Am I just struggling or am I doing this wrong?
It is hard to know if we are in the right place, doing the right thing. Juggling dreams and responsibilities, we work ourselves into a frenzy. We are just trying to keep our heads above water.
But there is more to life. I know it. You know it. We know it. There is an itch we are dying to scratch. The Bible calls it ‘the fullness of life’. The keys to this kingdom are our values. Living in alignment with our deepest values is the only thing that brings meaning to life.
On the other hand, life is hard. Even a purpose-filled life has its ups and downs. Alignment with our values does not negate suffering and the need for perseverance.
So, how do we know if life is hard or bad? How do we know if we should stay the course or find a new one?
Here are 11 signs you might be living outside of your values and a change is in order.
Do you feel like one person at work and a completely different person at home? Sure we have to adapt to surroundings a bit, but here is the thing: your values follow you around. They are tethered to you. You are always who you are. Values are transcendent of circumstance and if you feel like your ‘true self’ in only one arena of life, it is a sign your other arenas are out of whack with your deepest self.
Nothing is easier than resenting authority. We love to blame. It is a self-preservation technique. Bosses can certainly be jerks, but take a step back and a deep breath. If you are unfairly resentful of those above you, it might be because you are blame-shifting discontent so that you don’t have to face the dissatisfying consequences of your own choices.
People who live in alignment to their values love to do what they do. If you are consumed with measuring others, it might be your values telling you that they are desperate for more. It is easier to compare the perceived-content in others than investigate what is of deepest value to us and pursue it for ourselves.
Life is tiring. There are respites we look forward to. But if you find yourself in an eternal countdown, you might be living outside your values. If peace, pleasure, and purpose are all in next month’s bonus or next year’s vacation or the tic of the clock at the end of the day, you are trying to escape life rather than living it. Life is here and now.