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<\/a>When I was in ninth grade, we read John Gunther\u2019s \u201cDeath Be Not Proud,\u201d the true story of the death of Gunther\u2019s teenage son by brain tumor. So I smile at the title of episode 7, \u201cDeath Be Not Whatever.\u201d<\/p>\nAt career day at the high school, Joan stops at a booth for the airline industry and talks with Stewardess God. For once, the Almighty\u2019s instructions are a bit vague. Instead of \u201cGet a job in the bookstore,\u201d or \u201cHave a yard sale,\u201d God advises Joan: \u201cYou\u2019re going to be in the position to help someone. You\u2019re going to have to pay attention. Look at behavior. Not everyone knows how to look for help.\u201d<\/p>\n
Not every TV show cites K\u00fcbler-Ross or quotes Kierkegaard, which is another reason to like JoA. While Joan is pondering God\u2019s advice, her mother, Helen, is agonizing over Kevin\u2019s paralysis, caused by a car accident. She consults a priest, who advises her to read Elizabeth K\u00fcbler-Ross\u2019s classic work on the five stages of grief. Helen: \u201cBut no one died.\u201d Priest: \u201cKevin didn\u2019t pass on, but all of you experienced a kind of death.\u201d The scene in a luncheonette closes with Kierkegaard, courtesy of the priest: \u201cThe most painful state of being is remembering the future, particularly one you can never have.\u201d<\/p>\n
Joan\u2019s pal Adam is moping, complaining that he \u201chates November.\u201d Joan and Grace think he\u2019s just being his spacey self. But when Joan takes a babysitting job, looking after Rocky, a death-obsessed little boy who is dying himself, she ultimately learns why Adam is blue. Rocky\u2019s mom explains to Joan that Rocky has an aggressive form of cystic fibrosis and is unlikely to survive his next infection. In the next scene, Rocky takes Joan to the cemetery, his favorite hangout.<\/p>\n
Joan: When you said a fun place, I was thinking, like, Laser Tag.
Rocky: I find it informational.
Joan: Rocky, I understand now, what\u2019s happening to you. . . . Would it make you feel better to know that there\u2019s someone out there watching for us and caring for us and that this person or thing will still be watching for us and caring about us after we leave?
Rocky: I don\u2019t believe in God.
Joan: What if I promised, I mean, cross-my-heart promised? I\u2019ve seen Him.
Rocky: You\u2019ve had a near-death experience?
Joan: No, I \u2014 I\u2019ve seen him, sometimes, it\u2019s not always a him, it\u2019s complicated \u2014 but the point is, God is there, and if he\u2019s there, there\u2019s a plan, and if there\u2019s a plan, then everything is going to be OK. I think.
Rocky: Yeah, that\u2019d be cool.<\/p>\n
Still in the cemetery, Rocky comments that many people seem to die on or about their own birthday. \u201cThere,\u201d he says, pointing, \u201canother example.\u201d Joan looks to see the headstone of Adam\u2019s mother, who was born and died in, yes, November.<\/p>\n
After lovely scenes between Joan and Adam, and Helen and Will (she shares the K\u00fcbler-Ross book with him), the episode closes with a scene on the bus between Joan and Hottie God (the same young, good-looking male God who appeared in the pilot). Joan is feeling blue about Rocky\u2019s condition and Adam\u2019s grief.<\/p>\n
Joan (to God): You have a lot to answer for, buddy. Nobody asked to be born. So we all get to die, and everybody we love dies?
God: Yeah.
Joan: And that\u2019s good for you?
God: Joan, there\u2019s nothing I could say about that that would make sense to you.
Joan: A lot of what happens here really sucks, so so much for your perfect system! Do you see me being really mad at you right now?
God: Yes.
Joan: Why does it have to be so hard?
God: What specifically?
Joan: Being alive. Let\u2019s start there.
God: Do you wish you weren\u2019t alive?
Joan: No. I don\u2019t know. I wish it didn\u2019t hurt so much.
God: It hurts because you feel it, Joan, because you\u2019re alive. I love people. That generates a lot of power, a lot of energy, the same energy that binds atoms together. We\u2019ve all seen what happens when you try to pry them apart.
Joan: So if I don\u2019t get attached to people it won\u2019t hurt so much?
God: No, it\u2019s in your nature to get attached to people. I put that in the recipe. It\u2019s when you guys try to ignore that, when you try to go it alone, that it gets ugly. It\u2019s hell.
Joan: It\u2019s hell . . . ? Like the <\/i>hell?
Bus stops.
God: Oh, look: your house. Go on, Joan, people are waiting for you.<\/p>\n
As the bus pulls away bearing Hottie God, up comes Ben Harper\u2019s song on the soundtrack, \u201cI am blessed to be a witness<\/a>.\u201d Which is getting to be exactly how it feels to write this blog.<\/p>\n
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