Recently we shared the story of an active duty spouse that refused medical care for her pregnancy. The mother decided on birth her child at home without medical assistance. Her husband, an active duty medic, planned to assist with the delivery. After her labor stalled, she delivered a stillborn on October 28th. Today the mother took to her Facebook group to share the news. She also provided insight into the status of her husband’s job.
The mother started sharing her story with the Facebook group in mid-October. We previously reported she needed information on disposing of her placenta. She also shared that a friend from her bible study threatened to report her husband to the base commander.
Even though her husband could lose his job for helping, she proceeded with her plans to deliver at home without assistance. She allowed her pregnancy to enter the 42nd week. When pregnancies go past 40 weeks, the placenta begins to die. A dying placenta reduces oxygen to the infant and makes contractions intolerable for the baby.
She told the group she had prodromal labor for six total days. The mother’s water broke at 42 weeks two days. 48 hours after her water broke, the baby had not engaged in the process. Group members suggested spinning the baby, castor oil, and baths to help the labor move along.
At one point she appeared to question if she should seek medical assistance, but group members encouraged her to stay at home. When the group went silent for days, members grew concerned. On the 31st, a group member updated everyone that the mother told her terrible news.
Doubt filled the group about whether the mother would return to share her story. Then early this morning she updated with a brief post to the group. She said her son was “born sleeping,” on October 28th. She said she didn’t have time to share details because they were busy planning the funeral.
We are offended by the notion that her child was born sleeping. The mother killed her child by not seeking proper medical care. None the less, the post garnered a lot of attention and support from the group.
Quickly, an outpouring of condolences filled the post from members of the group. However, we noticed a disturbing trend. Three other mothers within this tiny Facebook group of fewer than 400 women shared they also lost newborns. Two of the infant deaths occurred in the past six months.
We confirmed that one of the mother’s that shared their loss had previously posted about the death to the group. In a post from June, the mother told the group her child was born asleep. The infant was also over 41 weeks gestation.
The women fail to connect the dots that in a group of 350 women there have been three infant deaths this year. This mortality rate of infants is massively higher than what we have seen in any other birth groups we have investigated.
Without any time to grieve, another mother opened a thread to talk about how to handle investigations if their child dies as a result of unassisted birth. Members responded to that they knew of only one case in 20 years where parents had been reported.
After a few responses, a mother brought up that CPS can open cases when an infant dies. The mother of the dead infant from October 28th responded that her family is dealing an investigation. She gave few details, but she promised to share later.
At this point, the details remain unclear about what happened in the delivery. However, we now have confirmation from the mother the infant is dead. She also confirmed her family is currently under investigation.
After we posted our article yesterday, numerous service members reached out to us to confirm that her husband could receive a dishonorable discharge for his part.
While we certainly have empathy for any parent that loses a child, this child did not have to die. The mother had free health care offered to her by the U.S. Military. She knew her husband could be reprimanded if he participated in the birth. Despite the threats she received, she put her experience and the birth in front of the needs of her family.
This mother has two other children that may be forever impacted by her reckless and selfish choice.
As more details come forward, we will post the updates.
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