One of the most difficult things to explain to someone about how Dianetics and Scientology changes your life is about things that don’t bother you anymore; about irrational thoughts and reactions that you don’t have anymore.
Why are Scientologists so zealous about wanting other people to become Scientologists? Because they have personally experienced these changes and they know within themselves how much more fun life is without negative thoughts and irrational reactions holding them back.
But other people might not have spotted that the person’s non-activity or dislikes were actually sometimes things the person wished he liked, wanted to do, but couldn’t. And why? In my own case, (and from what I know of many others) we didn’t know why. That’s because irrational dislikes and fears stem from the reactive mind.
The reactive mind is that part of the mind which works on a totally stimulus-response basis and is not under a person’s volitional control.
Let me give you a silly example:
I used to accuse my mother of trying to kill me. Really? Why and when? Luckily, you don’t know who my mother is, so I’ll tell you—she is a boring cook. She never really got beyond jello, hamburger helper and Duncan Hines cake mixes. Plus, she learned early to buy in bulk and keep things in a deep freeze.
Which brings me to frozen peas, carrots and other assorted vegetables. Those were a staple at our dinner table. And for whatever reason, when I bit into a partially still-frozen pea I would go ballistic. I know it was a surprise to be eating warm vegetables and suddenly hit a cold spot. Like chewing glass. But still, my dad and the other five children at the table didn’t even comment. They just kept on eating. Didn’t really bother them. Me? I’d freak out.
“Mom, what are you trying to do, kill me?” “Mom, these peas aren’t fully cooked. I can’t eat this. Are you a murderer?”
It was only partly a joke. Such a “rational” reaction to a little bit of ice.
Later, I got pre-emptive, before I took a bite, I’d challenge, “Mom, are these vegetables fully cooked, because you are not going to end my life today, no matter how hard you try.”
Luckily, Mom thought it was funny, obviously since it was so over the top.
Me? I was just reacting. And I didn’t even realize it at the time.
Years later, after being in Scientology and receiving auditing (spiritual counseling), I was at a family dinner, when those same little wrinkled green things were served. (Freeze-dried doesn’t ever rehydrate or look like fresh).
I was enjoying the meal, when my sister looked over at me with a curious glance, then asked, “Nancy, what about the peas? Aren’t you afraid you’re going to die?”
Everybody laughed, and me the most. I’d totally forgotten how crazy I had once been about frozen peas. Totally forgotten because that irrational fear was just gone. And it took effort to even remember how I had once felt about them.
Small example, and an insignificant one, but applies to important things as well, like relationships, learning to drive, taking chances, jumping into new activities in your life.
Your reactive mind can make you act looney. And you can get rid of what causes that – and be a different person. So different you sometimes wonder, “was I ever like that?”
My sister had to remind me that, yes, I really was.
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