“Our job is to love others without stopping to inquire whether or not they are worthy.”
“Love is not a feeling, Mr. Burns. It’s an ability.”
“The Bible isn’t meant to keep people apart; it isn’t meant to be a badge of honor.”
“I don’t support going around disparaging other people’s religion, but it’s not a crime.”
“Count me among the holy extinguished. I am no longer on fire for Jesus.”
“Life’s too short to be an asshole, as an employer or as an employee.”
“My breakup forecast shows you losing 35 of the albums you bought together at garage sales, leaving you with only 15, including Sting’s fourth solo record, Ten Summoner’s Tales, which neither of you really wanted.”
“Rule of thumb: Get at least three fictional sources before publishing serious allegations involving imaginary groups.”
“The panel of judges sided with the Yankees, ruling that the Yankees are strongly associated with the phrase.”
“Moreover, problems resulting from the required concentration to maintain such control may even result in subsequent stress symptoms.”
“They don’t deliver, they pick up.”
“Church Sign Epic Fails: ‘Apocalypse Now'”
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