{"id":49,"date":"2012-12-27T21:01:36","date_gmt":"2012-12-28T04:01:36","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/welcometable\/?p=49"},"modified":"2012-12-29T13:50:47","modified_gmt":"2012-12-29T20:50:47","slug":"mike-crapo-the-first-boy-i-kissed","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/welcometable\/2012\/12\/mike-crapo-the-first-boy-i-kissed\/","title":{"rendered":"Mike Crapo: The First Boy I Kissed"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

Mike doesn\u2019t remember it, I\u2019m sure.\u00a0 He was twelve years old.\u00a0 I was eight.\u00a0 I was hopelessly infatuated with him\u2013as any eight year old girl would have been.\u00a0 He was adorable. Picture this: dark hair styled like Paul McCartney\u2019s; grey-green eyes; tall and still verging the\u00a0growth spurt that would make him a lean specimen of manhood any\u00a0artist could use\u00a0as a model for Peter the Apostle.<\/p>\n

He was my uncle George\u2019s best friend.\u00a0 I was certainly perceived as a bratty kid\u2013and a redhead at that, with invisible eyelashes, barely-there eyebrows and an ever present \u201cI give up\u201d pony tail binding my unruly hair.<\/p>\n

Usually, Mike responded to my attempts at conversation with something like, \u201cGo away, Kid.\u201d<\/p>\n

But there came a time when I was standing on a couch and Mike was two feet away from me. I am no mathmetician, but I started calculating distance, velocity, risk.\u00a0 Yes, I could do it.\u00a0 I could reach out, grab his shoulders, and plant a solid kiss on his lips.\u00a0 I waited until he was perfectly positioned, and then I leapt.\u00a0 Yes! I was exactly where I needed to be, and my lips were smack dab on his!\u00a0 The chance would never present itself again.\u00a0 I\u00a0kissed Mike Crapo.<\/p>\n

His response was predictable.\u00a0 \u201cMarkie! Eeew!\u201d\u00a0 He wiped his lips\u2013twice.\u00a0 Didn\u2019t matter.\u00a0 My kiss had transcended his skin and gone into his blood. That\u2019s how passionate it was.\u00a0 My uncles and aunts had all witnessed it, and sputtered out incredulous reactions like, \u201cMarkie! What were you thinking?\u201d \u201cWhy did you do that?\u201d \u201cI can\u2019t believe you did that!\u201d \u201cWhat kind of a girl are you?\u201d<\/p>\n

Their condemnations were nothing.\u00a0 I had kissed Mike Crapo.<\/p>\n

That was the last time I remember being within a few feet of him.\u00a0 I suspect he avoided me from then on.\u00a0 But I suspect he remembers me.\u00a0 If you asked how old he was when he got his first kiss, he would probably give a different age than twelve, but I know better.<\/p>\n

Mike got married while I was still in high school.\u00a0 I moved on to other infatuations and finally to a deep and steadfast love.\u00a0 Still, Mike\u2019s name brings memories of innocence and youth.<\/p>\n

So it was a personal shock to see that name and his sixty-one-year-old face, the hair no longer black but still thick, on the television screen above the news banner: \u201cIdaho Senator Mike Crapo Arrested for DUI.\u201d<\/p>\n

I was at the gym, working on the elliptical and listening to \u201cRock You Like a Hurricane!\u201d I wonder if anyone heard me gasp, \u201cOh no!\u00a0 Oh Mike!\u201d<\/p>\n

Nobody needed to tell me what LDS Church<\/a> positions he had held.\u00a0 I\u00a0knew.\u00a0 I remember my grandmother talking about seeing Mike in the Idaho Falls LDS Temple.\u00a0 He approached her and said, \u201cHello, Sister Groberg.\u201d They had a delightful chat, as she described it.<\/p>\n

My first thought, after I had processed the news of Mike\u2019s DUI, was that he must have been carrying a terrible burden for years.\u00a0 I don\u2019t know if he\u2019s an alcoholic, but I do know addiction, and I think he might be.<\/p>\n

I attend LDS \u201cAddiction Recovery Services\u201d with my son weekly.\u00a0 He is fighting a drug addiction and I am learning how to love deeper\u00a0and how to let go. Too many of us\u00a0parents see quick fixes for our children and try to impose our agendas on them.\u00a0 I am simply\u00a0with my son on the path, and we are enjoying one another\u2019s company. I have a new appreciation for him as a recovering addict, and a new vision of his depth and determination.<\/p>\n

I have a friend who also attends a 12-step program.\u00a0 He is addicted to sex and pornography.\u00a0 I knew him once as my student and enjoyed his work and his personality.\u00a0 I wrote to him occasionally while he was a missionary.\u00a0 After he returned,\u00a0I introduced him to one of my Sunday school students, a sweet nineteen-year-old girl.<\/p>\n

I won\u2019t describe more than that.\u00a0 He confessed what he had done.\u00a0 I took the news in, let it sit, cried, but found that I couldn\u2019t hate this young man. I couldn\u2019t kill my maternal concern for him, even though he had hurt someone dear to me.\u00a0 I knew he was ill.\u00a0 I wanted him to get better.\u00a0 I wanted her\u00a0to be healed\u2013to see her\u00a0own magnificence.<\/p>\n

