****This seems really obvious given the title, but this post is about sex.\u00a0 If you\u2019re not old enough, GO AWAY.\u00a0 There will be something else for you to read another day.\u00a0 This one\u2019s for the grown ups.****<\/span> <\/p>\n A few weeks ago, a friend of mine and I were talking about the pressures of married life after 15+ years.\u00a0 We talked about the demands of children, our husbands\u2019 work schedules, and our ever growing to-do lists.\u00a0 I told her how it often feels as if my husband and I are two people who are traveling in the same direction and not always together.<\/p>\n \u201cYou need more sex,\u201d she said matter-of-factly.<\/p>\n I laughed it off, thinking that she must be joking.\u00a0 The last thing I want at the end of a day spent with children hanging all over me is to let one more person climb all over me, no matter how much I love him.\u00a0 I need some breathing room!\u00a0 (Sorry, honey!\u00a0 It gets better, I promise.)<\/p>\n The longer I thought about her suggestion, the more wisdom I saw in her advice, so much that it\u2019s the advice I\u2019ve been giving out.\u00a0 Ladies, our men need more sex!\u00a0 (Don\u2019t look at me in that tone of voice.\u00a0 You do have time.\u00a0 What kind of time commitment are we talking here? 30 minutes 3 times a week?\u00a0 You\u2019ve spent more time than that watching HGTV for goodness sake.)<\/p>\n Sex used to be a fun romp of play and spontaneity.\u00a0 At some point after we became parents, we began too often to forget to be lovers.\u00a0 When I\u2019m honest with myself, I admit that I miss it.\u00a0 I miss the hands that would graze across my body or the sexy innuendos on the phone.\u00a0 I miss him chasing me.\u00a0 I need him to be not just my husband but my hot lover, and guess what?\u00a0 He needs that, too.<\/p>\n Where I spend my day filled with little people kissing, hugging and loving on me all day long, my husband does not.\u00a0 He comes home in the evening having given his day up for us, and when he \u201cmakes his move\u201d, I often sigh or plead fatigue or headache.\u00a0 He doesn\u2019t hear the message I think I\u2019m sending (that I\u2019m too tired and worn out), he hears that I\u2019m rejecting him<\/i>!\u00a0 If he hears me reject him long enough, eventually he stops trying.\u00a0 (Please don\u2019t stop trying!)<\/p>\n It took a few weeks of really thinking and praying about it before I truly understood.\u00a0 My husband needs me to wrap him in my arms.\u00a0 He needs me to be his love, not just his children\u2019s mother.\u00a0 He needs to be held close to me and to feel my skin on his own.\u00a0 He needs to be shown that he is loved.\u00a0 He needs to feel that I love him.<\/p>\n I know all the arguments against more sex, i.e.\u00a0 you\u2019re tired, he\u2019s annoying, you\u2019re pregnant\/breastfeeding, you actually do have a headache, etc.\u00a0 I don\u2019t care.\u00a0 Sex is a gift you give to your spouse.\u00a0 You wrap yourself around him and show him that you accept him and love him as the person who he is.\u00a0 You silently (or not so silently\u2026.let that freak flag fly girl!) tell him again that he is the other half of you and that you wouldn\u2019t have it any other way.<\/p>\n What are you waiting for?\u00a0 Put on your sexiest underthings (the clean ones without the fraying edges).\u00a0 Put the kids to bed early. Then wrap your arms around his neck (arms not hands) and plant a kiss on him like you mean it.\u00a0 He\u2019ll take it from there.<\/p>\n P.S.\u00a0 I won\u2019t go into any more detail, but it works.\u00a0 Chase your man around the bedroom and watch the smile that he walks around wearing all day.\u00a0 (If you\u2019re home alone and you\u2019re lucky, it will be all<\/i> he wears all day.)<\/p>\n P.P.S.\u00a0 Not for nothing, it\u2019s good for you, too.\u00a0 It improves the complexion, burns a few calories and puts a smile on your face that tells the world you\u2019re well loved without your having to say a word.<\/p>\n You\u2019re welcome.<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" ****This seems really obvious given the title, but this post is about sex.\u00a0 If you\u2019re not old enough, GO AWAY.\u00a0 There will be something else for you to read another day.\u00a0 This one\u2019s for the grown ups.**** A few weeks ago, a friend of mine and I were talking about the pressures of married life […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1979,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-531","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\n