{"id":2959,"date":"2012-05-02T13:37:21","date_gmt":"2012-05-02T17:37:21","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/?p=2959"},"modified":"2013-01-03T14:41:40","modified_gmt":"2013-01-03T19:41:40","slug":"winning-a-moral-arms-race","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/2012\/05\/winning-a-moral-arms-race.html","title":{"rendered":"Winning a Moral Arms Race?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

\"\"<\/p>\n

The first person to comment on my post about The Hunger Games<\/em> and not seeing gifts as debts<\/a> had a pragmatic concern<\/a>:<\/p>\n

I don\u2019t see this as moral progress. If more people would see a sacrifice as a debt the world would be a better place.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

I\u2019ve got a (richly deserved) reputation as a not-so-soft paternalist when it comes to social policy, so I\u2019m sympathetic to this critique. \u00a0Isn\u2019t there a benefit to chafing under a debt insofar as it spurs us on to better acts? \u00a0How is this kind of inducement different from picturing someone observing you when you act, imagining how you\u2019d feel about someone else taking the act you\u2019re considering, or some other exercise you take to build up your moral muscle?<\/p>\n

I think the main difference is that we live in a culture where debt is shameful, and, therefore, it\u2019s hard to be in debt to someone without resentment. \u00a0(I\u2019d be curious about how this dynamic would play out in a culture that had a radically different approach to indebtedness, i.e. one that actually practiced a regular Jubilee where all debts were forgiven<\/a>).<\/p>\n

But, in the world where we live, we want to escape from debt as swiftly as possible. \u00a0The commenter\u2019s question is premised on this fact: we urgently want to escape from obligation to another person. \u00a0And that\u2019s the attitude I\u2019m wary of encouraging in anyone, but especially in me<\/a>.<\/p>\n

If you\u2019ve \u2018won\u2019 in the debt-as-spur world, you don\u2019t owe anyone anything. \u00a0You get a Successfully Atomized Existence plaque or something. \u00a0And you\u2019re likely to look askance at someone trying to do a nice thing for you; you don\u2019t want to be entrapped now that you\u2019re finally, radically free. \u00a0When this attitude crops up in gift economies<\/a>, it really does look like an arms race, where people beggar themselves in order to humiliate their neighbors through\u00a0generosity.<\/p>\n

But even if you could secure a gift-giving non-aggression pact, and even if you didn\u2019t live in fear that someone was going to sneak-attack be too nice to you, this attitude would still end up pernicious and unsustainable. \u00a0It\u2019s a brute fact that we come into the world with debts we cannot repay. \u00a0The most obvious one is our debt to our parents (and Christians would presumably add our dependence on God). \u00a0It would be poisonous to resent our parents for their love or to chafe under their generosity. \u00a0We need a different way of talking about gifts and sacrifice.<\/p>\n

\n

\"\"
Oh, no! I\u2019ll need to take out the trash for a week to restore balance after all this unasked for affection!<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<\/p>

We can\u2019t try to discharge debts or want to be free of our dependence on others. \u00a0The way I try to curb these thoughts is to remember how happy it makes me to be of use to someone else and then to be glad that my friend can be similarly happy by being of help to me. \u00a0I shouldn\u2019t spoil it by worrying about the good deeds score between us. \u00a0(Before all my offline friends jump into the combox, yes, I know I am still terrible at this).<\/p>\n

And anyway, my duty to others isn\u2019t something I could ever be free of, even if I had slacker friends or no friends at all. \u00a0I\u2019m still called to forge my character and refine my conscience no matter which way the ledgers stand right now. \u00a0If I have any obligation, it\u2019s an absolute<\/em> obligation. \u00a0My\u00a0responsibility\u00a0to others isn\u2019t something I can work off or live up to, it\u2019s a law that I\u2019m as subject to as I am to gravity.<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The first person to comment on my post about The Hunger Games and not seeing gifts as debts had a pragmatic concern: I don\u2019t see this as moral progress. If more people would see a sacrifice as a debt the world would be a better place. I\u2019ve got a (richly deserved) reputation as a not-so-soft […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":127,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[48],"tags":[162,39,86,132],"class_list":["post-2959","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-morality-in-practice","tag-accepting-gifts","tag-freedom-means-choosing-a-master","tag-inculcating-morality","tag-pride"],"yoast_head":"\nWinning a Moral Arms Race?<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"The first person to comment on my post about The Hunger Games and not seeing gifts as debts had a pragmatic concern: I don\u2019t see this as moral progress.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/2012\/05\/winning-a-moral-arms-race.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Winning a Moral Arms Race?\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"The first person to comment on my post about The Hunger Games and not seeing gifts as debts had a pragmatic concern: I don\u2019t see this as moral progress.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/2012\/05\/winning-a-moral-arms-race.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Unequally Yoked\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2012-05-02T17:37:21+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2013-01-03T19:41:40+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/media.the-leaky-cauldron.org\/gallery\/books\/chapterArt\/_book1\/normal_ss_chp02.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Leah Libresco\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Leah Libresco\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/2012\/05\/winning-a-moral-arms-race.html\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/2012\/05\/winning-a-moral-arms-race.html\",\"name\":\"Winning a Moral Arms Race?\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2012-05-02T17:37:21+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2013-01-03T19:41:40+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/#\/schema\/person\/17ee17592b35b40040d5f5f7ea5ab464\"},\"description\":\"The first person to comment on my post about The Hunger Games and not seeing gifts as debts had a pragmatic concern: I don\u2019t see this as moral progress.\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/2012\/05\/winning-a-moral-arms-race.html#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/2012\/05\/winning-a-moral-arms-race.html\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/2012\/05\/winning-a-moral-arms-race.html#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Winning a Moral Arms Race?\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/\",\"name\":\"Unequally Yoked\",\"description\":\"\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":\"required name=search_term_string\"}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/#\/schema\/person\/17ee17592b35b40040d5f5f7ea5ab464\",\"name\":\"Leah Libresco\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/20e1e6a3a94c4e7928687804a41d888d?s=96&d=mm&r=r\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/20e1e6a3a94c4e7928687804a41d888d?s=96&d=mm&r=r\",\"caption\":\"Leah Libresco\"},\"description\":\"Leah is the author of Arriving at Amen and Building the Benedict Option. 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