We\u2019ve received a few early Christmas gifts at our house, and with every box we open I begin to have serious doubts about the people we love.\u00a0 What are they giving us?\u00a0 What messages of love are they trying to send? Well\u2026hold onto your hats, because at The Mom\u2019s house we\u2019ve gotten:<\/p>\n
1.\u00a0 laser hair removal \u2013\u00a0 \u201cI love you enough to want to set parts of you on fire.\u201d
2.\u00a0 6 lbs of bacon\u00a0 \u2013 \u201cWhat better way to celebrate the birth of a Jewish boy than with pork?\u201d
3.\u00a0 lye soap\u00a0 \u2013\u00a0 \u201cThat perfumey stuff just ain\u2019t cutting the funk.\u201d
4. a key on a bottle opener key chain \u2013 just a random key we\u2019re not sure what it unlocks \u2013 \u201cI didn\u2019t know what to get you, so here\u2019s a key from my junk drawer.\u00a0 I thought you might get thirsty trying to figure out what it goes to, so here\u2019s a bottle opener to go with it.\u201d
5. 2 boxes of ammunition \u2013 \u201cMerry Christmas.\u00a0 Now go kill something.\u201d
6. a pair of men\u2019s dress socks \u2013\u00a0 no clue here \u2026\u2026. LarryD?
7. one dessert plate \u2013 just the one \u2013 \u201cI thought it was cute and couldn\u2019t afford the whole set.\u00a0 If the rest of you want pie you\u2019ll have to share.\u201d
8. a gift card to the thrift store \u2013 Really?\u00a0 do I dress that badly? \u2013 \u201cYes, you do.\u201d\u00a0 \u2013 Well, I appreciate your honesty.
9. a bedazzled eyelash curler and tweezer set \u2013 \u201cMaybe if your personal grooming stuff was pretty\u2026you\u2019d actually use it\u2026\u201d
10. a flower made out of leather \u2013 there\u2019s no explanation for this one \u2013 it\u2019s a flower\u2026.made out of leather\u2026can we move on?<\/p>\n
We love our friends and family because they\u2019re ours and also because they amuse us so much.\u00a0 Who else do you know that gets this kind of loot the week before Christmas?\u00a0 I\u2019m kind of hoping it\u2019s a lead up to the awesomeness that awaits us on Christmas morning\u2026..<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
We\u2019ve received a few early Christmas gifts at our house, and with every box we open I begin to have serious doubts about the people we love.\u00a0 What are they giving us?\u00a0 What messages of love are they trying to send? Well\u2026hold onto your hats, because at The Mom\u2019s house we\u2019ve gotten: 1.\u00a0 laser hair […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1979,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-733","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\n