Beloved God, Ancient Hunter, Quiet Shaman: The first time you came to me was when I was in college, long before I ever learned who you were. I had a dream in which all people naturally grew antlers, but we all shaved them off. One of my friends–a very spiritual, mildly odd character–left his on, though, and in the dream I admired them and thought that I really should grow out my own. Back then, the only version of you... Read more
When I first started searching for other witches in my area, I went to Meetup.com and subscribed to a bunch of the Pagan groups. One of those groups called itself “The Positive Magickal Community” or something like that. The description on the group’s page was lengthy and terribly written–it was easily 2-3000 words and after struggling through it, I could barely tell what the group did–but I didn’t want to judge a group by whoever was in charge of its Meetup page, so despite... Read more
I’m both a hard and soft polytheist. That is, when I’m not in ritual, I have a hard time believing that the gods are distinct entities–and I don’t feel any particular need to believe it. The gods can be avatars of one presence, they can be archetypes, they can be characters in myth. But when I’m in ritual, I believe in them absolutely. My Younger Self takes over. But I’ve always had a tendency to over-analyze things, and I find... Read more
So I’m a Witch. I’m also a fantasy writer. I’m also a fantasy reader. This poses problems. I don’t think I need to tell you about the enormous overlap between Pagans and fantasy enthusiasts. To some extent, I think it’s a healthy and predictable overlap: we like nature and ceremony and fairies, and fantasy fiction provides them in abundance. But I also think we always run the risk of letting our love of fantasy bleed into nostalgia and wishful thinking.... Read more
In college, my pagan friends and I went on a spirit animal vision quest. If you want a really embarrassing story to tell when you get older, the best way to get it is to gather a bunch of white college kids with no training in meditation and throw some appropriated faux-Native spirituality at them. I don’t remember anything about my own vision quest, mainly because I thought it was dumb and I wasn’t into it, but my husband reminded... Read more
Every so often, I get a little too attached to magic. In Buddhist terms, I cling. When that happens, I get yanked back. I’ll try to describe what happened to me the other night while adhering to the fourth pillar of the Witch’s Pyramid: To Keep Silent. Basically, I’m making a pretty important career move. I’ve worked hard on this for years. I’ve honed my materials. I’ve practiced and practiced and practiced. But this career move is infinitely difficult to... Read more
Okay, I won’t lie, this post’s connection to the letter E is pretty tenuous. A more appropriate title would be “My messy and complicated relationship with my ancestors in the North and South.” I guess there are a few E’s in there. Anyway, I have a funny relationship with the Norse gods and Asatru. On the one hand, I have no interest in becoming a Heathen. I’m quite happy as a Reclaiming Witch and Kohenet wannabe. On the other hand,... Read more
In the beginning, everything was formless, and there was no light. In this formlessness lived the Timtum. But the Timtum began to think about sight, and decided that it would be good to have light to see by. So the Timtum said, “Let’s have some light!” And boom! You know what happened next. The light illuminated the Timtum’s own body, and the the Timtum liked this so much that they decided to create more forms. But a strange thing happened... Read more
I’ve been living with clinical depression and anxiety since I was a child, and I’ve tried over a dozen different medications throughout the years to alleviate it. The only reason I haven’t tried more is that mindfulness meditation has been relatively effective. But it’s not quite enough, so last week I started Wellbutrin. Here’s the funny thing about me and Wellbutrin: I’ve been wanting to try it for years, but have never had the courage to ask for it. Year... Read more
I know the subject of this post is full of Ds, and this is D week in the Pagan Blog Project, but this isn’t my official D post. I want to stick to the biweekly prompts rather than use posts I would have written anyway, because the prompts help me crack open subjects that might not otherwise occur to me. So, devotionals today, and another D post on Friday! One thing that really works about Judaism and Buddhism, and is... Read more
Shekhinah Calling
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