3 Reasons Why MLM Parties Are the Absolute Worst

3 Reasons Why MLM Parties Are the Absolute Worst August 11, 2018
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Every couple of weeks, I get a ding to my phone from Facebook. A notification alerts me that someone is inviting me to an event. My eyes light up, and I get excited to find out about the party. I click the notification to find out the details. A frown forms on my face, and I feel like I want to punch the host or hostess. Unfortunately, I didn’t get invited to a swanky dinner party or birthday party. Nope, some random person on Facebook wants me to come to their “party” to buy some crap a friend of theirs is selling. Ugh, another invitation to a party for a Multi-Level-Marketing product. I don’t understand why I always get invited to these parties by people I barely know. There are three reasons MLM parties are the absolute worst.

The Events are the WORST

First, I don’t want to sit and listen to someone hawk a product for an hour. Even if the hostess gives me a bunch of booze, no amount of alcohol is going to make the sales-pitch bearable. Every single event is the same. A bunch of women who don’t know each other sit uncomfortably as they watch the consultant present the product. The presentations are drawn out and boring. Every product is the BEST EVER, life-changing, available for a limited time, and none are available in stores.

Ok, nope. None of that is even remotely true. Most of the products the consultants sell you can get at Walmart or Target for half the price. Despite all of that knowledge, I still end up buying the crap. I blame the alcohol the hostess serves me for clouding my judgment. Then there is the whole “I need to help my friend win hostess prizes” sold by the consultant that further compels me to buy.

As if the buying the crap isn’t bad enough, the consult will harass me to join her team. The consultant will go on and on about how much money they make. They want me to have the same opportunity as them. If getting me to join doesn’t work, then I get hounded to host a party at my house. All of the prodding and incessant begging gives me a headache, and I want to scream.

Inevitably, I leave the part $100 bucks poorer and have a horrible headache from the cheap booze I sucked down during the presentation. Generally, I’m pissed off at my friend who invited me for wasting my time. By the time the crap arrives at my house, I toss it in the trash or stick it in a closet never to look at it again.

I Barely know the Hostess

My second reason for declining the invites is because I barely know the hostess. The invites are always from randos in my life. The kind of people that invite me are the following:

A Random Chick from High School that I haven’t talked to in decades.

Neighbors I might have met at a park or said hi to one time.

A co-worker that I don’t even acknowledge in the copy room or at meetings.

My friend’s cousin’s husband’s wife that suddenly needs to meet me.

I mean seriously? Why on earth do I want to go to a party with people I don’t even know. Imagine how awkward it would be if I showed up at the party. What the heck do you talk about with these people you barely know?

If you don’t talk to me in real life, inviting me to an MLM party is weird. If we haven’t ever sat down for a cup of coffee together, we probably aren’t friends. When I get the invite to the party, the evidence is clear that I’m a dollar sign more than a human.  No thank you.

I hate Multi-Level Marketing Companies

My final reason for not going to these stupid parties is due to my convictions about MLM companies. MLM companies are predatory scams that prey on vulnerable people. Each company markets their products as an opportunity to make fast money. Women, in particular, are exploited for their desire to want to work from home. These companies know what pitch to say to get people to join.

Get rich scams are packaged in various ways to manipulate buyers and sellers. MLM companies tie the fraud in bows around over-priced supplements, oils, clothes, make-up, or cooking utensils to allure women to join. Supplements are touted as life-changing. Essential oils can cure any possible ailment. All of the sales pitches are big fat lies.

None of the products are superior to anything sold in stores. The scam only benefits the people at the top of the pyramid. Almost all of these companies pay commissions out for consultants recruiting their friends to sell the products.

No one makes money in these scams except the people at the top. My friend who is hosting the party isn’t going make a living shilling this crap. She’s probably going to quit selling the product within a year. If she makes any income, she will spend twice that by ordering products to be eligible for commission.

I’m not in good faith going to support anyone involved in these scams. Sorry, not sorry.

Hosting a party should be about getting together and having fun with friends. Under no circumstance should a party be about buying products or guilting people into joining Pyramid scams. What fun is in manipulating your friends?

That’s not a party, that’s just mean.

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What Are Your Thoughts?leave a comment
  • Jim Jones

    Nowadays you can find better, cheaper stuff on your phone while at the ‘party’.

    That should out a damper on it.

    I’ve been to timeshare presentations for the free prizes. Never bought anything because the sales ‘techniques’ are laughably bad.

  • OMG you are so right about the timeshare presentations! They are awful.

  • Raging Bee

    I don’t understand why I always get invited to these parties by people I barely know.

    Is it possible that your previous association with MLMs got you onto a list or database that is now being sold to other aspiring MLM converts? Hey, maybe someone could create an MLM network whose product is personal information! Now THAT would be an interesting sales pitch/party to get invited to…

  • Cozmo the Magician

    I think I read about something like that.. Umm.. bookspace? umm.. spaceface? Ohh.. now I remember.. Facebook!

  • LOL! YES!

  • Snaga

    The weirdest one for me is the sex toy parties. I don’t think I’m a prude but I wouldn’t want to be surrounded by strangers talking about sex toys.

    I have a friend that does Younique. That is some cult-like stuff that I’ve not seen on the same level before.

  • Oh girl, there are cults in ALL of them. Lularoe is pretty cult

  • Mr. James Parson

    You have to listen to the whole presentation before getting a toaster.

  • Mimc

    No reason to go to these parties now that you can just get Tupperware products on Amazon

  • Except it’s way more than tupperware now

  • Mimc

    True but Tupperware was the only brand worth the effort and now it’s unnecessary.

  • Combinatorial_Implosion

    >>I don’t understand why I always get invited to these parties by people I barely know.

    In addition to your prior association with MLM, already discussed by Raging Bee, I think this has a lot to do with it:

    >>Despite all of that knowledge, I still end up buying the crap.

    Think about it, what better prospect is there for a party whose purpose is to sell stuff than someone who has bought stuff at a prior party? As long as you continue shelling out money, whether “to help the hostess” or due to the alcohol you consumed, they are going to keep inviting you to their marketing party. I do have a suggestion for something that could get you on a black list. If you do decide to go to such a party in the future, prepare a “counter-presentation” go through the stuff you have detailed on this blog, about why this stuff is a pyramid scam (MLM firms, as you probably know, hate the “p” word), why the hostess should stop selling this stuff and no one else should sign up. It shouldn’t take very much of this before, voila, you stop getting invited.