Woman Demands Refund of Custom Order After Learning Seller has Autism

Woman Demands Refund of Custom Order After Learning Seller has Autism July 16, 2019
angry woman on the phone – stock image.

A woman canceled an order she placed for coffee mugs after she found out the seller had autism. The customer demanded a full refund after she spent time reading his personal Facebook account.

According to a post shared on Reddit, the woman placed an order for four glitter-base coffee mugs that said, “addicted to pot.” After placing the order, the woman went onto Facebook to find out more about the seller.

On Facebook, she learned the seller had autism. Based upon her findings, she reached out to the seller and demanded a refund. Not only did the woman requested a refund, but she also called the seller a “retard.”

The woman started the exchange by writing, “I need to cancel the order I placed yesterday morning. I no longer wish to purchase the mugs.”

Seeing the message, the seller responded, “Hi! Since this was a custom order and I’ve already started working on it, I’m not able to cancel it for you. I’ve already applied the glitter to the mugs and wouldn’t be able to use them for another order.”

Not happy with the response from the seller, the woman responded, “No, that’s unacceptable. I no longer want to purchase from someone like you and have decided to go with a crafter who’s more capable of doing them correctly. I expect you to refund me immediately or I’ll be opening a case with PayPal.

Shocked by the woman’s response, the seller attempted to quell her fears about their capability. According to the seller, they have made more than 300 sales and have a 5-star review.

The seller wrote, “I’m very much capable of making your items. If you check the main page of my shop, you’ll find that I’ve had more than 300 sales and a 5-star rating. I’ve never sent out anything if I thought it wouldn’t be exactly what the customer wanted. I’m not sure why you would think I wouldn’t be able to make these items.”

Then the customer responded by disclosing she had crept the seller’s business Facebook page. Through the page, she located the seller’s personal profile. From the seller’s profile, the customer learned he had autism.

She wrote, “I found your business page on Facebook and saw your profile. There were several posts on it about “autism awareness.” I thought at first that it was in support of someone you know who is autistic, but I eventually came to realize that you’re the one with autism. My neighbor’s son has that, and after observing his behaviors, I do not believe anyone with the disease would be able to make these mugs properly.”

After the seller received the message, they attempted to explain more about autism. Autism Spectrum Disorder varies from person to person. Characteristics of autism include rigid thinking, repetitive behavior, difficulty with socializing, sensory processing issues, and communication issues. The disorder can profoundly impair or minimally impact people.

The seller wrote, “Autism is a spectrum disorder. Each person with autism is different and has a different level of functioning. I’m very high functioning and am more than capable of making the items in my shops.”

Sadly, the customer did not believe the seller. She responded by saying, “You’re all the same level of retard. Cancel the damn order.”

Despite the woman’s demands, customers typically cannot request refunds for custom orders. Certain circumstances may make it reasonable to request a return such as the product arrives broken or not as described. However, requesting a refund due to the stereotypical belief that people with autism are “retarded” is not a valid reason.

Most individuals with ASD do not have cognitive disabilities. According to the Centers for Disease Control, 31% of children diagnosed with autism have intellectual disabilities. Additionally, most individuals with autism can speak or communicate.

Because the seller is considered “high functioning,” their autism would not impact their ability to create or work. In the case of the seller, they had 300 satisfied customers and a 5-star rating. Sadly, the discrimination the seller faced is not uncommon to people on the autism spectrum. Individuals with autism are often called the r-word as an insult. Using the r-world to describe someone’s cognitive ability is never justified.

The seller did not say if they decided to refund the customer. Hopefully, they were able to walk away without the customer filing a bogus complaint with PayPal.

*Katie Joy is a columnist and hosts Without A Crystal Ball on Patheos Non-Religious Channel. She writes articles on parenting, disability advocacy, debunking pseudoscience, atheism, and crimes against women and children.

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What Are Your Thoughts?leave a comment
  • Lambchopsuey

    FOUR mugs. This can’t be a very large amount of money. And this woman is willing to go to all this fuss just for that? She’s got a serious problem.

  • johnsoncatman

    The vendor showed much more class than the customer. He could have given her name and address so that people would know her and how much of an as sh ole she is.

  • Friend

    The custom glitter mugs were supposed to be inscribed thus: “Add1cted to p0t.” I gather that the “O” is shaped like a coffee p0t.

