{"id":2312,"date":"2010-02-11T21:19:34","date_gmt":"2010-02-11T21:19:34","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/owenstrachan.com\/?p=2312"},"modified":"2010-02-11T21:19:34","modified_gmt":"2010-02-11T21:19:34","slug":"are-you-dating-a-narcissist-how-to-spot-narcissistic-personality-disorder","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/thoughtlife\/2010\/02\/are-you-dating-a-narcissist-how-to-spot-narcissistic-personality-disorder\/","title":{"rendered":"Are You Dating a Narcissist? How to Spot “Narcissistic Personality Disorder”"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

\"\"<\/a>This just in\u2013you may be dating a narcissist.\u00a0 So said Chicago Tribune writer Heidi Stevens in her piece \u201cAre You Dating a Narcissist?\u201d<\/a>.<\/p>\n

\u201cNarcissism is an epidemic in our society,\u201d argues Lisa Scott, author of \u201cIt\u2019s All About Him: How to Identify and Avoid the Narcissist Male Before You Get Hurt<\/a>\u201d ( CFI, 2009). \u201cOur culture breeds it.\u201d<\/p>\n

Here are the nine signs that signal a person has fallen prey to \u201cNarcissistic Personality Disorder\u201d (you can\u2019t make this stuff up).\u00a0 The American Psychological Association<\/a> has identified these:<\/p>\n

\u2022Feels grandiose and self-important for reasons not supported by reality<\/p>\n

\u2022Obsesses with fantasies about unlimited success, fame, power or omnipotence<\/p>\n

\u2022Believes he\/she is unique and special and can be understood by and associate with only other unique or high-status people<\/p>\n

\u2022Requires excessive admiration, adulation, attention and affirmation<\/p>\n

\u2022Feels a sense of entitlement<\/p>\n

\u2022Exploits others without guilt or remorse<\/p>\n

\u2022Is devoid of empathy<\/p>\n

\u2022Tends to be envious of others or believes others are envious of him\/her<\/p>\n

\u2022Displays arrogant and haughty behavior<\/p>\n

The biggest red flag, Scott says, is lack of empathy.<\/p>\n

Here\u2019s one hilarious testimony from an NPD survivor:<\/p>\n

\u201cMy ex-husband and I were seeing a therapist, and she met with me privately and said, \u2018He has NPD. The only thing we can do is continue meeting like this, and I can give him ways he should treat you, but he\u2019ll never be able to do it on his own,'\u201d Scott recalls. \u201cThey don\u2019t comprehend that other people have feelings, and they never will.\u201d<\/p>\n

This is one of the funniest pieces I\u2019ve read in a while<\/a>.\u00a0 There is now a formal psychological diagnosis for narcissism, which is nothing other than the greatest human sin\u2013pride\u2013parading itself before others.\u00a0 You have to love the therapist\u2013\u201cthe only thing we can do is continue meeting like this\u201d.\u00a0 Won\u2019t hurt, of course, that this exclusive form of redress comes to the tune of hundreds and probably thousands of dollars.\u00a0 How shocking to see the bottom line pop up in such a conversation.<\/p>\n

On a more serious note, how maddening is it to see our society continue its transition from a theological foundation to a psychological one?\u00a0 It seems clear that pastors need to be reading modern psychologists, because these folks are some of the only ones in a postmodern world beside ministers who are tackling character issues.\u00a0 Of course, they are radically relabeling them and divesting them of spiritual content.<\/p>\n

With that said, we might point out that narcissism does seem to be an epidemic these days.\u00a0 On a constant basis, people think about themselves, whine about their lives, speak loudly in public places to call attention to themselves, throw themselves at the merest opportunity to get \u201cfame\u201d, broadcast the details of their daily lives like mini-celebrities, and dress and act in garish ways to draw attention.<\/p>\n

Many of us have NPD, it seems, and the only cure can\u2019t be found in a therapist\u2019s chair.\u00a0 We very much need wise pastors and biblical counselors to help our people to see that their narcissism is a matter of not loving Christ enough, not a mere quirk of their makeup.<\/p>\n

By the way, does anyone else want to see Carl Trueman<\/a> tackle this one?<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

This just in\u2013you may be dating a narcissist.\u00a0 So said Chicago Tribune writer Heidi Stevens in her piece \u201cAre You Dating a Narcissist?\u201d. \u201cNarcissism is an epidemic in our society,\u201d argues Lisa Scott, author of \u201cIt\u2019s All About Him: How to Identify and Avoid the Narcissist Male Before You Get Hurt\u201d ( CFI, 2009). \u201cOur […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1217,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[264],"tags":[478,13080,781,1514,1615,2120],"class_list":["post-2312","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-psychology","tag-american-psychological-association","tag-carl-trueman","tag-chicago-tribune","tag-heidi-stevens","tag-its-all-about-him","tag-narcissistic-personality-disorder"],"yoast_head":"\nAre You Dating a Narcissist? 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