{"id":23461,"date":"2014-05-07T08:40:24","date_gmt":"2014-05-07T12:40:24","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/religionprof\/?p=23461"},"modified":"2014-05-07T08:40:24","modified_gmt":"2014-05-07T12:40:24","slug":"the-beatitudes-blooper-reel","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/religionprof\/2014\/05\/the-beatitudes-blooper-reel.html","title":{"rendered":"The Beatitudes Blooper Reel"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

\u201cAction,\u201d said the director.<\/p>\n

\u201cBlessed are the rich, for they have been blessed by God,\u201d Jesus spoke to the camera.<\/p>\n

\u201cBlessed are the poor, for through their donations in the hope of miracles, rich preachers can travel conveniently in their own jet plane.<\/p>\n

Blessed are those who suffer not, for they are clearly blessed by God more than I am.<\/p>\n

Blessed are the proud, for evidently they are omniscient.<\/p>\n

Blessed are those who can persuade themselves that they are persecuted for righteousness\u2019 sake, for they can treat the criticisms of others as just more proof that they are right.<\/p>\n

Blessed are\u2026\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

\u201cCUT!\u201d cried Peter, who was serving as the director.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s wrong?\u201d asked Jesus. \u201cThat was just for the bloopers reel, as a joke. I\u2019m ready to film the real version whenever you are\u201d.<\/p>\n

\u201cI thought I told you,\u201d replied Peter. \u201cToday\u2019s broadcast was going out\u00a0live<\/em>\u201c.<\/p>\n

Jesus, enraged, drove Peter and the other Apostles, the cameramen and stage crew, from the studio, using a whip made of microphone cords.<\/p>\n

Unfortunately the televangelists and many others simply mistook Jesus\u2019 joke for Gospel truth. They failed to see Jesus\u2019 reaction to the whole incident, because it wasn\u2019t televised.<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

[The above originally appeared on my blog in 2008<\/a>.]<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u201cAction,\u201d said the director. \u201cBlessed are the rich, for they have been blessed by God,\u201d Jesus spoke to the camera. \u201cBlessed are the poor, for through their donations in the hope of miracles, rich preachers can travel conveniently in their own jet plane. Blessed are those who suffer not, for they are clearly blessed by […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":136,"featured_media":23584,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[131],"tags":[1065,1265,5677],"class_list":["post-23461","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-christianity-religion","tag-beatitudes","tag-bloopers","tag-jesus"],"yoast_head":"\nThe Beatitudes Blooper Reel<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"\u201cAction,\u201d said the director. \u201cBlessed are the rich, for they have been blessed by God,\u201d Jesus spoke to the camera. \u201cBlessed are the poor, for through\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/religionprof\/2014\/05\/the-beatitudes-blooper-reel.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"The Beatitudes Blooper Reel\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"\u201cAction,\u201d said the director. \u201cBlessed are the rich, for they have been blessed by God,\u201d Jesus spoke to the camera. \u201cBlessed are the poor, for through\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/religionprof\/2014\/05\/the-beatitudes-blooper-reel.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Religion Prof: The Blog of James F. 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