    (Another self-censored version of a comment in the filter. Nope, you can’t quote the original post.)

  • Raging Bee

    I agree. She could have waited till the mugs arrived, then inspected them for defects — which would be standard procedure regardless of the seller’s physical or mental condition. This customer is a 69hysterical 69idiot looking for opportunities to bash other people, for reasons entirely her own.

  • The vendor should offer her a deal: Cancel the order in exchange for allowing their entire email exchange to be posted in the clear on her FB timeline.

  • WallofSleep

    Could be, and would make the most sense if they were coffee mugs. My first thought was a play on the word “pottery”. Not far from where I live is a business called “The P0t Farm”, which specializes in making and selling all manner of functional and decorative earthen ware.

  • RainbowPhoenix

    Anti-vaxxers like Jenny McCarthy carry a lot of responsibility for these attitudes. They’ve spent years spreading the idea that autism is the worst thing ever, without actually seeking any sort of input from autistic adults.

  • B.A.

    What a bit ch. The seller,that is.

  • valleycat1

    If knowing such a detail about the seller could make you not want to order, next time snoop around before deciding to order. This seems to me a case of regretting making an order and then fishing around for a reason to be able to cancel.

  • Michael Neville

    I’m on the autism spectrum. I have a graduate degree, I spent 20 years in the Navy, serving in submarines and retiring as a Senior Chief Petty Officer (E8). I was an accounting manager for a large company for over ten years before I retired from there. I was married for over 45 years to the same woman before she died. In short, other than being autistic, I’ve lived a reasonably successful life.

  • Jim Jones

    She MUST be a Christian.

  • Jim Jones


  • Delta

    Yep. This wasn’t about the mugs. It was about her disgust at an autistic person living their life.

  • Delta

    Yep. If an autistic person dares to speak up for themself, it’s because they’re too “high-functioning,” and don’t really count, and don’t know just how HARD it is to live with a “low-functioning” person. Not how hard it is to be the “low-functioning” autistic person, how hard it is to merely know them.

    “High-functioning” is used to deny support. “Low-functioning” is used to deny agency.

  • nmgirl

    I’m confused. Why are you dissing the seller?

  • Delta

    Hatred of disabled people is not a uniquely Christian concept, but… yeah. This kind of attitude reminds me of people who throw a fit when the cashier doesn’t say “Merry Christmas” on Dec. 1.

  • Scenario

    The best way to get really good at making pottery is to do it over and over again. From my understanding, people who have autism tend to be able to concentrate on things that they like to do quite well. I really can’t see any reason at all that a person with autism couldn’t make excellent pottery.

  • guerillasurgeon

    Well at least we know who the “69retard” is now right? 🙂

  • Knitting Cat Lady

    According to the buyer’s logic I don’t exist…

    I’m a nuclear engineer. And obviously all autists are too stupid to for university.

    Since I can’t be both autistic and an engineer it’s obvious that I’m someone’s imaginary friend.

  • TheBookOfDavid

    If recent comment history is any guide, they likely meant to say “customer”.

  • TheBookOfDavid

    Ahh…but can you make a custom set of coffee mugs? In glitter glaze? Gotcha!

  • Michael Neville

    Hangs head in shame.

  • Stephen F. Babis

    I have a coffee mug collection and now want to add to it just to support the young artist…and to thumb my nose at the foolish woman with no clue as to the usefulness of art therapy in many aspects of life. Not sure if you mentioned this earlier but any way to get the artist’s information?

  • phatkhat

    I’m guessing a search on Etsy for custom mugs. Look for someone with around 500 sales and 5-star feedback. I’m going to search, too. Maybe he makes cat mugs!

    ETA: Well, who woulda thunk there were THAT many mug sellers with glitter mugs on Etsy. 🙁

  • B.A.

    I just edited it;meant to say the customer. Sorry.

  • Darren Lee
  • Darren Lee

    Read the post on Katies page, this story was exposed as fake

  • sapphiremind

    This post should be edited, since it has been shown that the seller was faking the incident for attention/sales.

  • Sophotroph

    I can’t help but wonder why, if this is true, you failed to include a link to a reputable source which says so.

  • sapphiremind

    It was passed around a couple days after, including in groups I know the author is in, so I didn’t link it. *shrugs*


  • sapphiremind

    https://imgur.com/l1pKBCP pulled from the thread