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<\/a>Avengers: Endgame<\/em> is here. Finally.<\/p>\n The Marvel Cinematic Universe has been building toward this moment for 11 years and 22 movies. And after the crushing cliffhanger of Avengers: Infinity War<\/a><\/em>, I\u2019ve been waiting for this movie like a 7-year-old kid waits for Christmas morning.<\/p>\n Avengers: Endgame<\/em> was just what I wanted to find underneath the tree.<\/p>\n I\u2019ve got lots to say about Endgame<\/em>, but I\u2019m not going to do it now\u2014not with so many of you still looking forward to watching the movie unspoiled. (I will make a couple of references to the movie, but I promise that\u2019s it.) Instead, as the cover closes on this<\/em> book of the Marvel Cinematic Universe, let\u2019s look at the MCU as a whole, and some of the surprisingly resonant messages we\u2019ve seen in all its many chapters.<\/p>\n So in honor of the MCU\u2019s 21 previous movies, here are 21 valuable lessons they\u2019ve given us. (Caution: While nothing in Endgame<\/em> will be spoiled here, some plot points in previous MCU movies will be.<\/p>\n 1. Being different is cool.<\/strong> Lots of kids may leave Marvel movies wondering what sort of superpowers they\u2019d want to have. And that\u2019s fair enough. But when you look at the MCU as a whole, it\u2019s really about how our differences not only make us who we are, but they make us special<\/em>. And that\u2019s a great encouragement to those of us who never quite fit in at school. Maybe Tony Stark was studying quantum physics while the other guys were playing football. Maybe while other girls were dreaming of their prom dates, Carol Danvers was dreaming of flying fighter jets. Rocket Raccoon may not be thrilled about, y\u2019know, being an overgrown rodent. But that didn\u2019t stop him from becoming a hero. The MCU reminds us that it\u2019s not just the world\u2019s chiseled wunderkind that can do great things (I\u2019m looking at you, Thor). If we use the gifts that God gave us, we too can become heroes. But \u2026<\/p>\n 2. Sure, individuality\u2019s great. But community\u2019s crucial.<\/strong> \u201cI work alone.\u201d How often have we heard or seen a variation of this in the Marvel movies? Thor doesn\u2019t fancy joining the Avengers at first. Gamora is horrified by the folks who become the Guardians of the Galaxy. \u201cI\u2019m going to die surrounded by the biggest idiots in the galaxy,\u201d she says. Really, more than half the heroes we meet are moody loners\u2014all of them quite sure that any \u201chelp\u201d would just get in their way. We know better, of course. Only by becoming a team do these superheroes stand a chance against their most powerful enemies. And the most touching illustration is maybe the climax of Guardians of the Galaxy<\/em>, where a bunch of ragtag galactic outcasts join hands to stop a planet\u2019s destruction. But those critical communities never form unless you \u2026<\/p>\n 3. Embrace each other\u2019s differences.<\/strong> I think it\u2019s pretty interesting how often the armies our superheroes face are, essentially, faceless themselves: the Chitauri legions from The Avengers<\/a><\/em>. The cookie-cutter robots from Avengers: Age of Ultron<\/a><\/em>. The zombie warriors from Thor: Ragnarok<\/a><\/em>. In contrast, we look at the good guys who fight them, see their diversity and we understand that their power comes from the fact that they all have different strengths. It\u2019s pretty strange, then, how so often when we look for real-life communities of our own, we look for people who think and act as much like us as possible.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n 4. Hard work pays off.<\/strong> Woody Allen famously said that 80 percent of life is just showing up. But let\u2019s face it: Woody Allen isn\u2019t exactly Avengers material. Sure, showing up to do battle with evildoers is a big deal\u2014but when you\u2019re facing an enemy like Thanos, preparation, training and lots of hard work is key. Take a look at Steve Rogers\u2019 Captain America<\/a>, for instance. He worked insanely hard before he was chemically gifted with his superhuman abilities. And in The Avengers<\/em>, he continues to train relentlessly to keep that bod in shape. Stark is always working to improve his Iron Man suit. Gamora\u2019s skills were honed through years of training. Even though Natasha Romanoff (Black Widow) and Clint Barton (Hawkeye) are both quite mortal, they\u2019ve developed their skills to the point where they, too, can be considered superheroes. And in Avengers: Endgame, the team\u2019s rematch with Thanos is paved not through luck or magic or brute strength, but a lot of overtime.<\/p>\n 5. People aren\u2019t always who they seem.