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{"id":475,"date":"2015-01-22T12:55:23","date_gmt":"2015-01-22T16:55:23","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/admin.patheos.com\/blogs\/rebariley\/?p=475"},"modified":"2015-01-22T12:55:23","modified_gmt":"2015-01-22T16:55:23","slug":"is-god-aloof","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/rebariley\/2015\/01\/is-god-aloof\/","title":{"rendered":"Is God Aloof?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

\u201cWhat are we to do with a God who hides?\u201d<\/p>\n

This is the question Tony Kriz asks in his book <\/a>Aloof<\/a>, <\/em>and I must share that my immediate and visceral reaction to the question was:<\/p>\n

Wait, God doesn\u2019t<\/em> hide. Not in my life.<\/p>\n

Not anymore.<\/p>\n

The God I use to know, pre-Post-Traumatic Church Syndrome, that God was absent all the time. I was constantly playing cosmic hide \u2018n seek with a companion who had the power of invisibility. (Not a fair game, by the way.)<\/p>\n

Our church was charismatic, which basically means that is you weren\u2019t feeling God\u2014in your body, in your emotions, in your mind\u2014there was something wrong with YOU. I mean, if God was really touching your heart in worship, you\u2019d better believe your eyes would be watering. As a result, I was constantly on the lookout for that ooey-gooey Jesus who would be my boyfriend\/best friend, waiting for him to \u201cPick me! Pick me!\u201d<\/p>\n

It was the emotional equivalent of waiting to be given a rose on The Bachelor<\/em>.<\/p>\n

I\u2019d stand there in church, watching everyone else fall down under the power of the Holy Spirit, weep, dance, and I\u2019d wonder\u2014where the hell is my <\/em>rose? And then the service would be over and I\u2019d be left wondering\u2026what is wrong with me? Is my skirt too short, causing my brother to stumble? Did I forget to confess a sin of omission?<\/p>\n

I was looking for the God who burned bushes and sent rainbows and\u2014let\u2019s be honest\u2014supernaturally slaughtered who people groups. (Which was always confusing because, why kill some and raise others?) I rarely, if ever, saw this God. He\u2013and of course it was always, always a HE\u2013 was the very definition of Aloof.<\/p>\n

Though I felt<\/em> God back then, in small ways and quiet moments, I didn\u2019t think that was good enough. Because I didn\u2019t see the God of lightning bolts and floods, miracles and wonders, I didn\u2019t think I<\/em> was good enough.<\/p>\n

Fast-forward a decade or so\u2026<\/p>\n

Now I see God everywhere, in everything beautiful: from the smile of a grocery store clerk on a rough day to my niece\u2019s laughter, the way my husband looks at me, maybe even in a well-deserved glass of wine with a dear friend. I see God when I walk the labyrinth near my house, when sunlight hits my face<\/p>\n

I hear God in the voice of my dearest friends. I feel God when my puppy slobbers on me. I touch God when I sit here typing away on this old laptop.<\/p>\n

For me, God is less person and more gravity: Ever-present, always working in ways so subtle and regular that it can be easy to forget to notice.<\/p>\n

So if God feels Aloof today, stop looking for God and start looking for love and beauty, anywhere and everywhere they may be found.<\/p>\n

And I think you\u2019ll discover that you aren\u2019t looking for God; God is looking at you.<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

This post is part of a Patheos roundtable discussion of Aloof<\/em>, and you can find more here: http:\/\/www.patheos.com\/Books\/<\/wbr><\/span>Book-Club\/Tony-Kriz-Aloof.html<\/a>. While I haven\u2019t read the entire book yet, what I have read is beautiful and courageous. Tony asks the tough questions and gives voice to fears we are often afraid to speak. Highly recommended.<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"