{"id":496,"date":"2011-10-11T10:31:31","date_gmt":"2011-10-11T14:31:31","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/?p=496"},"modified":"2012-11-20T17:10:54","modified_gmt":"2012-11-20T22:10:54","slug":"coming-out-and-at-em","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/unequallyyoked\/2011\/10\/coming-out-and-at-em.html","title":{"rendered":"Coming Out (and at ’em)"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

(UPDATE: It looks like some of you have questions about bisexuality. \u00a0Feel free to ask them in the comments and I\u2019ll answer them in tomorrow\u2019s post)<\/strong><\/p>\n

Today is National Coming Out Day<\/a> (the link goes to Lambda Legal, not HRC, since Lambda puts donations to work on activism and HRC throws party for legislators without much to show for it). That makes today a good day to mention that I\u2019m bisexual to any new readers I\u2019ve picked up here at Patheos.<\/p>\n

I mention it because, when you write a blog about theological disputes you have with your Catholic boyfriend, it takes a deliberate effort to not pass for straight. I want to be out about my sexuality for the same reasons I\u2019m out about my atheism. In both cases, I\u2019m part of a small demographic, so, if I\u2019m not out and accessible, I lower the odds that people around me will know they know an atheist or a bisexual person. I don\u2019t want stereotypes to fester in silence, I want to be available for dialogue. (Though I\u2019m certainly not doing much to dispel any stereotypes of atheists as motormouths).<\/p>\n

In that spirit, I want to open up a conversation about gay marriage on two specific questions. You can bring up other LGBT-related things in the comments, but I can\u2019t guarantee I\u2019ll address them, since I want to keep the conversation focused.<\/p>\n

Question One<\/strong> is just a repeat of the question I asked in \u201cPut Your Money Where Your Marriage Is<\/a>.\u201d<\/p>\n

If you think the legalization of gay marriage will have severe negative effects, I want to hear from all of you about what specific data<\/em> you expect. Tell me how you\u2019ll make your beliefs pay rent<\/a>. One caveat: I don\u2019t want citations for research that\u2019s been conducted. That\u2019s going to derail everyone into methodological nitpicking. I want open ended brainstorming, not problems with anchoring effects and privileging the hypothesis.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

The same caveats apply as last time: its fine to claim as evidence events that liberals don\u2019t necessarily see as poor outcomes (increase in polyamory, more cohabitation, etc). All you have to do is explain what evidence you expect to see with enough detail that the prediction is testable. (So, \u201cI predict that more children will be born out of wedlock\u201d is better than \u201cChildren will be worse off\u201d). Let us know if you think a prediction reflects your true rejection<\/a> \u2013 if it doesn\u2019t come true, would you reconsider your opposition?<\/p>\n

But maybe your anticipated consequences don\u2019t fit into an empirical model (e.g. \u201cI predict more souls will go to Hell\u201d). \u00a0Fortunately, you (and everyone else) can still take a crack at\u2026<\/p>\n

Question Two<\/strong>: If you think gay marriage is a bad idea, is your justification accessible to people outside your faith?<\/p>\n

Some moral laws that religions promote seem like a good idea to pretty much everyone (e.g. \u201cThou shalt not kill\u201d). But others only make sense if you\u2019ve already accepted the basic premise of the religion. There\u2019s no good way to convince a secular Jew to keep kashrut unless you can convince them that there\u2019s a god who has chosen them and requires their obedience. So where on this spectrum would you put the gay marriage question?<\/p>\n

If you\u2019ve got it in the cloth-of-two-fabrics<\/a> category, I don\u2019t see that\u2019s there\u2019s any point in trying to sell heathens like me on the law before you\u2019ve gotten us on board with a Lawgiver. If you\u2019re more of a natural law type, perhaps you\u2019d like to write a guest post<\/a>.<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

(UPDATE: It looks like some of you have questions about bisexuality. \u00a0Feel free to ask them in the comments and I\u2019ll answer them in tomorrow\u2019s post) Today is National Coming Out Day (the link goes to Lambda Legal, not HRC, since Lambda puts donations to work on activism and HRC throws party for legislators without […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":127,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[85,11,12,10,93],"class_list":["post-496","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-gay-marriage","tag-lgbt","tag-making-beliefs-pay-rent","tag-no-war-but-culture-war","tag-open-questions"],"yoast_head":"\nComing Out (and at 'em)<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"(UPDATE: It looks like some of you have questions about bisexuality. \u00a0Feel free to ask them in the comments and I'll answer 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