{"id":56,"date":"2014-08-07T22:24:00","date_gmt":"2014-08-07T22:24:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/admin.patheos.com\/blogs\/rebeccafrech\/2014\/08\/at-least-she-didnt-say-conversion.html"},"modified":"2014-08-22T15:46:55","modified_gmt":"2014-08-22T20:46:55","slug":"at-least-she-didnt-say-conversion","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/rebeccafrech\/2014\/08\/at-least-she-didnt-say-conversion.html","title":{"rendered":"At Least She Didn’t Say Conversion"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

It wasn\u2019t quite what we had hoped that it would be\u2026.Dr I was supposed to be our second opinion. She was sold to us as a brilliant physician who, while a little brusque, was extremely competent. She was meant to be unbiased by the chicanery of Dallas Children\u2019s Hospital\u2026.but she wasn\u2019t.<\/p>\n

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We started off with her chipper medical student assistant. She spent around 45 minutes examining Ella, and another half hour taking down her medical history. She asked us if we\u2019d had the MRI she saw had been ordered, and if there had been an a EMG performed. When I said that they had been done, she asked to know where because she didn\u2019t have any record of them or results in Ella\u2019s records<\/i>.<\/div>\n

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The Medical Student didn\u2019t ask as many questions as I\u2019d have expected, but I chalked that up her youth and inexperience. She was friendly, even if she was a tiny bit unsure of what she was doing. Then, she\u00a0<\/span>stepped into the hall, and we heard her in conversation with a woman whom I assumed was Dr I.\u00a0<\/span><\/div>\n

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When she reappeared, it was with a Germanic-looking woman whose stern expression was unsettling. There was no warmth or friendliness in her gaze as she began examining Ella in the shortest, most perfunctory neurological exam I\u2019ve ever seen. In fewer than five minutes, she seemed to have made a decision about my daughter\u2019s fate. She stepped away from the exam table, and fixed us with her gaze.<\/span><\/div>\n

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\u201cAlright,\u201d she stated, \u201cI\u2019ve looked over the other physicians\u2019 notes and the test results, and they are all normal. There is nothing neurological wrong with her, so what is it that you want me to do?<\/i>\u201c<\/span><\/div>\n

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My mind raced as my jaw dropped open. How had she reviewed the test results she didn\u2019t have? Why had she read the records when she was supposed to be unbiased? Her diagnosis had been set before she even walked into the room. Why had she wasted our time?<\/span><\/div>\n

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\u201cWe want to know why she can\u2019t walk, and whether or not it\u2019s going to spread,\u201d I gulped uncertainly.<\/span><\/div>\n

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\u201cI don\u2019t know what else I could possibly test that hasn\u2019t already been done. There\u2019s nothing neurologically wrong that I can see. She\u2019s completely healthy. All that she needs is intense physical therapy.\u201d<\/span><\/div>\n

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My mind raced and I stammered \u201c\u2026what about her toes that don\u2019t wrinkle? Her legs that are cold and hairless? What about the lack of sensation even when she\u2019s asleep? The neurophyschologist said that it was her para..\u201d<\/span><\/div>\n

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\u201cYou don\u2019t need to worry about that.\u201d She \u00a0interrupted me, and with finality said, \u201cShe needs intense physical therapy every day and she will get better. That\u2019s it.\u201d<\/span><\/div>\n

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And with that she walked abruptly from the room.<\/span><\/div>\n

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Ella reached up and touched my arm as she said, \u201cLet\u2019s go to the car mom, so that no one can see you when you start to cry.\u201d<\/span><\/div>\n

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I\u2019ve spent all day coming up with the things I wish I would have asked:\u00a0<\/span><\/div>\n
She\u2019s been in physical therapy three times a week since this began, and still declined. Why will it make a difference now..<\/span><\/div>\n

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If this helps her, we will be the most ecstatic of parents. If it doesn\u2019t, what\u2019s our next move?<\/span><\/div>\n

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How long should we wait before we know whether or not it\u2019s helping?<\/span><\/div>\n

<\/span><\/div>\n
Why don\u2019t the signs of autonomic nervous system damage matter? What caused them?<\/span><\/div>\n

<\/span><\/div>\n
Why aren\u2019t her poor circulation signs important? What caused them?<\/span><\/div>\n

<\/span><\/div>\n
Even if physical therapy heals her, why caused this? What\u2019s to stop it from returning?<\/font><\/div>\n

<\/font><\/div>\n
What was the point of examining Ella if you\u2019d already made up your mind from the notes of other doctors?<\/font><\/div>\n

<\/font><\/div>\n
How did you review test results that you didn\u2019t have?<\/font><\/div>\n

<\/font><\/div>\n

<\/font><\/div>\n

<\/font><\/div>\n
And a thousand others\u2026<\/font><\/div>\n

<\/font><\/div>\n

<\/font><\/div>\n
So there you have it. She did everything but say Conversion. Only the finding of three psychiatric professionals stopped her from using that word, but it was clearly understood.<\/font><\/div>\n

<\/font><\/div>\n
It would seem that all we\u2019ve needed since April was good physical therapy. Who knew? (I\u2019m now going to go whack my head against a wall.<\/i>)<\/font><\/div>\n

<\/font><\/div>\n

<\/font><\/div>\n
Thank you all for your prayers and support. I\u2019m sorry to not have happier things to report.<\/font><\/div>\n

<\/span><\/div>\n

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<\/span><\/div>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It wasn\u2019t quite what we had hoped that it would be\u2026.Dr I was supposed to be our second opinion. She was sold to us as a brilliant physician who, while a little brusque, was extremely competent. She was meant to be unbiased by the chicanery of Dallas Children\u2019s Hospital\u2026.but she wasn\u2019t. We started off with […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1979,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-56","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\nAt Least She Didn't Say Conversion<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"It wasn't quite what we had hoped that it would be....Dr I was supposed to be our second opinion. 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