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This is Joe Six-Pack here. I haven\u2019t received much hate mail in a while so I must be doing something wrong. Therefore, I will explain sex to everyone who stumbles in here today. What with all the hoopla going on with the HHS mandate, you might think that that development is all about birth-control and such. \u00a0But it isn\u2019t.<\/a><\/p>\n After all, for some strange reason, the modern world believes the wacky idea that sex is a \u201cblack box\u201d that simply cannot be understood.<\/p>\n What do I mean by a \u201cblack box?\u201d I mean \u201cit is so complex that it can\u2019t be fathomed, much less controlled, by a mere human person.\u201d Here is what my trusty Merriam-Webster Dictionary<\/a> says,<\/p>\n black box, noun<\/strong> \u00a0<\/p>\n 1: a usually complicated electronic device whose internal mechanism is usually hidden from or mysterious to the user; broadly : anything that has mysterious or unknown internal functions or mechanisms<\/em><\/p>\n I reckon they mean like your cell-phone, for instance. I\u2019m going to take a wild stab in the dark and assert that the only thing you know about how your cell-phone works is that when you push the \u201cpower on\u201d button to the \u201con\u201d position, it works. And when you don\u2019t, it doesn\u2019t.<\/p>\n As far as you\u2019re concerned, all the electrons whizzing around inside the \u201cblack-box\u201d of your cell phone, are a mystery. Hell, it might as well be magic, for crying out loud. Let\u2019s move on to another \u201cblack box\u201d that I\u2019m more familiar with<\/a> and many of you are not: the engine in your car. Here\u2019s what most of us know about the engine in our car: we have one.<\/p>\n Sometimes, scary lights pop up on our dash boards with ominous warnings like \u201ccheck engine!,\u201d in which we say \u201cdamn!, what\u2019s wrong with this thing, it seems to be running fine.\u201d\u00a0But since you don\u2019t know the first thing about engines, because you\u2019re not interested in them, or you don\u2019t have time to learn about them, or you never learned about them in school (auto shop got tossed to the wayside long ago, and anyway, only dummies took that class), or whatever the reason, you panic and park the car. Or you immediately take it to the shop, shell out $300 and they make that scary light turn off. Or you just keep driving and say \u201cthe hell with it;\u201d at least until the next smog inspection comes due.<\/p>\n This brings me to sexual education and the modern world. Despite knowing more about how babies are made than we as a species have ever known before, collectively the modern world has thrown in the towel on the idea that each of us can know how our bodies, sex, and the resultant baby making, works. If I were a visitor from another planet, that would be my conclusion.<\/p>\n Because with the help of modern science, it is pretty easy to understand that a) the male of the species is a \u201clive wire,\u201d who is \u201calways on\u201d and whose \u201cseeds\u201d may be planted at any time. So much for demystifying the male \u201cblack box.\u201d In electricity, this is represented by a \u201cplus sign,\u201d a symbol meaning \u201ca positive current.\u201d It is the 21st Century, and I\u2019m sure I haven\u2019t lost any of you yet, right?<\/p>\n Next, we have to discuss the miraculous \u201cblack box\u201d known as the female of our species. I\u2019ll be calling the female, \u201cher\u201d and \u201cshe\u201d throughout this short explanation. You have my permission to call me \u201csexist.\u201d<\/p>\n Unlike the male, she is on a cycle, see? And thanks to modern science, we know this cycle is b) predictable. I don\u2019t want to get all technical on you but, it being the 21st Century and all, the fact that this cycle is regular and predictable pretty much demystifies the female \u201cblack box.\u201d Because she can be educated to determine what her particular, individual, and unique cycle is. For the sake of simplicity, this trait, again using symbols from electricity, is represented by a \u201cnegative sign.\u201d<\/p>\n Are we having fun yet class? So far we\u2019ve learned about a) the \u201calways on,\u201d positively charged \u201clive wire\u201d male and the b) the cyclical, and negatively charged female. But hold on, you\u2019re thinking, who says the female side is predictable? Modern science does. Come on out of the Dark Ages, OK? It\u2019s pretty simple and completely verifiable. You don\u2019t need Mr. Spock\u2019s, or Dr. McCoy\u2019s, tricorder readings to verify this, Star Trek fans. Because for thousands of years, thanks to modern science, this is what we know to be true,<\/a><\/p>\n During each menstrual cycle, one of a woman\u2019s ovaries releases an egg. This process is called ovulation. The egg moves toward the uterus through the fallopian tubes, where fertilization may take place. An unfertilized egg may live for up to 12 hours. The egg will be shed later during the menstrual period if it isn\u2019t fertilized. A woman is most likely to become pregnant if sexual intercourse takes place just before or just after ovulation.<\/em><\/p>\n So, you see? You can put your tricorder and multimeter away, and just leave your thinking cap on. Or you can continue to believe what the modern \u201cmedicate you to infertility\u201d folks are teaching via Madison Avenue, and the public school classrooms. Frankly, what those sources teach is even worse than \u201cyou are a black box that can\u2019t be understood.\u201d<\/p>\n It\u2019s worse because what they teach is \u201cyou are an animal and you can\u2019t be tamed. You can\u2019t control your will, or your appetites. You are a slave, and with these tools, you can embrace your slavery and pleasure yourself into not understanding you are a human being.\u201d Seriously, what would Nietzsche think about your lack of will power? The males then, Nietzsche might say, with their \u201calways on\u201d will-to-power, are taught that they must always be satisfied. Concomitantly, the females are taught that they must always be receptive to the sexual urges of the male. When \u201cpositive\u201d wants to electrify the circuit, \u201cnegative\u201d must be receptive. Isn\u2019t that how it works for Carrie and her pals?<\/p>\n Which brings us to the end of this short class. Something else I learned in basic electricity class (your tax dollars were at work, thank you very much!) is that in order for a circuit to work, and so far that is what I have been describing here, there needs to be what is called a \u201cground.\u201d Just ask the person who works at Radio Shack. You can\u2019t complete a circuit without a \u201cground.\u201d I\u2019ll let the folks at wiseGEEK<\/a><\/em> explain,<\/p>\n
\nDefinition of BLACK BOX<\/em><\/p>\n<\/a><\/div>\n<\/a><\/div>\n<\/a><\/div>\n<\/a><\/div>\n<\/a><\/div>\n