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<\/a><\/div>\nLooking through the comments thread for \u201cSoup Nazi Approach to Sex<\/a>\u201d it looks like there were two major subtypes of disagreement with my post. Many commenters wanted to know why men should bear responsibility for a pregnancy when women can make unilateral decisions about whether to bring a child to term. They accused me of enforcing a sexist double standard. I\u2019ll try and get to that topic tomorrow.What I want to address today is the way we conceive of responsibility and culpability for both genders. I saw a lot of comments along these lines:<\/p>\n Let\u2019s take this out of the realm of pregnancy for a second (to avoid some of the abortion side-arguments) and reframe the discussion in terms of STIs. Both people in a relationship can take action to lower their risk of contracting a venereal disease (screening partners, using condoms, getting vaccinated), but something can still go wrong. (Especially when a significant proportion of people<\/a> who think they\u2019re using condoms correctly are wrong).<\/p>\n Someone can contract a disease, even when they and their partner were doing due diligence, because someone has to get hit with the nasty end of the probability stick. So, in that instance, there\u2019s not really any culpability or blame. Not any more so than if you tripped and skinned your knee. However, even though neither partner is at fault<\/em>, the infection will carry with it a new burden of responsibility<\/em>.<\/p>\n Best case scenario, the infected partner now has a responsibility<\/em> to him\/herself to go to a doctor and get treated with a short course of antibiotics to clear the problems up completely. Worst case scenario, in the case of HIV\/AIDS, the person now has a chronic disease that they will be responsible<\/em> for managing for the rest of his\/her life. Any chronic infection also entails a new responsibility<\/em> to inform and protect future partners. None of these new responsibilities have anything to do with desert, they exist regardless of the action that brought someone to this point.<\/p>\n\n
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\n\u2026Anyway, I think the question is a lot more complicated than you want it to be, and your answer makes you sound like a pro-lifer, except you are placing the burden of not having sex on men instead of women.\u201d\u00a0[2]<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n
\nLeah, you have to realize that you are, in fact, making the exact argument pro-lifers make for why abortion should be illegal: if you don\u2019t want the responsibility of a kid (or the burden of a pregnancy) then don\u2019t have sex. The reasons that\u2019s a wrongheaded statement to make to a woman are the same as those why it\u2019s wrong to say to a man.\u201d [3]<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n