{"id":10227,"date":"2013-06-16T21:05:04","date_gmt":"2013-06-17T01:05:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/thecrescat\/?p=10227"},"modified":"2017-01-26T18:55:02","modified_gmt":"2017-01-26T23:55:02","slug":"happy-fathers-day-mom","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/thecrescat\/2013\/06\/happy-fathers-day-mom.html","title":{"rendered":"Happy Father’s Day, Mom…"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

\u2026 If you are tempted to send me something like, please don\u2019t. <\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

The sentiment is appreciated but I\u2019m not a father and I can never do a father\u2019s work. You hear this all time, mother\u2019s being mom and dad. No, they\u2019re just mothers working hard to raise their kids the best they can in the absence of an immediate father figure. They don\u2019t replace fathers or do their work. Father\u2019s day is father\u2019s day, not single or divorced mother\u2019s day. <\/p>\n

I wrote a little about this in the past. It\u2019s just not physically possible to be both parents at the same time. It\u2019s also confusing and damaging to your kids to pretend so<\/a>. <\/p>\n

Another temptation single mothers have is to dismiss the importance of fathers all together. They feel it will lessen the sting of rejection if they tell their child, \u201cIt\u2019s ok Daddy\u2019s not around. We don\u2019t need him.\u201d<\/p>\n

Now think about that. If you have a son you are raising him to believe that being a father is not an important vocation. Will this son grow up to value the role of father in his own marriage? Will this son, should fatherhood be thrust upon him through unplanned circumstances, be compelled to step up and assume a role he\u2019s been told all his life is unimportant? No. You can blame the perpetual cycle of fatherless children on men, or you can examine the mother\u2019s negative attitude toward men that has been ingrained into her children.<\/p>\n

And if you have a daughter what respect for men are you instilling in her if she\u2019s repeatedly told her daddy\u2019s not important. The last thing this world needs is more man hating feminists.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

I implore you, single mothers, please don\u2019t be tempted to ignore this day or use it to nurse old bitter hurts. Never tell a child without a father that it doesn\u2019t matter, it\u2019s ok, or that you are better off. It does matter to your child and when you say these appeasing things, even with best intentions, all your child hears is that their feelings of rejection are unimportant and not valid. <\/p>\n

So what to do instead? Honor other fathers in your life. Grandfathers, uncles, priests, and most importantly emphasize God the Father \u2013 the One that never leaves or abandons. Stress to your children, especially your sons, how important fatherhood is and ask them to pray for theirs whether they are around or not. <\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u2026 If you are tempted to send me something like, please don\u2019t. The sentiment is appreciated but I\u2019m not a father and I can never do a father\u2019s work. You hear this all time, mother\u2019s being mom and dad. No, they\u2019re just mothers working hard to raise their kids the best they can in the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":78,"featured_media":10229,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[27],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-10227","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-parenting"],"yoast_head":"\nHappy Father's Day, Mom...<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"... If you are tempted to send me something like, please don't. The sentiment is appreciated but I'm not a father and I can never do a father's work. 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