<\/strong> This cuts both ways in the MCU, and I\u2019m a little surprised to see how often this theme comes into play. Maybe the first time our superhero narrative innocence was stripped away was in Captain America: Winter Soldier<\/em>, where we learn that SHIELD was being manipulated by a bunch of bad guys. Iron Man 3<\/em> features a controversial villain switcheroo, where the movie\u2019s big bad Mandarin turns out to be an out-of-work actor. In Captain Marvel<\/em>\u2014a movie that fittingly features the shape-shifting Skrull\u2014almost no one is quite who they seem, right down to the housecat Goose. These movies remind us that people can deceive. We need to be aware of that and, as the Bible suggests, not just as innocent as doves, but as shrewd as snakes.<\/p>\n 6. Be humble.<\/strong> This may seem like a strange virtue to slap on a superhuman do-gooder, but Marvel movies return to this theme often. Most of our heroes, when they get a little too big for their super-britches, are cut down a size or two. Iron Man\u2019<\/a>s a good example, but even a better one is found in Thor. Our titular hero begins his journey as an arrogant prettyboy\u2014a tailor-made villain for any John Hughes movie you\u2019d care to mention. His dad (Odin) strips him of his powers and banishes him in the hopes the lad will eat some crow and build some character. And sure enough, he does. Truth be told, being a hero\u2014or, simply, a good person\u2014isn\u2019t about being great. It\u2019s about serving others and, in so doing, serving something (or Someone) greater.<\/p>\n 7. It\u2019s not our successes that make us who we are; it\u2019s our hardships.<\/strong> Thor\u2019s humility\u2014and thus his path to heroism\u2014is rooted in this truth. But you could say the same about practically every hero on the Avengers docket. Captain America didn\u2019t magically become a hero when science gave him his muscles: That heroism was inside him already\u2014heroism that grew from all the trials and challenges he faced when he was a scrawny afterthought. And speaking of captains, we could say the same thing about Captain Marvel<\/a>, too. Her movie stresses the number of times she fell in the face of adversity \u2026 and the number of times she stood up again. No pain no gain, right? But pain isn\u2019t always so positive.<\/p>\n 8. Our suffering can twist us.<\/strong> I think of Helmut Zemo, the rather mousy mastermind behind the events of Captain America: Civil War<\/a><\/em>. He fractures the Avengers because he holds the heroes responsible for the death of his family. I think of Black Panther\u2019<\/em>s Erik Killmonger, who lost his own father\u2014a loss that, in part, spurred him on to take revenge on the world. We even see that same hurt in our heroes. Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2<\/a><\/em> was, in part, a study of how Rocket often pushes away the folks who care for him the most \u2026 and why. He\u2019s hardly alone. Many of the characters, both good and bad, have hidden hurts, and it shapes how they think and act. It reminds me to be a little more understanding of those who hurt us, even intentionally. And it reminds me, also, of the following point.<\/p>\n 9. Never give up on those you love.<\/strong> Now, I\u2019m sure that many a counselor would tell me that some relationships are just toxic. Sometimes we need to cut someone loose for our own health. But I\u2019d like to think that we should be as generous as we can be with our family and friends as we can be\u2014because sometimes we can turn a relationship around. No MCU relationship illustrates this more powerfully than that of Gamora and Nebula, Thanos\u2019 two lethal adopted daughters. Through her own suffering (see above), Nebula learned to hate her sister and\u2014as she admits in Endgame<\/em>\u2014tried to kill her several times. But Gamora ultimately returned all that hate with compassion, and that generosity wound up turning their relationship around. \u201cWe became friends,\u201d Gamora says. \u201cSisters.\u201d It\u2019s not the only time we see a relationship redeemed through patience and love in the MCU.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n 10. Your parents aren\u2019t perfect, but they are important.<\/strong> I\u2019ve written before about how important fathers are<\/a> to the dynamics of the MCU: Nebula and Gamora\u2019s relationship with daddy Thanos is far from the only, or even best, example. And we see\u2014perhaps through Tony Stark especially\u2014how those imperfect relationships can drive a person in healthy and unhealthy ways. T\u2019Challa, too, must come to terms with the legacy of his revered father in Black Panther<\/a><\/em>. But even when relationships are complex and prickly, we still see how much yearning our heroes have for approval and connection and love from their parents. And in Endgame<\/em>, some of those relationships make for some of the movie\u2019s most resonant moments.