{"id":18494,"date":"2015-04-07T22:38:49","date_gmt":"2015-04-08T02:38:49","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/admin.patheos.com\/blogs\/thecrescat\/?p=18494"},"modified":"2015-04-07T22:44:27","modified_gmt":"2015-04-08T02:44:27","slug":"happy-easter-yall","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/thecrescat\/2015\/04\/happy-easter-yall.html","title":{"rendered":"Happy Easter y&#8217;all&#8230;"},"content":{"rendered":"<!DOCTYPE html PUBLIC \"-\/\/W3C\/\/DTD HTML 4.0 Transitional\/\/EN\" \"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/TR\/REC-html40\/loose.dtd\">\n<html><head><meta http-equiv=\"content-type\" content=\"text\/html; charset=utf-8\"><meta http-equiv=\"content-type\" content=\"text\/html; charset=utf-8\"><\/head><body><p>\u2026 My Easter gift to you all. Because I am a giver. <\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" width=\"560\" height=\"315\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/4KtN2IDGYl8?rel=0\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-media.patheos.com\/blogs\/sites\/66\/2015\/04\/get-it-out-of-my-eyes-and-ears.png\" class=\" decorated-link\" target=\"_blank\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.patheos.com\/blogs\/sites\/66\/2015\/04\/get-it-out-of-my-eyes-and-ears-300x205.png\" alt=\"get it out of my eyes and ears\" width=\"300\" height=\"205\" class=\"alignnone size-medium wp-image-18495\"><\/a><\/p>\n<p>There was a time when I seriously considered moving to Seattle. Emphasis on <em>was<\/em>. <\/p>\n<p>I know, I know. Easter mass is long, and crowded, and you have to park miles away and get there an hour early to camp out in the pews because of the Chreasters. But just know, somewhere in Seattle someone suffered infinitely more. <\/p>\n<p>They should be giving out <a href=\"http:\/\/www.celebtricity.com\/couple-arrested-for-selling-tickets-to-heaven\/\" class=\" decorated-link\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow\">golden tickets to heaven<\/a> for making it through that liturgy.  <\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>\u2026 My Easter gift to you all. Because I am a giver. There was a time when I seriously considered moving to Seattle. Emphasis on was. I know, I know. Easter mass is long, and crowded, and you have to park miles away and get there an hour early to camp out in the pews [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":78,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[59,253,401,16],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-18494","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-bat-shit-crazy","category-easter","category-is-outrage","category-mass-hysteria"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v21.1 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Happy Easter y&#039;all...<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"... My Easter gift to you all. Because I am a giver. There was a time when I seriously considered moving to Seattle. Emphasis on was. I know, I know.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/thecrescat\/2015\/04\/happy-easter-yall.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Happy Easter y&#039;all...\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"... My Easter gift to you all. Because I am a giver. There was a time when I seriously considered moving to Seattle. Emphasis on was. 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