Me (It made sense at the time I think):<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0 You have a head and therefore you are cute
\nAlicorn:<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0 Poofs are cute
\nMe:<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0 Sufficient, not necessary
\nAlicorn:<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0 Naked mole rats aren\u2019t cute
\nMe:<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0 They aren\u2019t? I know those star nosed ones aren\u2019t cute
\nAlicorn:<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0 Those are different but neither is cute
\nMe:<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0 Spiders have heads, but let us not think on that
\nAlicorn:<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0 I\u2019m thinking about spider heads now
\nMe:<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0 *shudders*
\nAlicorn:<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0 Spiders have heads. In their heads they have jaws, with which to bite you. You, personally.
\nMe:<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0 Aaaaaah
\nAlicorn:<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0 Also they have feet. To crawl on you. Again, you personally.
\n(Through much of the ensuing conversation Alicorn crawls her hands over my side in the manner of a largish spider)
\nMe:<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0 Yes, it is the teleology of every spider leg to crawl on Mike
\nAlicorn:<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0 Spiders that crawl on other surfaces are in violation of natural law!
\nMe:<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0 Deviants!
\nAlicorn:<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0 Eventually they will come to their senses and swarm upon you. Leah will approve and put spiders on you in order to increase their virtue. There will be little spider priests and they will hear confession from the spiders who have crawled on other surfaces. Obviously when you are covered in spiders I will not be able to see you \u2014 literally or figuratively.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"I\u2019m so pleased with the way in which my Catholic sensibilities were referenced in this conversation between two affianced friends of mine in California: Me (It made sense at the time I think):\u00a0\u00a0 You have a head and therefore you are cute Alicorn:\u00a0\u00a0 Poofs are cute Me:\u00a0\u00a0 Sufficient, not necessary Alicorn:\u00a0\u00a0 Naked mole rats aren\u2019t […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":127,"featured_media":8924,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-8922","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\n
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![\"\"](\"https:\/\/wp-media.patheos.com\/blogs\/sites\/84\/2014\/02\/jumping_spider_10_by_macrojunkie.jpg\" "\\"jumping_spider_10_by_macrojunkie\\"")
<\/a>