I love how my friend Kent White describes the power of the atonement:<\/p>\n

\u00a0I assert that there is no \u201cstain of sin\u201d in the traditional sense (a debt to some impersonal \u201cJustice\u201d leaving its mark of \u201cunworthy\u201d on our soul), rather only relationships that are at various levels of trust and love, for which I feel a sense of obligation. In this sense I agree with William James that there are no insignificant or private sins, in that my sins are what keep me from becoming fully engaged in the humanity\/divinity of others. Habits to me represent the very deepest sense of how we see others and respond to their needs. The fruit of sin is not registered on some tally, but rather in my very habits, my entire way of being with others. I do not need to repent of my sins, rather I need to repent of sinning; I need a new set of habits which will lead me to a trustworthy character.<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Whether or not Mike Crapo needs to attend a 12-step program is his business, not mine.\u00a0 My son says, \u201cMost people go to church so they won\u2019t go to Hell.\u00a0 Addicts go because they\u2019re already in Hell.\u201d<\/p>\n

Mike Crapo as a model for Peter the Apostle?\u00a0 Yes, he could still be that.\u00a0 He could still be the man who denied his \u201cbetter angels\u201d and then learned a new level of loyalty, deeper and more demanding\u00a0than he had ever supposed.<\/p>\n

Mike\u00a0 has already apologized to his family, his constituency, his state.\u00a0 I am not on his side politically\u2013I\u2019m a liberal.\u00a0 But I am on his side, and on anyone else\u2019s side, in\u00a0the light of Christ\u2013regardless of what denomination each of us claims.\u00a0 I believe in hope that transcends shame.\u00a0 I know each of us can become a new creature in Christ, and that each of us can fall. Each of us will <\/em>fall. We must then\u00a0ask ourselves if we\u2019ll label our fall as the end or merely a bump on a much longer and more arduous journey than we had realized.<\/p>\n

The questions\u2013\u201cWhy did you do that?\u201d \u201cWhat were you thinking?\u201d \u201cWhat kind of a person are you?\u201d\u2013begin to fade as we remember the stronger messages radiating from the Heavens. \u201cFear not.\u00a0 Lift up your eyes. I bring you good tidings of great joy. You are mine, you are mine, you are mine.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Mike doesn\u2019t remember it, I\u2019m sure.\u00a0 He was twelve years old.\u00a0 I was eight.\u00a0 I was hopelessly infatuated with him\u2013as any eight year old girl would have been.\u00a0 He was adorable. Picture this: dark hair styled like Paul McCartney\u2019s; grey-green eyes; tall and still verging the\u00a0growth spurt that would make him a lean specimen of […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1301,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[4,6,5,7],"class_list":["post-49","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-mike-crapo","tag-mormons","tag-politics","tag-scandals"],"yoast_head":"\nMike Crapo: The First Boy I Kissed<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Mike doesn't remember it, I'm sure.\u00a0 He was twelve years old.\u00a0 I was eight.\u00a0 I was hopelessly infatuated with him--as any eight year old girl would have\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/welcometable\/2012\/12\/mike-crapo-the-first-boy-i-kissed\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Mike Crapo: The First Boy I Kissed\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Mike doesn't remember it, I'm sure.\u00a0 He was twelve years old.\u00a0 I was eight.\u00a0 I was hopelessly infatuated with him--as any eight year old girl would have\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/welcometable\/2012\/12\/mike-crapo-the-first-boy-i-kissed\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"The Welcome Table\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2012-12-28T04:01:36+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2012-12-29T20:50:47+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Margaret Blair Young\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Margaret Blair Young\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"6 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/welcometable\/2012\/12\/mike-crapo-the-first-boy-i-kissed\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/welcometable\/2012\/12\/mike-crapo-the-first-boy-i-kissed\/\",\"name\":\"Mike Crapo: The First Boy I Kissed\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/welcometable\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2012-12-28T04:01:36+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2012-12-29T20:50:47+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/welcometable\/#\/schema\/person\/d37d1777600358796768346d57ed0d47\"},\"description\":\"Mike doesn't remember it, I'm sure.\u00a0 He was twelve years old.\u00a0 I was eight.\u00a0 I was hopelessly infatuated with him--as any eight year old girl would have\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/welcometable\/2012\/12\/mike-crapo-the-first-boy-i-kissed\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/welcometable\/2012\/12\/mike-crapo-the-first-boy-i-kissed\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/welcometable\/2012\/12\/mike-crapo-the-first-boy-i-kissed\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/welcometable\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Mike Crapo: The First Boy I Kissed\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/welcometable\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/welcometable\/\",\"name\":\"The Welcome Table\",\"description\":\"Love Bade Me Welcome\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/welcometable\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":\"required name=search_term_string\"}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/welcometable\/#\/schema\/person\/d37d1777600358796768346d57ed0d47\",\"name\":\"Margaret Blair Young\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/welcometable\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/6a77e29fd335afdccad6abc2851d372e?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/6a77e29fd335afdccad6abc2851d372e?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"Margaret Blair Young\"},\"description\":\"Margaret Blair Young taught literature and creative writing at Brigham Young University from 1984-2018. 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