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This week I\u2019m lucky to have the flexibility (and frequent flyer miles) to fly to Pennsylvania to spend Thanksgiving with my parents, my sister and my brother.\u00a0 I have two other brothers who won\u2019t be able to make it \u2014 but still, I\u2019m very thankful I get to spend the holiday with the fam.[br]I haven\u2019t always been able to be with family on holidays, though.\u00a0 And I haven\u2019t always had a place to go.<\/p>\n
I grew up in Pennsylvania, but went to college in Los Angeles, and I couldn\u2019t afford to fly home for Thanksgiving.\u00a0 Another girl in my dorm was in the same situation, so we house-sat for a family in Los Angeles, who lived close to our college. \u00a0 We spent Thanksgiving in our pajamas, doing homework.\u00a0 We took a quick break to eat TV dinners, and then did more homework. \u00a0 Then we decided we were bored, so we went to a drug store (still in our pajamas) and bought hair dye, and dyed each others\u2019 hair.<\/p>\n
Another Thanksgiving, I was living in Portland, attending a church of thousands of people, but no one invited me over for Thanksgiving.\u00a0 The idea of spending the day alone in my apartment was depressing, so I called a friend in New York who was also single and didn\u2019t have anywhere to go.\u00a0 We met in Puerto Rico and had Italian food at our hotel\u2019s restaurant for our Thanksgiving dinner.<\/p>\n
Hair dye and spaghetti are not exactly, well\u2026..festive.<\/p>\n
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I know I\u2019m not the only one who\u2019s experienced loneliness on a holiday.\u00a0 I have lots of single friends who have also spent holidays alone because no one invited them to join their family.<\/p>\n
There was a widower in one of my dad\u2019s churches when I was growing up who was so lonely, he would go to the grocery store and push an empty cart around the store for hours, just to feel close to people.<\/p>\n
Another widower\u00a0had Christmas dinner at the diner because his family was far away, and he didn\u2019t know how to cook.<\/p>\n
We can do better, people. \u00a0We can do better \u2014 as individuals and as a society.<\/p>\n
Here\u2019s the thing.\u00a0 If we\u2019ve decided as a society that it\u2019s not polite to invite yourself to things, we\u2019d better be darn good at inviting each other.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n I think it\u2019s important for all of us to take a minute this week and think about the Invisible people around us. \u00a0 So here are a few things I think we can do to take care of each other this week.<\/p>\n 1) People who live on the streets\u00a0need\u00a0to eat 365 days a year, not just on Thanksgiving and Christmas Day.<\/strong><\/p>\n It\u2019s great to volunteer at a shelter, serving a special meal to people who live on the streets, on Thanksgiving or Christmas day.<\/p>\n But remember\u00a0that homeless people are just like you \u2014 they like to eat three meals every<\/em> day, not just a feast on Thanksgiving and Christmas. \u00a0 And your local shelter might prefer faithful volunteers throughout the year instead of a barrage of phone calls during the holidays from\u00a0people who want to\u00a0an unusual activity to do on Thanksgiving and Christmas.<\/p>\n 2) Being lonely on a holiday is just as tragic as going hungry. \u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n Emotional pain is just as painful \u2014 if not more so \u2014 than physical pain. \u00a0So someone eating a T.V. dinner in their living room alone on a holiday is just as tragic as someone going hungry. \u00a0 It\u2019s not fun, and\u00a0it is 100% preventable. \u00a0No one needs to spend a holiday like that.<\/p>\n As human beings, we don\u2019t just need food on Thanksgiving; we need a place to belong. \u00a0We need a place at the table that was set for us by someone else with tenderness and care. \u00a0By someone who wanted<\/em> us there.<\/p>\n 3) Homeless people are not the only people who are Invisible.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n I guarantee you, you know someone who is planning to spend the holiday alone.\u00a0 They might be a coworker or a fellow congregant or a friend or a neighbor who lives down the street.<\/p>\n And it is just as unnecessary for them to be alone as it is for a homeless person to go hungry.<\/p>\n So I would invite you today to pick up the phone, or get your texting fingers ready, and ASK people \u2014 especially exchange students and people who are single, widowed, separated or divorced \u2014 if they have a place to go.\u00a0 And if not, ask them if you could set them a place at your table.<\/p>\n It may not seem like a profound gesture to you, but trust me, just by asking someone that simple question \u2014\u00a0Do you want to spend Thanksgiving with us?<\/em>\u00a0\u2014 you could make the difference between someone feeling lonely and invisible this Thanksgiving, and someone feeling loved and wanted and known and seen.<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" This week I\u2019m lucky to have the flexibility (and frequent flyer miles) to fly to Pennsylvania to spend Thanksgiving with my parents, my sister and my brother.\u00a0 I have two other brothers who won\u2019t be able to make it \u2014 but still, I\u2019m very thankful I get to spend the holiday with the fam.[br]I haven\u2019t […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3133,"featured_media":622,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[3052,679,682,3070,3073,3076,2485,178,3064,559,1489],"class_list":["post-617","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-dinner","tag-family","tag-friends","tag-homelessness","tag-hunger","tag-invisible","tag-loneliness","tag-refugees","tag-thanksgiving","tag-the-invisible-girls","tag-turkey"],"yoast_head":"\n![\"Screen](\"https:\/\/static1.squarespace.com\/static\/58ded737ff7c50424d8e8f9a\/59c9e1977e2a5f917af8ffc0\/59c9e1987e2a5f917af90305\/1506406786364\/Screen-Shot-2015-11-23-at-7.03.59-PM.png.59-PM.png?format=original\")
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