<\/p>\n 11. Forget saving the world: We\u2019ll do anything for our kids.<\/strong> The Ant-Man movies tend to be lighter entries in the MCU, but there\u2019s nothing light about Scott Lang\u2019s love for his daughter\u2014or for the lengths he\u2019ll go to save and care for her. He\u2019s not the only doting daddy we meet. One of the most beautiful respites in Avengers: Age of Ultron<\/em> was when Hawkeye took the team back to his farmhouse to meet the fam. In Black Panther<\/em>, we see how much mother Ramonda loves her little boy, T\u2019Challa. A mother\u2019s or father\u2019s love for her or his children propels the MCU over and over. Perhaps that\u2019s why when, in Infinity War<\/em> we see Thanos sacrifice his own daughter\u2014the thing he loves most in the world\u2014that it feels so shocking.<\/p>\n 12. Sometimes, you make your own family.<\/strong> Not everyone in the MCU is lucky enough to have a loving father or mother or their own children. And so\u2014because family is so important to someone\u2019s health and well-being\u2014they find and make their own. Natasha says as much in Endgame<\/em>: \u201cI used to have nothing. And then I got this,\u201d she says, referring to the Avengers. \u201cAnd even though they\u2019re gone, I\u2019m still trying to be better.\u201d The Guardians of the Galaxy<\/em> movies are both about family, really: None of the heroes have families (or, at least, good families), so they make their own. Groot knew it near the end of Guardians of the Galaxy<\/em>. Right before he sacrifices himself for his friends, he literally wraps them in his tendrils in a massive, wooden hug. \u201cWe are Groot<\/a>,\u201d he says. And while that might not sound that emotional for folks who haven\u2019t<\/em> seen the film, those of us who have might argue it\u2019s one of the most powerful, beautiful moments in any Marvel movie.<\/p>\n 13. Look closely.<\/strong> Fun fact: In Doctor Strange<\/a><\/em>, the doctor\u2019s near-eternal clash with Dormammu takes place on \u2026 Groundhog Day. And when a fan pointed it out on Twitter last year<\/a>, director Scott Derrickson immediately chimed in. \u201cI\u2019ve waited two years for somebody to notice this,\u201d he said. Any MCU fan knows that these movies are just saturated with Easter eggs\u2014little treasures that bring a we bit more joy to those in the know (or those with a lot of time to watch the film frame by frame). And while not all of us have that sort of time to look for obscure references for, say, Arrested Development references<\/a><\/em> in the MCU, it\u2019s good to remember that the joys in our own lives are often in the little moments, not the big ones. We should always be mindful of noticing and embracing those moments when they come.<\/p>\n 14. Good intentions don\u2019t mean diddly.<\/strong> The best villains in the MCU often think that they\u2019re the heroes of the story. Thanos is a good example: He thinks overpopulation is the real universal villain, and he feels he\u2019s the only guy with the stomach to take it on. We see that same \u201cthe ends justify the means\u201d philosophy in Age of Ultron<\/em> when Tony Stark (with an assist from Bruce Banner) creates Ultron. The AI isn\u2019t meant to be a supervillain, but a global protector. But Ultron\u2014without a soul or conscience to tell him otherwise\u2014jumps to the conclusion that to protect the globe, he\u2019ll have to eliminate humankind as we know it, beginning with the Avengers themselves. In our own lives, se sometimes believe that we have to do questionable things en route to our own happy endings. Deep down, we know better, and the MCU knows better, too.<\/p>\n 15. Every decision has consequences.<\/strong> Most MCU movies end, obviously, on a high note. Good guys win. The world is saved. We all cheer and go home. But when you look at the broader Marvel universe, it stresses that, sometimes, even our victories sow the seeds for the next conflict. Sure, the Avengers saved the planet from catastrophe in Age of Ultron, but the collateral damage led to the breech in Captain America: Civil War<\/em>. T\u2019Chaka, T\u2019Challa\u2019s father in Black Panther<\/em>, thought he was doing the right thing by killing his traitorous brother and leaving his nephew behind. But that act birthed a supervillain that almost brought down his kingdom. This is what history teaches us, too: There\u2019s no real \u201chappily ever after\u201d in this life. Only the next. And every choice we make\u2014even if it\u2019s absolutely the right choice\u2014comes with a price.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n 16. Our failures don\u2019t define us \u2026 unless we allow them to.