{"id":1950,"date":"2020-02-12T10:00:55","date_gmt":"2020-02-12T14:00:55","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/admin.patheos.com\/blogs\/socialjesus\/?p=1950"},"modified":"2020-02-11T17:51:41","modified_gmt":"2020-02-11T21:51:41","slug":"patriarchy-jesus-divorce","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/socialjesus\/2020\/02\/patriarchy-jesus-divorce\/","title":{"rendered":"The Patriarchy, Justice, and Jesus\u2019 Misunderstood Teachings on Divorce"},"content":{"rendered":"<!DOCTYPE html PUBLIC \"-\/\/W3C\/\/DTD HTML 4.0 Transitional\/\/EN\" \"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/TR\/REC-html40\/loose.dtd\">\n<html><head><meta http-equiv=\"content-type\" content=\"text\/html; charset=utf-8\"><meta http-equiv=\"content-type\" content=\"text\/html; charset=utf-8\"><\/head><body><p><i>Welcome readers! Please subscribe through the buttons on the right if you enjoy this post.<\/i><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-1956\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.patheos.com\/blogs\/sites\/1222\/2020\/02\/PDRHM.png\" alt=\"wedding rings\" width=\"580\" height=\"300\"><\/p>\n<p>People matter. I\u2019ve seen Jesus\u2019 teachings on divorce used to keep people in abusive relationships.<\/p>\n<p>In both Matthew\u2019s and Luke\u2019s gospels we read:<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBut I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, makes her the victim of adultery, and anyone who marries a divorced woman commits adultery.\u201d (Matthew 5:32)<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAnyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, and the man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery.\u201d (Luke 16:18)<\/p>\n<p>Christians taking Jesus\u2019 saying on divorce at face value have forced women to stay in untold situations of abuse. I want to argue this week that in the context of the 1st Century\u2019s economic realities for women in Roman and Jewish patriarchal society, and in the context of the debate between the Pharisaical schools of Shammai and Hillel on divorce, Jesus\u2019s saying about divorce did not <i>judge<\/i> women but was instead concerned with <i>social justice<\/i> for them.<\/p>\n<p>Let\u2019s unpack that a bit.<\/p>\n<p>First, within at least Jewish society at the time of Jesus, divorce was the prerogative of the man. The laws were patriarchal:<\/p>\n<p>Deuteronomy 22:13-18: \u201cIf a man takes a wife and, after sleeping with her, dislikes her and slanders her and gives her a bad name, saying, \u2018I married this woman, but when I approached her, I did not find proof of her virginity,\u2019 then the young woman\u2019s father and mother shall bring to the town elders at the gate proof that she was a virgin. Her father will say to the elders, \u2018I gave my daughter in marriage to this man, but he dislikes her. Now he has slandered her and said,\u00a0 \u201cI did not find your daughter to be a virgin.\u201d But here is the proof of my daughter\u2019s virginity.\u2019 Then her parents shall display the cloth before the elders of the town, and the elders shall take the man and punish him. They shall fine him a hundred shekels of silver and give them to the young woman\u2019s father, because this man has given an Israelite virgin a bad name. She shall continue to be his wife; he must not divorce her as long as he lives.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>This passage is disturbing for multiple reasons, but this week\u00a0 I\u2019d like to focus on the fact that reparation for the unjust slander in the text would be paid \u201cto the young woman\u2019s father.\u201d There is no reparation to the woman in that case and she would also have to remain married to her offender.<\/p>\n<p>Another disturbing example is found a few verses further on in Deuteronomy 22:<\/p>\n<p>Deuteronomy 22:23-24: \u201cIf a man happens to meet in a town a virgin pledged to be married and he sleeps with her, you shall take both of them to the gate of that town and stone them to death\u2014the young woman because she was in a town and did not scream for help, and the man because he violated another man\u2019s wife. You must purge the evil from among you.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Blaming the victim because \u201cshe didn\u2019t scream for help\u201d is sick. This law blames rape victims for their own rape. But also notice that the man is punished because he violated \u201canother man\u2019s wife.\u201d The crime is against the other man, not against the woman who is simply \u201canother man\u2019s wife.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>The last deeply disturbing example to consider is just a few more verses even further:<\/p>\n<p>Deuteronomy 22:28-29: \u201cIf a man happens to meet a virgin who is not pledged to be married and rapes her and they are discovered, he shall pay her father fifty shekels of silver. He must marry the young woman, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>This is sick on multiple levels, too! The victim of rape must marry her rapist, and without the option of divorce? Again the financial penalty is one that must be paid to the woman\u2019s \u201cfather.