It is a sight that British vicars fear more than an empty collection plate.<\/p>\n\n
The business card is deposited anonymously with the loose bills and change at the offertory. It states: \u201cYou have been visited by the Mystery Worshipper.\u201d This means a detailed review of their church will soon be posted for all the world to see at the humor site www.Ship-of-Fools.com.<\/p>\n\n
Were the pews comfortable? Was the service \u201cstiff-upper-lip, happy-clappy, or what?\u201d How was the preaching, on a scale of 10? Was the coffee good? Did any part of the service offer a glimpse of heaven? How about a whiff of \u201cthe other place?\u201d<\/p>\n\n
Mystery Worshippers have, during the past six years, slipped unannounced into 750 pews in England, North America and, occasionally, more exotic locales.<\/p>\n\n
On the pop side of the aisle, one critic in Ohio survived a Christianized version of the racy Ricky Martin hit \u201cLivin\u2019 La Vida Loca\u201d \u2014 at Easter. Video clips from \u201cThe Matrix\u201d spiced up the service.<\/p>\n\n
Meanwhile, the incense swingers at St. John Chrysostom in Manchester, England, received top marks: \u201cThe thurifer was superb and was of the standard that made even the most complex of swings and twirls look smooth and effortless. \u2026 I have to say that more perfume and less fog would be my personal taste.\u201d Ah, but the wine was thin.<\/p>\n\n
Ship of Fools has corned the market on truth-is-stranger-than-fiction ecclesiastical silliness \u2014 from \u201cSigns and Blunders\u201d to the \u201cFruitcake Zone.\u201d<\/p>\n\n
Recent offerings in the \u201cGadgets for God\u201d pages \u2014 real items sold elsewhere \u2014 included boxer shorts covered with crosses, but with the fly sewn shut. Other links yielded bobble-head dolls of the Blessed Virgin Mary and flashing cell-phone crucifix covers. In one \u201cchurch organists behaving badly\u201d report, a Scottish musician was caught playing \u201cSend in the Clowns\u201d as the elders processed. A Brooklyn organist snuck a few bars of \u201cRoll Out the Barrel\u201d into the funeral of a popular pub patron.<\/p>\n\n
But the long-running \u201cMystery Worshipper\u201d feature is a clue that the site has a serious side, said editor Simon Jenkins. The goal is to reach out to \u201cpeople on the fringes\u201d who are either fleeing the church or just starting the process of investigating the faith. Almost everyone knows what it is like to be a stranger in a pew.<\/p>\n\n
\u201cThere is no shortage of Mystery Worshippers,\u201d Jenkins said, during a U.S. speaking tour that included a stop last week at the National Religious Broadcasters convention in Charlotte, N.C.<\/p>\n\n
\u201cI think one reason so many people volunteer to do this is that everyone can identify with the whole process of visiting a new church. Church shopping is such a pain and it kind of helps to laugh. We know what people are going through.\u201d<\/p>\n\n
For many Mystery Worshippers the most challenging part of the review process is its requirement that they test the degree to which each church welcomes strangers. The instructions are clear. At the end of the service, they are asked to stand alone in the back of the church for five minutes \u2014 looking sad and lonely. The goal is to count the number of people who approach them to chat.<\/p>\n\n
Nearly 50 percent of the time, the answer is \u201czero.\u201d<\/p>\n\n
\u201cClergy dread this part of our reports,\u201d said Jenkins. \u201cIt is sad to have to see the church like that. But it can be good, too. \u2026 Like it or not, this is a chance to see what their churches really look like to those who are on the outside.\u201d<\/p>\n\n
Year after year, the \u201cfriendliness factor\u201d is the bad news. The good news, said co-editor Steve Goddard, is that the online form\u2019s request for \u201cheavenly moments\u201d in worship almost always leads to results.<\/p>\n\n
This is not a matter of old churches vs. new, or big vs. small.<\/p>\n\n
\u201cI think the good news is that there are genuinely spine-tingling moments of spirituality happening in pews out there,\u201d said Goddard. \u201cIt doesn\u2019t matter if it\u2019s a smells-and-bells church or a rock-the-flock church. We get reports from people who find a sense of worship in all kinds of places.<\/p>\n\n
\u201cWhat matters is genuine reverence and a sense that people are truly seeking the presence of God. That\u2019s what the Mystery Worshippers are looking for.\u201d<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
It is a sight that British vicars fear more than an empty collection plate. The business card is deposited anonymously with the loose bills and change at the offertory. It states: \u201cYou have been visited by the Mystery Worshipper.\u201d This means a detailed review of their church will soon be posted for all the world […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":610,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[60,142,214,444,932],"class_list":["post-1268","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-anglicans","tag-britain","tag-church-growth","tag-humor","tag-world-wide-web"],"yoast_head":"\n