{"id":1346,"date":"2011-12-25T10:49:50","date_gmt":"2011-12-25T15:49:50","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/?p=1346"},"modified":"2012-11-30T11:19:27","modified_gmt":"2012-11-30T16:19:27","slug":"7-christmas-traditions","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/2011\/12\/7-christmas-traditions.html","title":{"rendered":"7 Christmas Traditions"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

\"\"<\/a>
Tevye doesn\u2019t appreciate headlining this post<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<\/p>

\u2014 1 \u2014<\/strong><\/p>\n

Hullo all and Merry Christmas! \u00a0I\u2019m home with my family, looking forward to Chinese food and a movie. \u00a0It seemed like a fun time to share some\u00a0traditions\u00a0of my atheist family Christmas.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

<\/a>\u2014 2 \u2014<\/strong><\/p>\n

On Christmas Eve, some folks read \u201cTwas the Night before Christmas\u201d aloud as a family. \u00a0At my parents\u2019 house, we read David Sedaris\u2019s Santaland Diaries<\/a><\/em> (his essay about his job as an elf in Macy\u2019s Christmas wonderland). \u00a0We pass the book along in turns, or when someone is laughing too hard to keep reading.<\/p>\n

The full text of that essay isn\u2019t online, so let me link you instead to \u201cSix to Eight Black Men<\/a>\u201d which is also by Sedaris. \u00a0Here\u2019s part of what he learns about Amsterdam\u2019s Christmas lore:<\/p>\n

I learned that Saint Nicholas travels with what was consistently described as \u201csix to eight black men.\u201d I asked several Dutch people to narrow it down, but none of them could give me an exact number. It was always \u201csix to eight,\u201d which seems strange, seeing as they\u2019ve had hundreds of years to get a decent count.<\/p>\n

The six to eight black men were characterized as personal slaves until the mid-fifties, when the political climate changed and it was decided that instead of being slaves they were just good friends. I think history has proven that something usually comes between slavery and friendship, a period of time marked not by cookies and quiet times beside the fire but by bloodshed and mutual hostility. They have such violence in Holland, but rather than duking it out among themselves, Santa and his former slaves decided to take it out on the public. In the early years, if a child was naughty, Saint Nicholas and the six to eight black men would beat him with what Oscar described as \u201cthe small branch of a tree.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cA switch?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes,\u201d he said. \u201cThat\u2019s it. They\u2019d kick him and beat him with a switch. Then, if the youngster was really bad, they\u2019d put him in a sack and take him back to Spain.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/a>\u2014 3 \u2014<\/strong><\/p>\n

We have two traditional Christmas movies (besides the one in a movie theatre on Christmas day). \u00a0The first is Muppet Christmas Carol. \u00a0And I couldn\u2019t bring myself to pick only one song, so I\u2019ve embedded the number that introduces Scrooge and <\/em>the one that features\u00a0Statler and Waldorf as the Marley brothers delivering their dread warning.<\/p>\nhttp:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=KBthi_An5qQ<\/a>\nhttp:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=_RUth7EX-eo&feature=related<\/a>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

\u2014 4 \u2014<\/strong><\/p>\n

The second is Mrs. Santa Claus, which stars Angela Lansbury. \u00a0In this one, Santa\u2019s wife takes a visit to turn of the century New York City and ends up stranded for a few weeks. \u00a0While she\u2019s there, she gets involved in a slowdown in a factory using child labor and marches in a sufragette protest. \u00a0Ah, liberal Christmas! \u00a0Here\u2019s the\u00a0villainous\u00a0owner of the factory:<\/p>\nhttp:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=hQfOo9wYBB4<\/a>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

<\/a>\u2014 5 \u2014<\/strong><\/p>\n

But the best part of the Christmas season at my house is cookie making. \u00a0The trouble is, after many years of this tradition, some of the standards (stockings, ornaments, etc) feel a little hackneyed. \u00a0So then I branch out into things like a single-celled\u00a0organism:<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>
with nucleus, mitochondria, rough and smooth endoplasmic reticulum, and lysosomes!<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Or a giraffe that has smallpox (and is sad about it):<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Or a zombie moose:<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Or this<\/em>:<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

<\/a>\u2014 6 \u2014<\/strong><\/p>\n

And on to a slightly more traditional<\/em> tradition: my favorite Christmas carol is hands down \u201cO Holy Night.\u201d \u00a0I like that it sounds like what it is; I like belting the \u201cFall to your knees\u201d chorus. \u00a0It\u2019s got much more feeling than all the Rudolphs or general winter songs.<\/p>\n

