15 years ago today, I was not yet \u201cthe Mom\u201d.\u00a0 I was not yet \u201cthe Wife.\u201d\u00a0 I was simply a newly engaged girl, much in love with my fiance.<\/p>\n
!5 years ago this morning, I can tell you exactly where I was .\u00a0 I was standing behind the front desk of the high-end hotel where I worked.\u00a0 I was checking-out guests and joking with the manager.\u00a0 It was a quiet and easy morning at work and there was a chance of my going home early.\u00a0 Then we heard a loud boom and every door in the hotel flew open.\u00a0 It sounded as if a semi truck had hit the side of the building.\u00a0 The manager vaulted over the desk and ran outside, only to return a moment later white-faced and shaken.<\/p>\n
\u201cI think a plane crashed in downtown,\u201d he said.\u00a0 \u201cThere\u2019s a huge plume of black smoke. God bless all those who died.\u201d<\/p>\n
We, the front desk girls, got misty eyed at the thought of such a tragedy.\u00a0 A plane crash how sad that would be.\u00a0 Then the General Manager staggered out to where we were.\u00a0 He looked shaken.\u00a0 It was no plane crash he told us.\u00a0 Someone had set off a bomb downtown.\u00a0 The doors had flown open when the shockwave had hit us.\u00a0 We just stared at him, dumbfounded.\u00a0 This is Oklahoma City.\u00a0 Things like that don\u2019t happen here.<\/p>\n
They do.<\/p>\n
The early news reports said that the Journal Record Building had been the target.\u00a0 The building where my sweetheart worked.\u00a0 The building where my future went to the office everyday.\u00a0 Numb shock spread through my body.\u00a0 Was I widowed before I was even a wife?<\/p>\n
One of my co-workers walked me down to the workout facility where those who were waiting on news of their loved ones were gathering.\u00a0 It had the large TV so that we could watch the news and wait for word.\u00a0 It was just after 9:30 in the morning. \u00a0 Within 20 minutes, the kitchen staff started bringing in comfort food for those of us waiting.\u00a0 The building engineer brought us a dedicated phone line.\u00a0 There were 5 of us huddled together.\u00a0 Not one of us spoke.\u00a0 We sat together for hours and said nothing, too horrified for words.<\/p>\n
My love\u2019s relatives kept calling me, asking for news.\u00a0 I had none to give them.\u00a0 He had not called me, and I didn\u2019t know if he could call me.\u00a0 The phones were down over much of the city, and in the era pre-cell-phone, that meant no news.<\/p>\n
After 5 1\/2 hours of sitting in the gym, eating macaroni and cheese, and watching the news, at last a call came for me.\u00a0 It was my sweetheart\u2019s aunt.\u00a0 She had driven past his house and his car was in the driveway, but she had knocked and there was no answer.<\/p>\n
I flew to his house.\u00a0 I flung open the door without stopping to knock and ran into the house.\u00a0 He was standing in the long hallway.\u00a0 All of the doors were shut and it was dark, but he just stood there.\u00a0 I knew instinctively that he had been there for a long while.<\/p>\n
\u201cMy love,\u201d I asked, \u201cwhy are you standing in the hallway?\u201d<\/p>\n
He looked at me with haunted eyes and replied, \u201cThere are no windows in the hallway.\u201d\u00a0 Flying glass, he had seen horrors created by flying glass, the hallway was safe.<\/p>\n
He was filthy, covered with dirt, sweat and other unknown substances.\u00a0 I forced him to take a shower, and then I put him to bed.\u00a0 He looked at me with his sad eyes and began to tell me of the things he had seen that day.\u00a0 He vomited up the details in painful and graphic detail, and when he was done he fell immediately to sleep.\u00a0 It was 4:00 in the afternoon.<\/p>\n
He will not discuss these things now, except rarely with me.\u00a0 There are details which I know he has forgotten.\u00a0 I remember them all, just as he told me.\u00a0 I am his memory, his witness. We have not been to the memorial museum.\u00a0 He doesn\u2019t want to see it, and I have his memories burned into my brain.\u00a0 I would never go without him, and he won\u2019t go.\u00a0 My sweet husband\u2019s name is on the survivor wall at the memorial downtown.\u00a0 We\u2019ve never seen it.\u00a0 People make rubbings of it and give them to us.\u00a0 I put them away in a drawer.\u00a0 I am proud of the things he did that day, the heroism and the calm in the face of calamity.\u00a0 He was and is an amazing human being. <\/p>\n
15 years ago today I almost lost him.\u00a0 A mad man with a truck and a bomb shattered the peace of our city.\u00a0 Some people would be bitter, but the people here are not.\u00a0 We have learned that tragedies can happen anywhere, that our loved ones can be gone in an instant, that tragedy is not a respecter of age or social standing.\u00a0 Today, we will hold our loved ones a little tighter, make sure we tell them we love them, and thank God for the gift of one more day with them.<\/p>\n
I am one of the fortunate ones.\u00a0 I lost nothing that day but a little naivete.\u00a0 But every year this date rolls around and calls to mind all that I have and reminds me to be grateful<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
15 years ago today, I was not yet \u201cthe Mom\u201d.\u00a0 I was not yet \u201cthe Wife.\u201d\u00a0 I was simply a newly engaged girl, much in love with my fiance. !5 years ago this morning, I can tell you exactly where I was .\u00a0 I was standing behind the front desk of the high-end hotel where […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1979,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-928","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\n