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{"id":4491,"date":"2016-03-07T17:09:08","date_gmt":"2016-03-07T22:09:08","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/admin.patheos.com\/blogs\/rebeccafrech\/?p=4491"},"modified":"2016-03-07T17:10:57","modified_gmt":"2016-03-07T22:10:57","slug":"stop-judging-the-crosses-of-others-and-start-asking-how-to-help","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/rebeccafrech\/2016\/03\/stop-judging-the-crosses-of-others-and-start-asking-how-to-help.html","title":{"rendered":"Stop Judging The Crosses of Others And Start Asking How to Help"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

$\"cross\"$ <\/a><\/p>\n

Last week, I opened up to an acquaintance about my Lenten fast. She had given up coffee, and asked what I was sacrificing. When I said, \u201cGrain, sugar, and meat,\u201d she giggled, crinkled her nose, and asked why. I told her simply that I was a food addict struggling to learn to control my addiction.<\/p>\n

She laughed and shook her head and told me, \u201cYou just have to stop eating. I mean\u2026I completely forget to eat. I can go the whole day and then realize I haven\u2019t eaten anything all day. Food isn\u2019t a real addiction. You just have to tell yourself to eat less.\u201d<\/p>\n

I made a mental note of why she\u2019s an acquaintance and not a friend, and changed the subject.\u00a0I know where she\u2019s coming from, because I used to be her. Seven children and six dress sizes back, I was the person who forgot to eat and couldn\u2019t imagine the struggle of someone who couldn\u2019t think of anything else.<\/p>\n

The thing was, it wasn\u2019t really about food. It wasn\u2019t even about addiction or compulsive behavior. It was about the size of my cross. I\u2019d turned to a sister in Christ and told her of the burden I was carrying, and she laughed at it and called it silly.<\/p>\n

I wish that this were an isolated incident, and that Christians (especially Catholics) were better at helping each other carry our crosses, but we aren\u2019t. We focus so much on the weight we are carrying that we can\u2019t really see the burdens of others for what they really are. We look jealously at each other\u2019s struggles and decide they are so much lighter<\/em> than our own.<\/p>\n

We are called to be Simon for each other, to lighten what our brothers and sisters are dragging around, but too often we do exactly the opposite. We add our scorn, laughter, and judgement to their already burdened shoulders.<\/p>\n

For the last days of this Lent, I\u2019m going to give up judging someone else\u2019s cross. I\u2019m going to stop thinking how much easier someone else has it than I do, and I\u2019m going to refocus my gaze on how I can help.<\/p>\n

Photo credit: <a href=\u201dhttps:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/internetarchivebookimages\/14563292560\/\u201d>Internet Archive Book Images<\/a> via <a href=\u201dhttps:\/\/visualhunt.com\u201d>Visualhunt.com<\/a> \/ <a href=\u201dhttp:\/\/flickr.com\/commons\/usage\/\u201d>No known copyright restrictions<\/a><\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"