<\/a>\u2014 7 \u2014<\/strong><\/p>\n

Finally, this isn\u2019t strictly speaking a Christmas tradition, but it should be one for everyone. \u00a0If you\u2019ve not seen the ever-hilarious Hyperbole and a Half<\/a>, check out the seasonally appropriate \u201cThe Year Kenny Loggins Ruined Christmas<\/a>\u201d in which a family Christmas pageant goes awry:<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Keep reading at Hyperbole and a Half<\/a> and have a holly jolly etc!<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u2014 1 \u2014 Hullo all and Merry Christmas! \u00a0I\u2019m home with my family, looking forward to Chinese food and a movie. \u00a0It seemed like a fun time to share some\u00a0traditions\u00a0of my atheist family Christmas. \u2014 2 \u2014 On Christmas Eve, some folks read \u201cTwas the Night before Christmas\u201d aloud as a family. \u00a0At my parents\u2019 […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":127,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[17],"tags":[129],"class_list":["post-1346","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-7-quick-takes","tag-christmas"],"yoast_head":"\n7 Christmas Traditions<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"--- 1 --- Hullo all and Merry Christmas! \u00a0I'm home with my family, looking forward to Chinese food and a movie. \u00a0It seemed like a fun time to share\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/2011\/12\/7-christmas-traditions.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"7 Christmas Traditions\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"--- 1 --- Hullo all and Merry Christmas! \u00a0I'm home with my family, looking forward to Chinese food and a movie. \u00a0It seemed like a fun time to share\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/2011\/12\/7-christmas-traditions.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Unequally Yoked\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2011-12-25T15:49:50+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2012-11-30T16:19:27+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/wp.patheos.com.s3.amazonaws.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/files\/2011\/12\/tradition.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Leah Libresco\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Leah Libresco\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"4 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/2011\/12\/7-christmas-traditions.html\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/2011\/12\/7-christmas-traditions.html\",\"name\":\"7 Christmas Traditions\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2011-12-25T15:49:50+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2012-11-30T16:19:27+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/#\/schema\/person\/17ee17592b35b40040d5f5f7ea5ab464\"},\"description\":\"--- 1 --- Hullo all and Merry Christmas! \u00a0I'm home with my family, looking forward to Chinese food and a movie. \u00a0It seemed like a fun time to share\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/2011\/12\/7-christmas-traditions.html#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/2011\/12\/7-christmas-traditions.html\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/2011\/12\/7-christmas-traditions.html#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"7 Christmas Traditions\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/\",\"name\":\"Unequally Yoked\",\"description\":\"\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":\"required name=search_term_string\"}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/#\/schema\/person\/17ee17592b35b40040d5f5f7ea5ab464\",\"name\":\"Leah Libresco\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/20e1e6a3a94c4e7928687804a41d888d?s=96&d=mm&r=r\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/20e1e6a3a94c4e7928687804a41d888d?s=96&d=mm&r=r\",\"caption\":\"Leah Libresco\"},\"description\":\"Leah is the author of Arriving at Amen and Building the Benedict Option. Her further writing can be found at leahlibresco.com.\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/author\/leahlibresco\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"7 Christmas Traditions","description":"--- 1 --- Hullo all and Merry Christmas! \u00a0I'm home with my family, looking forward to Chinese food and a movie. \u00a0It seemed like a fun time to share","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/2011\/12\/7-christmas-traditions.html","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"7 Christmas Traditions","og_description":"--- 1 --- Hullo all and Merry Christmas! \u00a0I'm home with my family, looking forward to Chinese food and a movie. \u00a0It seemed like a fun time to share","og_url":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/2011\/12\/7-christmas-traditions.html","og_site_name":"Unequally Yoked","article_published_time":"2011-12-25T15:49:50+00:00","article_modified_time":"2012-11-30T16:19:27+00:00","og_image":[{"url":"http:\/\/wp.patheos.com.s3.amazonaws.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/files\/2011\/12\/tradition.jpg"}],"author":"Leah Libresco","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"Leah Libresco","Est. reading time":"4 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/2011\/12\/7-christmas-traditions.html","url":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/2011\/12\/7-christmas-traditions.html","name":"7 Christmas Traditions","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/#website"},"datePublished":"2011-12-25T15:49:50+00:00","dateModified":"2012-11-30T16:19:27+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/#\/schema\/person\/17ee17592b35b40040d5f5f7ea5ab464"},"description":"--- 1 --- Hullo all and Merry Christmas! \u00a0I'm home with my family, looking forward to Chinese food and a movie. \u00a0It seemed like a fun time to share","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/2011\/12\/7-christmas-traditions.html#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/2011\/12\/7-christmas-traditions.html"]}]},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/2011\/12\/7-christmas-traditions.html#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"7 Christmas Traditions"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/","name":"Unequally Yoked","description":"","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":"required name=search_term_string"}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/#\/schema\/person\/17ee17592b35b40040d5f5f7ea5ab464","name":"Leah Libresco","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/20e1e6a3a94c4e7928687804a41d888d?s=96&d=mm&r=r","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/20e1e6a3a94c4e7928687804a41d888d?s=96&d=mm&r=r","caption":"Leah Libresco"},"description":"Leah is the author of Arriving at Amen and Building the Benedict Option. Her further writing can be found at leahlibresco.com.","url":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/author\/leahlibresco"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1346","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/127"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1346"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1346\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1346"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1346"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1346"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}