{"id":322,"date":"2016-10-10T10:05:00","date_gmt":"2016-10-10T15:05:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/sixseeds.patheos.com\/rolandwarren\/?p=322"},"modified":"2017-11-30T14:52:08","modified_gmt":"2017-11-30T14:52:08","slug":"6-tips-to-protect-your-child-from-bullying","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/rolandwarren\/2016\/10\/6-tips-to-protect-your-child-from-bullying\/","title":{"rendered":"6 Tips to Protect Your Child from Bullying"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

\"Two
Two bully boys beating up a small boy<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<\/p>

My 4th<\/sup> grade year was an especially difficult time for me. My parents had recently separated. My older kid brother tragically drowned at a public pool during our summer vacation. And, my mother, my other siblings and I moved to a new neighborhood, which meant that I had to attend a new school\u2014my third in as many years.<\/p>\n

And then there was this kid named Elmer*\u2026<\/p>\n

I met Elmer on my first day of the 4th<\/sup> grade or more accurately, Elmer met me. You see, he had an important role in the 4th<\/sup> grade world. He was the class bully and he and his side \u201ckicker,\u201d Gene*, approached me during my first trip to the playground. Elmer was a kid of few words. He was a boy of action and he made it pretty clear that he did not like me and when the last class bell tolled, it tolled for me.<\/p>\n

Needless to say, it was a bit difficult to focus during class and the time moved a little too fast for my taste that day. When last bell rang, I had one task\u2014locate Elmer before he \u201cdislocated\u201d me. Fortunately, Elmer\u2019s approach to bullying was similar to that of a lion surveying prey on the Serengeti. He generally attacked the slow and on day I was the quick and not the dead. Alas, I would live to play another day\u2026<\/p>\n

I had not thought much about Elmer over the years but I was reminded of him when one of my sons was in the 6th<\/sup> grade. We were having a family dinner and our normally talkative son was unusually quiet. When I asked him what was wrong, he said \u201cnothing\u201d but eventually he burst into tears. He had met the \u201cson of Elmer\u201d and was struggling with how to handle the situation. Apparently, this bully would frequently push my son from behind, knock the books out of my son\u2019s hands, etc. and the situation was growing worse as time passed.<\/p>\n

I must admit that I was quite tempted to go up to the school and \u201cdeal\u201d with the kid personally. Fortunately, I didn\u2019t or I would probably just be coming up for parole about now. Furthermore, I knew that this was not the last \u201cElmer\u201d my son was going to encounter and he needed to know how to deal with them. So, once my son was able to compose himself, we discussed strategies of how to handle this situation and ended the bullying quickly.<\/p>\n

Bullying is something many children will encounter in some form. It can be name-calling, being picked upon or worse. And, nowadays it can happen in person or online. There is a temptation, especially for dads, to say, \u201cwhat\u2019s the big deal\u201d or \u201cisn\u2019t this just innocent kid\u2019s stuff?\u201d But the fact is that all forms of bullying are abusive and can leave a painful legacy that can affect children even into adulthood. And, of particular note, dads have a unique and important role to play in helping their kids deal with bullies. Indeed, the social science data shows that children with involved dads are more likely to exhibit pro-social behavior, like proper impulse control and good conflict resolution skills and, thereby, are less likely to bully or be the target of bullies.<\/p>\n

So if your kid is being bullied, here are some things to consider:<\/p>\n