{"id":5443,"date":"2012-04-13T12:59:11","date_gmt":"2012-04-13T16:59:11","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/thecrescat\/?p=5443"},"modified":"2017-01-26T19:03:09","modified_gmt":"2017-01-27T00:03:09","slug":"friday-funny-3","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/thecrescat\/2012\/04\/friday-funny-3.html","title":{"rendered":"Friday Funny…"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

\u2026 and Another Priest Weighs in Against Blessing Kids<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Kids. Can\u2019t stand \u2018em. Monsters of ego, every one. You know how you can tell a kid from a leech? That\u2019s a trick question: you can\u2019t. Well, actually, you can. If a leech gets hold of you, you can burn it off with a Bic lighter. Try that with a kid, and sure as you\u2019re born, the little bastard will scream and cry like a Templar at the stake. Then he\u2019ll tell his parents and you\u2019ll get a nasty letter from your vicar general.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

So, I take it upon myself, as a pastor and catechist, to strip these little maggots of any illusions about the world, specifically, about their own significance in it. Whenever one tells me, \u201cGood morning, Father,\u201d I\u2019ll ask, \u201cWhat have you done for me lately?\u201d Or I\u2019ll say, \u201cYou want it to be a good morning? Wash my car. That\u2019d be good.\u201d And then, to drive home the point \u2014 because, God knows, this is an ignorant generation \u2014 I\u2019ll flip the bird.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

I think it\u2019s a shame that bullying\u2019s gotten such a bad name lately. It\u2019s a useful practice. First, it serves as a sop for kids\u2019 ambient annoyingness; every hour that kids spend picking on each other is an hour they don\u2019t spend bothering me. Second, it teaches kids deference to people bigger than themselves, which may be the only hedge against complete anarchy.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u2026 and Another Priest Weighs in Against Blessing Kids. Kids. Can\u2019t stand \u2018em. Monsters of ego, every one. You know how you can tell a kid from a leech? That\u2019s a trick question: you can\u2019t. Well, actually, you can. If a leech gets hold of you, you can burn it off with a Bic lighter. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":78,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[59],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5443","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-bat-shit-crazy"],"yoast_head":"\nFriday Funny...<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"... and Another Priest Weighs in Against Blessing Kids. Kids. Can\u2019t stand \u2018em. Monsters of ego, every one. 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