Listening Carefully<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"People tell me that I am a good listener.\u00a0 I think what they mean is that I pay attention, I try not to get distracted. \u00a0I have had people tell me that I\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/strategicmonk\/2011\/08\/18\/listening-carefully\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Listening Carefully\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"People tell me that I am a good listener.\u00a0 I think what they mean is that I pay attention, I try not to get distracted. \u00a0I have had people tell me that I\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/strategicmonk\/2011\/08\/18\/listening-carefully\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Strategic Monk\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2011-08-18T12:09:35+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/wp.production.patheos.com\/blogs\/strategicmonk\/files\/2011\/08\/5104330822_4b5de25842.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Greg Richardson\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Greg Richardson\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"2 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/strategicmonk\/2011\/08\/18\/listening-carefully\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/strategicmonk\/2011\/08\/18\/listening-carefully\/\",\"name\":\"Listening Carefully\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/strategicmonk\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2011-08-18T12:09:35+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2011-08-18T12:09:35+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/strategicmonk\/#\/schema\/person\/0b0eb7359880aab2bcad8122aed09b72\"},\"description\":\"People tell me that I am a good listener.\u00a0 I think what they mean is that I pay attention, I try not to get distracted. \u00a0I have had people tell me that I\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/strategicmonk\/2011\/08\/18\/listening-carefully\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/strategicmonk\/2011\/08\/18\/listening-carefully\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/strategicmonk\/2011\/08\/18\/listening-carefully\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/strategicmonk\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Listening Carefully\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/strategicmonk\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/strategicmonk\/\",\"name\":\"Strategic Monk\",\"description\":\"Discerning. 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{"id":891,"date":"2011-08-18T05:09:35","date_gmt":"2011-08-18T12:09:35","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/strategicmonk.com\/?p=891"},"modified":"2011-08-18T05:09:35","modified_gmt":"2011-08-18T12:09:35","slug":"listening-carefully","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/strategicmonk\/2011\/08\/18\/listening-carefully\/","title":{"rendered":"Listening Carefully"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

$\"\"$ <\/a><\/p>\n

Some people think that \u201clistening\u201d is waiting for the person who is talking to take a breath so they can interrupt them.\u00a0 Listening is their opportunity to think of what they want to say next.<\/p>\n

I used to understand \u201clistening\u201d as giving people the opportunity to answer the questions I asked them; often so they could incriminate themselves.\u00a0 I was paying attention to their words, trying to find inconsistencies or weak spots I could use against them.\u00a0 That was particularly, but not only, true when I was arguing against them in court.<\/p>\n

Listening carefully can be very challenging.\u00a0 There are almost always things to distract us. \u00a0We live in a time when silence is scarce.\u00a0 Loud noises, music in the background, other conversations, sights and scents that demand our attention, the need for rest; all these things and more call our attention away from listening.<\/p>\n

For me, the most distracting things come from within myself.\u00a0 Someone tells me something that triggers a memory, a strong feeling; I can relate to them well, or not at all.\u00a0 Something they say reminds me that I need to do something, call someone, go somewhere; I want to remember, but I also want to remain present to them.<\/p>\n

That is a lot of what listening is; being present to someone in the moment.\u00a0 it is, in many ways, the opposite of waiting for them to finish talking, or guiding them strategically to where I want them to go.\u00a0 Listening is about being myself in the present, not the past or the future.<\/p>\n

The first words in the Prologue to Saint Benedict\u2019s Rule, which governs many monastic communities and was written about sixteen hundred years ago, \u00a0are \u201cListen carefully.\u201d<\/p>\n

How will you listen carefully to someone today?<\/p>\n

Image by [MattHurst<\/a>] <\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"