{"id":947,"date":"2011-12-14T13:46:00","date_gmt":"2011-12-14T21:46:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/scientologybeliefs\/?p=947"},"modified":"2017-10-24T05:14:16","modified_gmt":"2017-10-24T12:14:16","slug":"dont-bypass-your-child-part-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/scientologybeliefs\/2011\/12\/dont-bypass-your-child-part-2\/","title":{"rendered":"Don\u2019t Bypass Your Child (Part 2)"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

\"Children<\/a><\/h1>\n
\n

This is the second of two (perhaps more) posts on the subject of\u00a0bypassing your children<\/a> \u2013 and in this context, bypassing means to ignore their efforts to help or do work that is theirs, and instead doing it yourself.<\/p>\n

I realized after writing\u00a0my last post on the topic<\/a> that there is so much more that could be written on this, and so many other facets to the issue.\u00a0\u00a0 The facet mainly covered in the first post was that the more you bypass them and don\u2019t let them do the work, the more you\u2019re grooving in the fact that they don\u2019t do the work, and\u00a0you do<\/strong>.\u00a0 I.e., you cop all of the work and end up as an overworked parent.<\/p>\n

Making a More Responsible Child<\/strong><\/p>\n

Another facet of why you don\u2019t want to habitually bypass a child lies in something that is one of the bare-bones basics of Scientology.\u00a0 If you look at the Scientology symbol, it\u2019s an S with two triangles.\u00a0 The bottom triangle \u2013 the Affinity-Reality-Communication triangle, is covered in depth in this video.\u00a0 The\u00a0top<\/em> triangle, however, is the one relevant here \u2013 the triangle symbolizing the interrelationship between\u00a0knowledge, responsibility and control<\/strong><\/a>.\u00a0 (more info<\/a>)<\/p>\n

In an issue L. Ron Hubbard wrote for the\u00a0Executive Series<\/em> of organization policy letters, he wrote the following:<\/p>\n

\u201cIt is hard to fully know something or be responsible for something over which you have no CONTROL, otherwise the result can be an overwhelm.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u2013 LRH <\/strong>(18 Feb 72, THE TOP TRIANGLE)<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

So, obviously, whether you\u2019re training an employee or raising a child, you would want them to have maximal control of their work area or their environment.\u00a0\u00a0 But that\u2019s where, again, this mechanism of the habitual-bypass comes in.<\/p>\n

As I watch my daughter grow up, she is constantly finding new things about which she can be responsible, and which she can control.\u00a0 She found out she could push the buttons on the microwave, and if she uses her step, she can load her own food into the microwave & cook it.\u00a0 She found out she can control a rag and a spray bottle, so when she spills something, she expects to be able to clean it herself.\u00a0 Et cetera.<\/p>\n

Now, the problem comes in when you all of the sudden, randomly (to them) interrupting that control and asserting that they\u00a0can\u2019t do it<\/strong> for whatever reason (you\u2019re late for work \/ they\u2019re taking to long \/ they suck at it \/ they\u2019re making a mess \/ etc).\u00a0 What happens then?<\/p>\n

The mechanics of that, LRH discusses in another organization policy, this one written on 24 March 1985 and entitled\u00a0RESPONSIBILITY, CONTROL AND DANGER CONDITIONS:<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cAn executive can tend to occasionally sever somebody\u2019s responsibility line.\u00a0 it\u2019s a technical point.<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cAs one definition of responsibility is to defend one\u2019s control of an area, an exec can sometimes tend to sever that control point.\u201d \u2013 LRH<\/strong><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

He then goes on to detail that this is why execs continue to get repeatedly pulled into an area \u2013 and the same applies to parents.\u00a0 That if you habitually bypass your child (or junior employee) and fail to take the necessary steps so that they can be responsible for the area you just bypassed them on \u2013 they will assume it is\u00a0NOT THEIR RESPONSIBILITY<\/strong> and will relinquish control for it.<\/p>\n

Just THINK about that for a bit.<\/p>\n

\"image\"<\/a>It applies to potty training.\u00a0 It applies to why kids don\u2019t clean their rooms.\u00a0 It applies to a\u00a0lot <\/em>of things.<\/p>\n

Again, I\u2019d fully recommend a study of all of these related policies \u2013 they\u2019re all available in\u00a0Organization Executive Course Volume 0<\/a>.\u00a0\u00a0 But at the very least, do the free course on Ethics and the Conditions which gives you the essence of these factors and what to do about it.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

This is the second of two (perhaps more) posts on the subject of\u00a0bypassing your children \u2013 and in this context, bypassing means to ignore their efforts to help or do work that is theirs, and instead doing it yourself. 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