s miraculous. And best of all, when you go from the outside to the inside you are not assaulted by a wall of frigid air that sends your whole body into hideous shock.<\/p>\n
Two<\/b><\/p>\n
Not going away for a whole a month.
\nIt\u2019s not that we\u2019re not going to go away. We are. But not too far. And not for a whole block of time. I\u2019m too stressed about leaving the garden unwatered and unweeded for a whole month. And besides, I\u2019m pretty sure I\u2019m going to need lots of extra time in the service of Kon Mari. I\u2019ve only held like two of the things in my hand to ask them if they bring me joy but then two different children interrupted me and the life force of the objects was not able to communicate with me in any way so I just put them both back. I mean, I understand that this should be a \u2018special event,\u2019 something that you do only once, but I\u2019m kind of having a hard time believing that this special time will clock in a fortnight less than year. And by that time I\u2019ll be wondering if maybe I\u2019m not wasting my time.<\/p>\n
Three<\/b><\/p>\n
Not complaining anymore about anything.
\nNo child is going to complain about anything, ever again. I made an announcement and it went down really well. \u2018I want you all to stop complaining,\u2019 I said, calmly and rationally. So that should be it. I look forward to a completely complaint free summer. It\u2019s going to be awesome.<\/p>\n
Four<\/b><\/p>\n
Not \u2018catching up on school.\u2019
\nEvery summer I think to myself, \u2018we\u2019ll just finish one or two books up, or get a head start.\u2019 But, you know what, not this year. Not going to delude myself. I\u2019ve packed all the books away and I\u2019m just not going to worry about it. We\u2019ll pick up where we left off sometime in late August. It\u2019ll be fine.<\/p>\n
Five<\/b><\/p>\n
Not cleaning all the time.
\nWhen I told the children not to complain anymore ever again I also told them to be sure and pick up after themselves so that we could live decently and in order, not beating our way past piles of candy wrappers and sadness. I\u2019m excited about having a picked up house all summer. It\u2019s so great how you can just say something like that, just tell a child what to do, and they just do it. I love that. It\u2019s going to be so great.<\/p>\n
Six<\/b><\/p>\n
Not wasting all our time online.
\nNot that we do this anyway. Except for me. I mean, I spend too much time on Facebook and not enough time reading actual books. So, by the sheer power of my awesome will, with the same cheerfulness of spirit that is definitely keeping all the children from ever complaining about anything ever again, I\u2019m just going to Read Moar Books. It\u2019s going to be great. I made a big stack of the books I plan to easily read all summer. In between holding objects in my hand and letting their essence speak to me, without interruption from any grubby child, you\u2019ll find me lying back in my chair, reading books and becoming clever and interesting. It\u2019s going to be great. It\u2019s going to be so so great.<\/p>\n
Seven<\/b><\/p>\n
And finally, this summer, I\u2019m not going to turn down the chance to be queen of the world. Because there\u2019s as much chance of that invitation arriving on my clean and uncluttered desk as there is of me getting through the summer complaint free, with a kon mari\u2019d house, having read all the books, and Matt not having ruined everything by buying a bunch of life destroying air conditioners. It\u2019s going to be so great.<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Kelly\u2019s Takes today are a brilliant roadmap to a trouble free summer and I applaud and greet her for saving me the work, especially when I wasn\u2019t going to do it anyway. It\u2019s true, what with the solstice and all, that summer is finally here. And summer, of course, is when you get your act […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2373,"featured_media":6361,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[11,15],"tags":[26,45,47,62],"class_list":["post-6360","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-in-conversation-with-children","category-life-going-on","tag-binghamton","tag-jens-7-quick-takes","tag-just-plain-sarcastic","tag-the-weather"],"yoast_head":"\n
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<\/a><\/p>\n