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Jesus\u2019s saying must be interpreted in light of a culture where a women had few rights. She could not send her husband away with a certificate of divorce; only men were allowed to do that.<\/p>\n<p>Also, the Torah\u2019s criteria for divorce was problematic.<\/p>\n<p>Deuteronomy 24:1-4: \u201cIf a man marries a woman who becomes displeasing to him because he finds something indecent about her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, and if after she leaves his house she becomes the wife of another man, and her second husband dislikes her and writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, or if he dies, then her first husband, who divorced her, is not allowed to marry her again after she has been defiled.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Notice that within the Torah, the only prerequisite for divorce was if the woman \u201cdispleased\u201d her husband in any way. Deuteronomy was at the heart of the debate between the Pharisaical schools of Shammai and Hillel. Hillel focused on the \u201cdispleasing\u201d portion of this text and stated that a man could send his wife away, giving her a certificate of divorce, for any reason if he was \u201cdispleased\u201d with her. Shammai, on the other hand, focused on the word \u201cindecent\u201d and said the permissible reason for a man to send his wife away was if <i>she<\/i> had committed an indecent act of infidelity, such as adultery. Notice that language. \u201cOnly if she\u201d did. His adultery was not addressed because until Hellenistic influence, only men could issue a certificate of divorce. So you have two arguing factions. One said a man could divorce a woman for any reason he chose. And the other sought to limit the justification for divorce only to adultery.<\/p>\n<p>Jesus and Hillel had so much in common in their teachings. Yes, Jesus and Hillel differed on the <a href=\"https:\/\/renewedheartministries.com\/Esights\/02-19-2016\" class=\" decorated-link\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow\">prozbul<\/a>. Jesus called for the year of Jubilee where all debts would be forgiven and accumulated wealth redistributed to the poor. But in most every other area, Jesus interpreted the Torah in much the same way as Hillel. In the case of divorce, however, Jesus rejected the school of Hillel and sided either in the gospel of Matthew with Shammai, or in the gospel of Mark, a more stringent rejection of divorce than even Shammai (and Moses as well for that matter) would have been comfortable with.<\/p>\n<p>Let\u2019s look at each.<\/p>\n<p>In Matthew, Jesus states that divorce in the Torah was a concession or an accommodation to male \u201chard-heartedness\u201d within patriarchal marriages. Reasons could include something as minor as \u201cfinding something objectionable or unpleasing\u201d about one\u2019s wife (see Deuteronomy 24:1). In Matthew, Jesus goes beyond Torah and limits the reasons for a husband to divorce his wife to only infidelity.<\/p>\n<p>Matthew 19:8-9: \u201cHe said to them, \u2018It was because you were so hard-hearted that Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for unchastity, and marries another commits adultery.\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n<p>In Mark, we find a Jesus that is even more strident than in Matthew. There is no justification of divorce here, and even the reason of \u201cinfidelity\u201d in Matthew is left out. \u201cWhoever divorces his wife,\u201d period.<\/p>\n<p>Mark 10:5-10: \u201cBut Jesus said to them, \u2018Because of your hardness of heart he wrote this commandment for you. But from the beginning of creation, \u201cGod made them male and female. For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.\u201d So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.\u201d In the house, the disciples ask Jesus again about this matter. He said to them, \u201cWhoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her; and if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.*\u201d[*Mark is believed to have been written for a gentile audience, and within Roman culture women could divorce men as is seen here. In first-century Judaism it remained that only men could serve a certificate of divorce to a woman.]\n<\/p><p>I would argue that in each of these examples we see a gospel authors who are living within the boundaries of their own Roman and Jewish patriarchal social order and marriage. Jesus\u2019 concern, within those constraints, is justice for women in a culture that disadvantages women, making women dependent on fathers and husbands for survival, with very few exceptions. In more egalitarian marriages, the principle would be the same: distributive justice for all parties involved.