We shouldn’t need applause to do good. But what about the ones who are never applauded? The ones who labor in the shadows?
Unseen labor is often essential labor. Just think back to 2020. Oftentimes, those who were considered the most essential workers were not paid very well. As Isabella Backman wrote for the Yale School of Medicine, “In 2020, while stay-at-home orders emptied many offices, in industries deemed “essential,” many employees once again were not afforded the luxury of being able to work safely from their houses. These workers were nearly twice as likely to die of COVID than others in their age group, with those in the lowest income groups at the greatest risk.”
People did say thank you. But we should remember their sacrifice for a moment. I believe that the sacrifices these workers who survived still carry forward today deserves to be seen and recognized. Thank them. Do your best to not make extra work for them – if you can keep things clean yourself, try to do so. Tip well if you can afford it, and please advocate for fair wages when and where you can.
Isn’t that a tragedy? That the people doing the most essential work, oftentimes with low incomes like grocery store workers, were the ones doing the work to ensure we all continued to live. But we have mostly forgotten them in everyday conversations. Today, we hardly see them or recognize them.
Many of these people have never been paid particularly well. Mothers and fathers in particular receive absolutely no pay for their work.
Women labor endlessly, unpaid and unseen. I don’t want to force love and gratitude onto children who are being abused. Expecting a reward for parenting kind of misses the point. But also, mothers and fathers deserve gratitude for their endless labor to upkeep a household. The parents who are cycle breakers, the single parents, and the parents who work hard to always do better, to repair their relationships with their children are especially deserving of care, support, and gratitude.
If you can be there for the young parents in your community, be there. They’re raising the next generation! Ask if they need anything. Tend to the needs of the families around you, as best you can.
Labor can be exhausting. It doesn’t always feel noble. Helping people sounds noble… until they’re grumpy, or difficult to be around. Of course, people can also be cruel, or engage in certain inappropriate behaviors. We aren’t obligated to keep giving of ourselves when they’re behaving as a vampire on our system. We deserve love back, too.
But love isn’t supposed to be glamorous. It’s not one person gazing down at another from a pedestal of self-righteousness.
Genuine compassionate love looks into the eyes of another and sees an equal, a human. There is no pedestal in love – putting the other person on a pedestal is admiration, and putting yourself on a pedestal looking down on the object of your gaze is pride.
Yes, tossing a few dollars into a cup to ensure the homeless can have another bite to eat, matters. But the deeper transformation doesn’t come from simple pity. It comes from connection. It comes from talking to people, asking what they need, and working to help those needs be met. It comes from recognizing and seeing each others humanity.
I would, in fact, recommend the following article:
Backman, I. (2022, November 08). Nurses and Essential Workers: The ‘Sacrifical Lambs’ of US Pandemics in 1918 and 2020. Yale School of Medicine. Nurses and Essential Workers: The “Sacrificial Lambs” of US Pandemics in 1918 and 2020 < Yale School of Medicine
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