<\/strong> This is a huge<\/em> theme in Endgame<\/em>, but let\u2019s steer clear of that for a moment and instead turn to (again) Age of Ultron<\/em> for illustration. As the world is literally falling apart, Scarlet Witch (Wanda Maximoff) is having a panic attack, brought about by the guilt she feels for precipitating the crisis. \u201cIt\u2019s all my fault,\u201d she says. Hawkeye isn\u2019t taking that. \u201cIt\u2019s your fault it\u2019s everyone\u2019s fault, who cares? Are you up for this? \u2026 It doesn\u2019t matter what you did or what you were. You go out there, you fight, and you fight to kill. Stay in here and you\u2019re good\u2014I\u2019ll send your brother to find you. But if you step out that door, you are an Avenger.\u201d When you look at the superheroes we meet in the MCU, few have lived blameless lives. Many have moments of guilt and regret. But they know the only way past whatever bad decisions they\u2019ve made is to look forward and make better decisions this time \u2018round. Guilt can paralyze us. Shame can send us spiraling out of control. But we can find redemption. It reminds me of that part of the Lord\u2019s Prayer: Forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors<\/em>. Which reminds me \u2026<\/p>\n 17. Be quick to forgive.<\/strong> You don\u2019t think about the Avengers as being forgiving sorts. And indeed, sometimes they\u2019re not. The rift between Tony Stark and Steve Rogers in Civil War and the movies that followed was, in many ways, precipitated by an inability to forgive. We see what a toll that friction took on both Tony and Steve and, by extension, the rest of the Avengers. But when characters choose to forgive one another\u2014even under some pretty difficult circumstances\u2014the story turns a little brighter. Gamora\u2019s ability to forgive Nebula (in spite of Nebula\u2019s frequent murder attempts) is perhaps the most obvious example, but the MCU is littered with stories of forgiveness. And unless Loki\u2019s in the mix, it\u2019s almost always the right choice.<\/p>\n 18. Don\u2019t be ruled by fear.<\/strong> Obviously, superheroes need to be brave in the face of danger and death. They literally face both every 15 minutes or so in the MCU. But facing our own challenges with courage is important in the real world, too. Take a look at Chris Evans, the guy who plays Captain America. He says that Marvel asked him several times to play the First Avenger. Each time, he refused. \u201cI said no the first few times because I think that I was just scared of it, and the more that I spoke to my friends and family about it, the more that they were saying \u2018Chris, you can\u2019t make a decision based on fear. You\u2019ll regret that more than anything else\u2019,\u201d Evans told The New York Times. <\/a><\/em>After the Endgame<\/em> premiere, he indicated that he\u2019s been thrilled to be a part of the franchise<\/a>. \u201cIt\u2019s been such a huge chunk of my life, which means more to me than I can put into words,\u201d he said. \u201cI have a lot of my family and friends here tonight, but I have a lot of my family and friends up here now, too.\u201d It\u2019s clich\u00e9 to say that you need to face risk to reap reward: No guts, no glory. And yet, it\u2019s so true. Making decisions based out of fear is a pathway to stagnation, if not out-and-out loss. Even when you\u2019re not facing down Thanos.<\/p>\n 19. Loss is a part of life.<\/strong> Throughout the MCU, we\u2019ve seen our characters suffer loss and pain. T\u2019Challa lost his father. Wanda lost her brother. Thor lost his parents. In Infinity War<\/em>, the losses we see are incalculable. And now, with Endgame<\/em> serving as a finale (of sorts) to a remarkable 22-movie saga, we fans are losing something, too: The MCU reminds us that, in this life, all things have an expiration date. The only thing we can count on is change itself. This is a particularly hard lesson for me to internalize. When I love something, I hate it to end, even if the ending\u2019s happy. And yet, as Tony Stark says in the Endgame trailer, \u201cPart of the journey is the end.\u201d<\/p>\n 20. \u2018It\u2019s not all about you.\u2019<\/strong> This line, from Doctor Strange<\/em>, competes with \u201cWe are Groot\u201d for my favorite line in the whole MCU. It\u2019s as true in Marvel\u2019s universe as it is in our own. When we watch these superheroes do their thing on screen, we forget that they are, in many ways, servants. They serve the world, serve each other and, I think, serve a higher calling\u2014a greater sense of righteousness and good that surpasses human understanding.<\/p>\n 21. You\u2019re part of a bigger picture.<\/strong> On The Tonight Show with Jimmy Kimmel<\/em>, Captain Marvel\u2019<\/em>s Brie Larson recently talked about filming the post-credits scene where she shows up at Avengers headquarters.<\/p>\n<\/a><\/a><\/a>