![\"communication-banner\"](\"https:\/\/wp-media.patheos.com\/blogs\/sites\/654\/2017\/11\/communication-banner.jpg\")
I don\u2019t remember everything that comes out of my mouth in ritual, particularly Hekate at the Crossroads<\/a>, after it\u2019s all been said and done.<\/p>\nI know there tends to be some screaming and other vocalizations alongside a fluid river of words.\u00a0 I\u2019m relatively soft-spoken in person, with an aversion to singing (unless I\u2019m alone in the car) and being loud in general. I remember the screaming because\u00a0always somewhat of a\u00a0shock to me.\u00a0 (That I also manage to do it without wrecking my voice is another surprise.)\u00a0<\/em>Nothing is rehearsed or memorized \u2013 so while there may be a consistent message, the details can vary significantly depending on who\u2019s in the room.<\/p>\n I recall the words more when people come up to me afterwards and tell me what affected them.\u00a0 What words made the experience profound or powerful for them.\u00a0 After the ritual in New Orleans at the Alombrados O.T.O<\/a>., several different people came up to me to share what struck them most.\u00a0 It centered around something that went like this:<\/p>\n \u201cLook at each other.\u00a0 Look into that person\u2019s eyes. See them. Acknowledge them. Recognize them. You are not alone.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n I remember people circling the room, looking into each other\u2019s faces. The temple was a cauldron of stirring energy as people flowed in both directions, making eye contact, nodding, sometimes smiling, faces relaxing. Perfect strangers being open in a shared space, making new connections in the flesh.<\/p>\n It struck me how amazing that something so seemingly simple, could be so powerful and profound.\u00a0\u00a0<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n It\u2019s something we\u2019re often desperately lacking into today\u2019s society. Remembering that there is a physical body and a spirit on the other side of a screen or phone, or even directly in front of us. We\u2019re often failing at the very thing that helped evolve our brains:\u00a0communication.<\/p>\n Most of us will say we\u2019re fairly proficient in writing and talking. But communication isn\u2019t just about writing and\/or talking to or at someone.\u00a0 Nope. Rather, communication is about the\u00a0with<\/em>\u00a0factor.\u00a0 We don\u2019t converse\u00a0AT\u00a0someone.\u00a0 We\u00a0enter<\/em>\u00a0into conversation WITH them.<\/a>\u00a0 Which means you must be willing to engage fully \u2013 to listen or read their response, then consider and comprehend it before replying.<\/p>\n To make it worse, we often avoid eye-contact in person, unconsciously avoiding\u00a0to break out of our shells.\u00a0 Afraid someone may try to sell us something or ask something of us, or be put in an awkward conversation.\u00a0 True that does happen from time to time, but in our avoidance of the awkward, we isolate ourselves and each other. We get stuck in our own heads, often making ourselves (and others) feel more alone than we truly are. This spirals down further to failure to recognize commonality, that the other is not so different, that the other is us.\u00a0 Collectively, we all lose power when we fail to acknowledge, engage, and recognize each other.<\/p>\n Communication does seem like a pretty simple thing, but there\u2019s a reason why I consider it\u00a0an uncommon trait and vital for Witchcraft<\/a>.\u00a0 To work magick, we can\u2019t just live in our own heads \u2013 we need to interact with the world and each other.\u00a0 We must\u00a0understand flow<\/a>, movement, and reaction \u2013 and consider other viewpoints and possibilities.\u00a0 It can sound difficult to talk with the gods, but I think it\u2019s much harder to talk with each other.<\/p>\n This may all sound terribly abstract to you, so let me put it in the form of\u00a0some concrete examples.<\/p>\n Example: Commenting without reading the post or article.<\/strong><\/em> Example: Talking to everyone BUT the person you have an issue with or a question about.\u00a0<\/strong><\/em> Example: Calling someone out online in a public manner about a personal or private issue.<\/strong><\/em> What does communication have to do with Witchcraft? It\u2019s about an exchange of energy and intention.\u00a0 If we are to be effective Witches, then we must not waste energy that could be used for actual work.\u00a0 We don\u2019t demand power from others \u2013 we own our own and come by it naturally.\u00a0 We don\u2019t have to threaten others to gain what we think to be respect \u2013 when we know a mutual exchange of communication fosters loads more respect with far less effort.<\/p>\n![\"Etching](\"https:\/\/wp-media.patheos.com\/blogs\/sites\/654\/2017\/11\/witchendor.jpg\")
\nThe other week, I was astounded when one of my posts on the Patheos Pagan Facebook page<\/a> had a slew of comments \u2013 that largely showed people actually read the freaking article.\u00a0 Why? Because that\u2019s an anomaly of Star Trek<\/em> proportions.\u00a0 Far too often it\u2019s a bunch of folks responding to the title, image, or excerpt prompt (which is designed to get folks to get interested enough to read the article.), which gets really embarrassing IMHO.\u00a0 (Not for me, but for the sake of those clearly commenting without reading). The communication breakdown here is that people are adding input without considering, listening, or thinking. It\u2019s a bit like the bored toddler who goes \u201cmommy, mom, mommy, MOM!\u201d in the hopes that mom will pay attention to them, while mom is busy having an important conversation.\u00a0 I wonder if folks actually spent more time recognizing the people around them and their own validity, if we\u2019d all be a lot better off.<\/p>\n
\n\u201cWhy is so-and-so person friends with X person on Facebook?\u201d\u00a0 \u201cWhy did that person do\/write\/say that thing?\u201d \u2013 You know the best way to find out? Talk to them directly.\u00a0 If you sincerely care and it actually *concerns you* and IS your business (versus NOT), then have the ovaries to talk directly to that person (unless obviously it\u2019s a matter of security\/harm). Otherwise it probably isn\u2019t any of your business and no one owes you an explanation.<\/p>\n
\nIs it your goal to cause drama or stir up a wasp nest? Or do you sincerely want to address an issue and solve it respectfully? If it\u2019s the latter,\u00a0 avoid\u00a0the dramallama<\/a>\u00a0by reaching out to them in person, directly first.\u00a0 Demonstrate responsible communication.\u00a0 Again, if you truly care and it actually involves you, bring up the level of respect by being direct, personal, face to face \u2013 not a theatrical show for anyone stopping by to rubberneck.\u00a0 Sure there\u2019s power in raising a storm, but there\u2019s even more power in breaking it down.<\/p>\n