{"id":1003,"date":"2015-04-01T09:37:38","date_gmt":"2015-04-01T15:37:38","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/admin.patheos.com\/blogs\/theprinciplesofspiritualliving\/?p=1003"},"modified":"2015-04-01T09:37:38","modified_gmt":"2015-04-01T15:37:38","slug":"changing-others","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/theprinciplesofspiritualliving\/2015\/04\/changing-others\/","title":{"rendered":"Changing Others"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

\u201cJust who do you think you are to tell God what to do?!?\u201d<\/p>\n

That\u2019s the response I got from a spiritual counselor years ago when I was detailing to her all the ways my lover at the time needed to change to have the life he deserved. \u201cWhat makes you think what he\u2019s going through isn\u2019t allowing him to grow in ways you can\u2019t imagine?\u201d<\/p>\n

Dang. I just wanted her agreement to help me help him get off his butt and get a job. Sheesh!<\/p>\n

You cannot have a relationship with someone\u2019s potential.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

If only my life didn\u2019t reflect my inability to comprehend, apply and appreciate those words above all the times I wish I had\u2026 particularly since I\u2019m the one who said it. Most annoying!<\/p>\n

If only she\u2019d stop drinking.\u201d \u201cIf only he\u2019d stop smoking.\u201d \u201cIf only my kids would apply themselves.\u201d If only\u2026<\/p>\n

If only we could let the people around us be who they are and love them unconditionally like we often say we do! Yes, yes, I know. You only want them to change or realize their potential because they will be happier, more productive and achieve\u00a0greater fulfilment in life.<\/p>\n

Really?<\/p>\n

\"HPIM1865\"<\/a>
Dillon, our coach potato<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

We may couch our need to change others with reasons such as I just mentioned. But more often than not we find the actions (or the lack of actions) of others, particularly those people closest to us, to be embarrassing, infuriating or completely unacceptable to our better judgment. Well, ain\u2019t that just too bad!<\/p>\n

There\u2019s also another egoistic benefit of deciding what others should do: \u00a0If we\u2019re fixing others then our time is usually too occupied to take care of our own lives.<\/p>\n

If we see someone about to be hit by a bus we should probably intervene. Just seems like the right thing to do, right? But if s\/he wants to keep smoking, eat unhealthy, fattening food or stay in a relationship that\u2019s going nowhere, what business is it of ours? Here\u2019s a thought:\u00a0 Instead of trying to change others into what we think they should be, how about if we live the life WE were meant to live and be the example for others to consider for themselves?<\/p>\n

It was a wise man who said people don\u2019t want to hear a sermon. They want to see results. What if we stopped preaching to our loved ones and friends about how they should change? What if we were willing to have our own life show them what it means to be magnificent?<\/p>\n

In Spirit, Truth and Playfulness,<\/p>\n

Terry<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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