{"id":12606,"date":"2014-07-31T09:58:24","date_gmt":"2014-07-31T13:58:24","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/theamericanjesus.net\/?p=12606"},"modified":"2014-07-31T09:58:24","modified_gmt":"2014-07-31T13:58:24","slug":"is-this-the-worst-novelty-bible-ever-yes-yes-it-is","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/zackhunt\/2014\/07\/is-this-the-worst-novelty-bible-ever-yes-yes-it-is\/","title":{"rendered":"Is This The Worst Novelty Bible Ever? (Yes, Yes It Is)"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

I\u2019m terrible at responding to emails.<\/p>\n

It doesn\u2019t matter who you are or how far we go back, chances are good it\u2019s going to take me forever to get back to you. I know that\u2019s terrible of me, but please know it\u2019s not personal.<\/p>\n

I just have this weird habit of responding to an email in my head, getting distracted by something else, and then I forget to actually respond to the email in real life.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m even worse when it comes to Facebook and Twitter messages. I barely even check them.<\/p>\n

Which is terrible because I sometimes miss out on awesome stuff like this that a friend sent to me a couple of weeks ago.<\/p>\n

And by \u201cawesome\u201d I mean one of the tackiest, most awful things I\u2019ve ever seen.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s called \u201cGod\u2019s Glory\u2122 Bible: A Patriotic King James Version Holy Bible Honoring God And Our Country\u201d and it\u2019s available now for only $39.95<\/a>.<\/p>\n

\"Screen<\/a>I don\u2019t even know where to begin.<\/p>\n

Ok, I do. But I\u2019ve got so many questions about the trademark after God\u2019s Glory. And why the subtitle needed to be so long. And\u2026well, I guess I should just focus on the cover.<\/p>\n

There was\/is an American Patriot\u2019s Bible that came out a while back<\/a> and I thought it was pretty terrible \u2013 because it was \u2013 but this, this has got to be the absolute worst novelty Bible of all time.<\/p>\n

I mean THE COVER IS AN AMERICAN FLAG.<\/p>\n

Oh, and did you notice the stars?<\/p>\n

According to the website,<\/p>\n

This King James Version has 13 stars on the cover \u2013 1 gold star representing Jesus and 12 white stars for the disciples. These stars also represent the 13 original colonies of the United States of America.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

I can\u2019t even.<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I\u2019m terrible at responding to emails. It doesn\u2019t matter who you are or how far we go back, chances are good it\u2019s going to take me forever to get back to you. I know that\u2019s terrible of me, but please know it\u2019s not personal. I just have this weird habit of responding to an email […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3437,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-12606","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\nIs This The Worst Novelty Bible Ever? (Yes, Yes It Is)<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"I'm terrible at responding to emails. 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