Many people describe depression as a kind of intense grief. It is a deep sadness. It\u2019s like heartbreak, agony and despair all at once. I think depression is worse than grief. Grief usually has an identifiable cause. There are stages. People understand why you are sad. It eases with time.<\/p>\n
I find that depression is more like death. In every depressive episode, something is lost. Sometimes it\u2019s the belief that I\u2019m not that sick. Sometimes it\u2019s a dream. Sometimes it\u2019s a concrete plan or goal. Sometimes it\u2019s who I desperately wanted and expected myself to be. Sometimes it\u2019s a harmful lie I\u2019ve told myself, or that someone told me. Sometimes what dies, needed to go. Most times, it seems I would have been perfectly fine without the loss. I would smile more. I would know how I spent the hours in my day. I would see fewer doctors. When people ask me how I am doing, my response of \u201cfine\u201d would only be a lie thirty percent of the time. Like most people, right?<\/p>\n