<\/p>\n<p>I come from a long history of divorce on both my mother\u2019s and my father\u2019s sides of the family. I am the son of both my mother\u2019s and father\u2019s second marriages. My mother would go on to be married a total of four times and my father, three. I grew up with my mother living despite a physically and emotionally abusive situation, afraid to leave because there had been no case of marital infidelity on her or husband\u2019s part. I see this as a gross misunderstanding of the cultural context of Jesus\u2019 words. In Jesus\u2019 culture, where Jesus speaks of divorce, we see a double standard where men didn\u2019t commit adultery against their wives, but only against the husbands of the married women they may have had sex with. If woman was unmarried, the man paid a penalty to the father of the woman (cf. Deuteronomy 22:29), but it was not labeled as adultery, even if the man himself was married. This was a culture whose adultery laws were written when men were permitted to have multiple wives, as long as the rights of fathers in those wives\u2019s lives were \u201crespected.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Jesus words in the gospels regarding divorce should not be shallowly interpreted and lifted out of their context to promote injustice and abuse toward women today. This would be to contradict the spirit of justice for women originally within those words.<\/p>\n<p>Nor should they be used today to support patriarchal marriage as an ideal for human society. Speaking of Jesus\u2019 words in the Temple debates (see Mark 12:24-27) where he unequivocally denounces patriarchal marriage as having a place in God\u2019s just future, Elizabeth Sch\u00fcssel Fiorenza writes in <i>In Memory of Her: A Feminist Theological Reconstruction of Christian Origins<\/i>:<\/p>\n<p>\u201c[Jesus is not claiming] that sexual differentiation and sexuality do not exist in the \u2018world\u2019 of God, but that \u2018patriarchal marriage is no more,\u2019 because its function in maintaining and continuing patriarchal economic and religious structures is no longer necessary . . . [Mark 12:26-27] replies directly to the question of the continuation of the patriarchal family: in the burning bush God is revealed to Moses as the God of promise given to the patriarchs and their posterity. The \u2018house\u2019 of Israel is not guaranteed in and through patriarchal marriage structures, but through the promise and faithfulness of Israel\u2019s powerful, life-giving God. While the God of the patriarchal systems and its securities is the \u2018God of the dead,\u2019 the God of Israel is the \u2018God of the living.\u2019 In God\u2019s world women and men no longer relate to each other in terms of patriarchal dominance and dependence, but as persons who live in the presence of the living God . . . The Sadducees have \u2018erred much\u2019 in assuming that the structures of patriarchy are unquestionably a dimension of God\u2019s world as well. So, too, all subsequent Christians have erred in maintaining oppressive patriarchal structures.\u201d (pp. 144-145)<\/p>\n<p>Today, I hear Jesus\u2019 words calling us to prioritize the vulnerable within our societies. Whether that vulnerability is rooted in discrimination based on race, ethnicity, gender, gender expression, gender identity, class, education, sexuality, ability, age, culture, language, and\/or religion, we are called to put people and their well-being first, even if that means we going against traditional and popular interpretations of our sacred texts. The passages above speak of women being more than disposable objects, easily discarded in consumer-style patriarchal marriages. People couldn\u2019t simply discard or trade wives based on legal loopholes in the Torah without acknowledging the damage done to the women involved. In Spirit, they call us to reject seeing anyone as a disposable means to our own pleasure and gratification. People matter.<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>In Spirit, Jesus&#8217; teachings on patriarchy and divorce call us to reject seeing anyone as a disposable means to our own pleasure and gratification. People matter.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4129,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[696,7,699],"tags":[2337,1056,242,2340,73,176,16,2346,504,1296,474,2349,19,13,2343,606,10,22,873,70,2352],"class_list":["post-1950","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-feminism","category-social-gospel","category-womanism","tag-a-preferential-option","tag-economic-justice","tag-equity","tag-esights","tag-feminism","tag-jesus","tag-liberation","tag-marriage","tag-mercy","tag-oppressed","tag-patriarchy","tag-relational-justice","tag-reparation","tag-resistance","tag-sayings-gospel-q-tagged-divorce","tag-solidarity","tag-survival","tag-transformation","tag-vulnerable","tag-womanism","tag-women"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v21.1 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>The Patriarchy, Justice, and Jesus&#039; Misunderstood Teachings on Divorce | Social Jesus<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"In Spirit, Jesus&#039; teachings on patriarchy and divorce call us to reject seeing anyone as a disposable means to our own pleasure and gratification. 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