{"id":22034,"date":"2010-10-01T11:08:00","date_gmt":"2010-10-01T15:08:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.firstthings.com\/blogs\/theanchoress\/?p=22034"},"modified":"2017-03-09T22:10:54","modified_gmt":"2017-03-09T22:10:54","slug":"coat-hanger-capershut-up-witness","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/theanchoress\/2010\/10\/01\/coat-hanger-capershut-up-witness\/","title":{"rendered":"Coat Hanger Caper;&quot;Shut up, Witness.&quot;"},"content":{"rendered":"<!DOCTYPE html PUBLIC \"-\/\/W3C\/\/DTD HTML 4.0 Transitional\/\/EN\" \"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/TR\/REC-html40\/loose.dtd\">\n<html><head><meta http-equiv=\"content-type\" content=\"text\/html; charset=utf-8\"><meta http-equiv=\"content-type\" content=\"text\/html; charset=utf-8\"><\/head><body><p><strong>It\u2019s 2002, In a UK Courtroom<\/strong>, and a man is being tried for <a href=\"http:\/\/www.independent.co.uk\/opinion\/columnists\/miles-kington\/high-court-hangups-747313.html\" class=\" decorated-link\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow\">stealing 40,000 hotel coat hangers<\/a> and Joseph Heller could not have written a more entertaining transcript!<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>\n<strong>Counsel:<\/strong> What is your name?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Chrysler:<\/strong> Chrysler. Arnold Chrysler.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Counsel:<\/strong> Is that your own name?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Chrysler:<\/strong> Whose name do you think it is?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Counsel:<\/strong> I am just asking if it is your name.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Chrysler:<\/strong> And I have just told you it is. Why do you doubt it?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Counsel:<\/strong> It is not unknown for people to give a false name in court.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Chrysler:<\/strong> Which court?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Counsel:<\/strong> This court.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Chrysler:<\/strong> What is the name of this court?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Counsel:<\/strong> This is No 5 Court.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Chrysler:<\/strong> No, that is the number of this court. What is the name of this court?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Counsel:<\/strong> It is quite immaterial what the name of this court is!<\/p>\n<p><strong>Chrysler:<\/strong> Then perhaps it is immaterial if Chrysler is really my name.<\/p>\n<p>Counsel: No, not really, you see because\u2026<\/p>\n<p>Judge: Mr Lovelace?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Counsel:<\/strong> Yes, m\u2019lud?<\/p>\n<p>Judge: I think Mr Chrysler is running rings round you already. I would try a new line of attack if I were you.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Counsel:<\/strong> Thank you, m\u2019lud.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>You\u2019ll want to read it all.  H\/T <a href=\"http:\/\/twitter.com\/gabrielmalor\/status\/26086254019\" class=\" decorated-link\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow\">Gabriel Malor\u2019s Twitter Feed<\/a><\/p>\n<p><strong>UPDATE:<\/strong>  Well, dammit, it\u2019s <a href=\"http:\/\/97bravo.livejournal.com\/91107.html\" class=\" decorated-link\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow\">too good to be true!<\/a>.  But that doesn\u2019t keep it from being brilliant.  And I guess Joseph Heller could write it! :-)  A case of working too fast and wanting to believe! That\u2019s okay, I wear my eggs well!<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>It\u2019s 2002, In a UK Courtroom, and a man is being tried for stealing 40,000 hotel coat hangers and Joseph Heller could not have written a more entertaining transcript! Counsel: What is your name? Chrysler: Chrysler. Arnold Chrysler. Counsel: Is that your own name? Chrysler: Whose name do you think it is? Counsel: I am [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":112,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[275],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-22034","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-why-cant-weeee-be"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v21.1 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Coat Hanger Caper;&quot;Shut up, Witness.&quot;<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"It&#039;s 2002, In a UK Courtroom, and a man is being tried for stealing 40,000 hotel coat hangers and Joseph Heller could not have written a more entertaining\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/theanchoress\/2010\/10\/01\/coat-hanger-capershut-up-witness\/\" 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