{"id":7676,"date":"2013-01-05T09:52:21","date_gmt":"2013-01-05T14:52:21","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/standingonmyhead\/?p=7676"},"modified":"2014-12-26T19:59:09","modified_gmt":"2014-12-27T00:59:09","slug":"the-vicar-on-gay-bishops","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/standingonmyhead\/2013\/01\/the-vicar-on-gay-bishops.html","title":{"rendered":"The Vicar on Gay Bishops"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

\u00a0<\/p>\n

Guest blogger, The Rev\u2019d Humphrey Blytherington is Vicar of St Hilda\u2019s, Little Snoring with All Saints, Great Snoring. He is a graduate of Plymouth University. He completed his studies for the ministry at Latimer Hall, Durham. He is married to Daphne and enjoys home brewing, model railroading and is an avid member of the Great Snoring Morris Dancers.<\/em><\/p>\n

I was happily ensconced in the armchair in my study meditating for a few moments, when Daphne marched in clutching the Daily Telegraph. \u201cWake up Humphrey. Listen to this!\u201d<\/p>\n

The article<\/a>\u00a0she read indicates that the dear old C of E has decided that it\u2019s quite all right after all for a pansy to be a bishop. When she finished her harangue I mentioned that it did seem a bit queer. At that point she who must be obeyed, gave me her famous withering look. \u201cIt\u2019s more than a bit queer Humph\u201d she said, \u201cIt\u2019s queer through and through. Did you know one of the bishops in America left his wife to go with a young man? I believe he even calls himself \u2018Vicky\u2019. And a Bishop! It\u2019s outrageous! We\u2019re having none of it in the Catholic Church I can tell you.\u201d<\/p>\n

I was a bit displeased with her I must say. Saying there is none of that sort of thing in the Catholic Church is a bit rum. I know most of their priests are hearty Irish farm boys, but I expect the Romans have their fair share of the \u201clove that dare not speak its name.\u201d I must confess, I have never really understood why everyone is in such a kerfuffle about the whole business. When I was a lad at boarding school everyone knew that there were some fellows who were that way inclined. Most of them grew out of it or went into the theater or became Anglo Catholics\u2026much the same thing I suppose.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s a funny old business, and I\u2019m not one to condemn another person. Why, I remember when I was at University a rather weedy lad with pimples named Nigel Proudie fell for me. He wanted to go for long walks and read poetry, but I had the cure for him. We went out on the lawn and worked up a good sweat playing croquet. He soon got over his infatuation and married the archdeacon\u2019s daughter. Sadly it didn\u2019t last, but today Mrs. Proudie runs a Bed and Breakfast establishment in Bath, and Nigel is precentor of Crumpington Cathedral and lives in a nice little house in the close with his good friend Kevin.<\/p>\n

You might be tempted to condemn Nigel, but I\u2019ve learned not to. You remember what Our Lord said? \u201cLet him who never made a mistake cast the first stone?\u201d and \u201cLive and Let Live\u201d. Life\u2019s too short to go stomping about condemning other people, I mean to say, as it says somewhere in Scripture, \u00a0if we went along with \u201can eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth\u201d business the whole world would be blind and toothless, so I can\u2019t be condemning these fellows just because they have more of an eye for the laddies than the ladies.<\/p>\n

As I say, they\u2019ve always been there. What they never did, if they were well brought up, was to trumpet it about. It was nobody\u2019s business really, and you never imagined that they actually\u00a0did<\/em> anything about it. I mean to say, that\u2019s not really very nice is it? People were much more discreet in those days. Certain things were not mentioned in polite society. Now everything has to be out in the open. Very disagreeable to my mind. To that end, I suppose Daff does have a point. Better to keep it undercover\u2026.as it were.<\/p>\n

In fact, I was never really sure what<\/em> they did with one another. Didn\u2019t like to let my mind go along those paths\u2026 but at the clergy luncheon not too long ago Lavinia went into some detail. I must say I was rather shocked. Made me choke on my cheese and pickle sandwich.<\/p>\n

Now the bishops say fellows who are in a civil partnership thingy can be bishops after all. Funny thing is, \u00a0the article said they\u2019ve got to have separate bedrooms. I\u2019m afraid they haven\u2019t pleased anyone really. When Lavinia heard the news she and her friend Georgie Samsonite were outraged. Said it was blatant hypocrisy and homophobia. Daff said poor Lavinia was \u201cfueled by rage.\u201d I like that. \u201cFueled by rage.\u201d Still, I can\u2019t think that they\u2019ll be able to enforce such a rule. What next? Archdeacons doing midnight raids on the Bishop\u2019s Palace to make sure everyone is safely in their own bed?<\/p>\n

Never mind. I expect it will all blow over. Most things do. If the bishops have made the decision we\u2019ll have to go along with it. It\u2019s not really my cup of tea, but as long as they don\u2019t make it mandatory, \u00a0I can\u2019t see it does much harm.<\/p>\n

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>Go here<\/a>\u00a0or check out the right sidebar to purchase the first full length short story featuring Humph and his pals. Read the adventure of how he and Daphne ended up in Great Snoring. It\u2019s available as an e-book for Kindle or as a download. Price: $2.99 ($1.99 for direct download) You can also read the archived posts by the Vicar by using the \u2018categories\u2019 facility located in the right sidebar of the blog.<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u00a0 Guest blogger, The Rev\u2019d Humphrey Blytherington is Vicar of St Hilda\u2019s, Little Snoring with All Saints, Great Snoring. He is a graduate of Plymouth University. He completed his studies for the ministry at Latimer Hall, Durham. He is married to Daphne and enjoys home brewing, model railroading and is an avid member of the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":557,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[93],"tags":[4,21,94],"class_list":["post-7676","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-the-vicar","tag-alter-egos","tag-anglicans","tag-humor"],"yoast_head":"\nThe Vicar on Gay Bishops<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"  Guest blogger, The Rev\u2019d Humphrey Blytherington is Vicar of St Hilda\u2019s, Little Snoring with All Saints, Great Snoring. 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