{"id":1791,"date":"2009-07-16T07:34:00","date_gmt":"2009-07-16T07:34:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/standingonmyhead\/2009\/07\/the-vicar-writes-2\/"},"modified":"2014-12-24T10:39:01","modified_gmt":"2014-12-24T15:39:01","slug":"the-vicar-writes-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/standingonmyhead\/2009\/07\/the-vicar-writes-2.html","title":{"rendered":"The Vicar Writes"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

Guest blogger, The Rev\u2019d Humphrey Blytherington, Vicar of St Hilda\u2019s, Little Snoring and All Saints, Great Snoring, weighs in on Anglican issues.<\/span><\/p>\n


\n<\/span>\n
\n
I was enjoying a half pint of lager shandy down at the Goose and Garter the other evening after bell ringing practice, when Nigel, one of the lads said, \u201d \u2018ere, Vicar, wot\u2019s all this about the church needing more bishops? Aren\u2019t there too many already?\u201d\n
\u201cNigel is quite right\u201d, I explained, \u201cThe Church does need more bishops.\u201d<\/a><\/div>\n
\u201cBut they\u2019re all toffs, wot live in palaces and sit in the House of Lords ain\u2019t they?\u201d said Clive. \u201cYeh, I reckon the church needs less of them, not more.\u201d said another. \u201cDon\u2019t they all have servants and chauffeur driven cars?\u201d \u201cLoad of Oxbridge pansies!\u201d said another.<\/div>\n
Golly, it seemed like I had a little rebellion on my hands! So I took the opportunity to explain further.\u00a0I always enjoy these homely opportunities for evangelism. So good to reach out to those beneath one socially, and share a bit of the wisdom one has gathered through the years.<\/div>\n
\u201cNow lads, look here.\u201d I began, \u201cI\u2019m sure you don\u2019t really understand quite how demanding the bishop\u2019s job really is. First of all, he\u2019s got a jolly big house and garden to look after, and that\u2019s not an easy task at the best of times, especially when the house is likely to be hundreds of years old. A friend of mine from college became a bishop and he was telling me how impossible it was to live in a palace. The heating was virtually non existent and the butler was incompetent. He said when the grandchildren came round and rode bikes in the Great Hall the echo was deafening.<\/div>\n
Then a bishop has got an awful lot of sherry parties to attend. You may well chortle at such things, but that\u2019s where he meets important people like the town mayor, and helps to get things done. Then there\u2019s the confirmations. Why only last summer the Bishop came to our deanery and confirmed six young people, and after the confirmation he\u2019s got to eat cake and drink tea and have photographs taken. Jolly exhausting I\u2019d say! Then there\u2019s one meeting after another about things like the archdeacon\u2019s report on sex education for Church of England schools. You wouldn\u2019t believe how busy a bishop\u2019s day is, and when that\u2019s all done he\u2019s lucky to have a moment to spare for Mrs. Bishop, who\u2019s waiting to talk about her day organizing the cathedral flower guild or to ask him about the choice of curtains for the ballroom or the proper color of paint to redecorate the Abbot\u2019s Library.<\/div>\n
The bishops I know are exhausted by it all. I suppose, as usual, the Yanks have got the answer. They\u2019ve cut straight to the point and are trying their hardest to have more pansies ordained<\/a> as bishops. It\u2019s not my cup of tea, and Mrs. Vicar is incensed by the move, but I can see the sense of it. Lavinia, the curate over at St Ethedreda\u2019s says it\u2019s a matter of equal rights. She thinks the church has discriminated against women and homosexual chaps for too long.<\/div>\n
She\u2019s a bit strident at times, our Lavinia, but I can see her point. It\u2019s not really Christian to be unkind to someone just because they have different opinions about this or that. For my part I can see some practical advantages to the Yanks proposals for more bishops of that sort. A man like that will be able to reach out to all the folks who are that way inclined, and a chap who hasn\u2019t got family responsibilities has got more time for the demanding work of being a bishop. Furthermore, when it comes to home management, he\u2019s not likely to need any help deciding about curtains and paint colors, or what sort of china is necessary for the banqueting hall.<\/div>\n
When I explained this to the lads, one of them said, \u201cHalf of them are pooftahs already, so wot\u2019s the big problem?\u201d I tend to agree, but it seems the more traditional members of our flock are up in arms over the whole business and they\u2019re splitting off to make their own church. Honestly, such behavior is simply exasperating! Why go off in a huff over something so unimportant? What on earth does it matter to the Almighty what a chap does in his bedroom? It\u2019s not like the fellows are hurting anyone.<\/div>\n
I can understand somebody leaving their church if a vicar introduces foreign Roman style worship with incense and processions of statues and prayers for the Pope in Rome and so forth, but to leave just because a chap likes the lads and not the ladies seems a bit silly.<\/div>\n
The fellows down at the Goose and Garter didn\u2019t see eye to eye with me on that one, I\u2019m afraid, but then they\u2019re not especially well educated. They\u2019re good lads, but I suppose one can\u2019t expect them to be as enlightened in these matters as one might like.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Guest blogger, The Rev\u2019d Humphrey Blytherington, Vicar of St Hilda\u2019s, Little Snoring and All Saints, Great Snoring, weighs in on Anglican issues. I was enjoying a half pint of lager shandy down at the Goose and Garter the other evening after bell ringing practice, when Nigel, one of the lads said, \u201d \u2018ere, Vicar, wot\u2019s […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":557,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[93],"tags":[4,21,94],"class_list":["post-1791","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-the-vicar","tag-alter-egos","tag-anglicans","tag-humor"],"yoast_head":"\nThe Vicar Writes<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Guest blogger, The Rev'd Humphrey Blytherington, Vicar of St Hilda's, Little Snoring and All Saints, Great Snoring, weighs in on Anglican issues. 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