![\"Day3TribeFindingblog\"](\"https:\/\/oshetablogs.files.wordpress.com\/2013\/10\/day3tribefindingblog.jpg\")
<\/a><\/p>\nIf you say something to me that I disagree with, I\u2019ll scrunch up my face and say as sweetly as apple pie, \u201cWow, you really think that?\u00a0 That\u2019s fascinating!\u201d<\/p>\n
But, really what I mean is, \u201cHow on earth can you be so wrong!\u00a0 You my friend, are cra-zy.\u201d<\/p>\n
I am a fantastic coward!<\/p>\n
You\u2019d think being a church planter I\u2019d have a little more guts to lovingly draw-out my friends with different views\u2014after all, I am helping my husband form a new community of believers in one of the most under-church cities in America.<\/p>\n
But\u2026no.<\/p>\n
When it comes to drama, and especially girl drama<\/i>, I nod and sweetly comment, \u201cFascinating!\u201d<\/p>\n
Part of me never feels equipped to handle their indignant confusion when we disagree, but most of me is afraid of letting my pride hang all out.<\/p>\n
You see, I love, love, love, my<\/i> ideas. I value my <\/i>convictions. I think my <\/i>passions supersede any other passion-worthy cause in the history of the world\u2014ever!<\/p>\n
Sometimes I chuckle when I\u2019m called sweet! I wish I could let my friends\u00a0 get inside my brain for a minute and see that I\u2019m constantly fielding prejudices, snap judgments, and slurs. I consistently struggle to bring those thoughts back to Jesus so that he can renew my thinking.<\/p>\n
If men think about sex every day and Carrie Bradshaw thinks about shoes every hour, then I think about my \u201crightness\u201d, my \u201cbetter-ness\u201d, my \u201ctheological soundness\u201d\u00a0 all the time.<\/p>\n
It\u2019s exhausting, really.<\/p>\n
So I say, \u201cfascinating\u201d and nod in disagreements.<\/p>\n
I try to remind myself:<\/p>\n
My way is not always the best way; it\u2019s one of the ways God reveals and breathes of life into His people.\u00a0 The primary goal of being a Kingdom Woman isn\u2019t to clearly identify right and wrong\u2014 it\u2019s to live and freely give,\u00a0 grace and peace. Grace for each on our journeys with Jesus and peace on the road as we walk side by side, hand in hand.<\/i><\/p>\n
But, most of the time the ticker tape of my brain says:<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m wrong and your right.\u00a0 I\u2019m biblical and your not.\u00a0 I look like Jesus and you don\u2019t.\u00a0 So\u2026. na-na-na-na na <\/b><\/i>pbbbt<\/i><\/b>!!!!\u201d<\/i><\/p>\n
Mature, right?<\/p>\n
This is the why tribe is SUCH a loaded word for me.\u00a0 I\u2019ve got pride and divisive tendencies flowing all through me.<\/p>\n
\u201cTribes\u201d sounds so violent. Like we\u2019re warrior women, forming an orb around our Campfire Calls ready to demolish any opposing tribe\u2019s member.<\/p>\n
Yet, there is something incredibly life-giving about tribes! I\u2019m drawn to the possibility of sitting with a group of women who I don\u2019t have to field per-conceived notions, graciously unpack baggage, define terms, or discern which picture of God they hold.\u00a0 I want both\u2014 peace in the body but distinct expressions of faith. They seem like drastically different goals, until I observed death and resurrection in the apple orchard.<\/p>\n \u00a0 As I wandered the between the rows of apple trees on Monday, I noticed all the rotting apples.\u00a0 Everywhere were smashed into the ground, left to wither away dying apples.<\/p>\n Observing all this death combined\u00a0 with the goodness and life of the orchard, I was reminded of a principle I learned form Nadia Bolz Weber in \u201cPastrix<\/a>\u201d.<\/p>\n In God\u2019s ecology, death must always precede life.\u00a0 The cross always comes before the resurrection.<\/p>\n And I began to wonder:\u00a0 could there be life-giving tribes with distinct views and<\/em>\u00a0 peaceful, loving unity in the Body?<\/p>\n I think so because love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud<\/strong>. (1 Corinthians 13:4<\/a>).<\/em><\/p>\n In order for us to thrive in our diverse tribes, but maintain Kingdom unity, we must embrace a humility that daily destroys the narrative that, \u201cour way is the right, best, only way\u201d. A loving, gracious approach to these distinctions matter.<\/p>\n This approach separates the person from their positions and creates space to engage as friends and not clash as combatants.\u00a0 For us to be a a tribe, and do it well, we must commit to a culture of peace that never confuses the core convictions of our sisters with their core identities as Kingdom Women.<\/b><\/p>\n I<\/p>\n There are good and godly women rallying in tribes all across the world who hold different convictions\u2014 yet love our Jesus \u201csomething fierce\u201d!<\/p>\n So, let\u2019s fiercely love them<\/i><\/b> by letting our pride fall to the ground, smashing it into the earth and letting it waste away.<\/p>\n I want tribes, but I want peace too.<\/p>\n I want life.\u00a0 So something must die.<\/p>\n I want to be so full of love and grace that when my friend disagrees with me, that I invite the hard conversations and not run from them. I don\u2019t want my pride to prevent me from learning to lovingly engage with \u201cthe other\u201d.<\/p>\n In the days to come I\u2019ll be sharing the distinct convictions that set me apart from other tribes\u2026maybe they\u2019ll resonate with you\u2026but if so, remember with me that we\u2019re not better.\u00a0\u00a0 Just different. \u00a0We\u2019re simply girls who must avail ourselves to the grace of God. Every. Single. Day.<\/p>\n Tomorrow, I\u2019ll write my weekly FMF and find a way to make the word meaningful to our one of our distinctives.\u00a0 Will it be super well edited? Probably not.\u00a0 Will it be the most theologically astute tome you\u2019ve every read?\u00a0 Sister, please!\u00a0 Will it be from my heart and reveal God\u2019s covenantal love to us? I truly hope so.<\/p>\n This weekend I\u2019ll post unity liturgies to remind us to commit to peace within and without our tribes.<\/p>\n Monday we\u2019re getting into our picture of God and there is nothing he desires more than for us to see him clearly and accurately, as revealed in Jesus Christ on the cross.<\/p>\n Yours Because We\u2019re His,<\/p>\n<\/a><\/p>\n<\/a><\/p>\n