There may not be a more popular thing to say in Christianity than, “God has a plan and purpose for your life.”
As a former pastor, I remember the faces of people who were visiting for the first time. They were always a bit more attentive than the other members. They were a little more hesitant to be demonstrative, but they looked hopeful in a cautious sort of way. This always made me optimistic that they would be a new addition to the fold. They would be the right mix of maturity and hopeful optimism that we needed at this place. I did not want to look at them as prospects, but that was what I did. Most of the energy, especially in small churches, is about surviving, and that means that we always need new members.
Eventually, the newness would wear off, and the individual or family would gain the courage to speak to us honestly, and they would reveal their woundedness. Oddly enough, it was usually from another church or from a family situation that did not go well. Sometimes this would happen internally as a teenager or young adult would gain the courage to ask some tough questions and reveal their struggles and hurts. This always made us a bit uncomfortable, but we also knew they would not see a professional counselor or therapist. So, we did our best to try to help them.
Because we were uncomfortable and we knew they were desperate, we did what religious people often do, and we bypassed the significant issues with religious-sounding quick fixes that did not address the root problems. In our hearts, we knew we were not solving anything, but we hoped God would do something miraculous eventually. We told them we would pray for them, we cared about them, and we understood. But often, we told them something that is a little too common—we told them God had a purpose and a plan for their lives.
It was based on Jeremiah 29:11, where God promised Israel (broadly) that he had plans for them while they were in captivity. Eventually, the Babylonians released them from their bondage, but the passage is not addressed to anyone else even though it has been used and abused by the multitudes to imagine God having a specific plan and purpose for each of us. It gives us temporary comfort, but I now understand it to have some negative repercussions.
If I told one of my children, “I have a plan for you.” Their first question would be, “What is it?” But therein lies the problem. As a pastor for 20 years, I would say the most common issue is that the congregation is still searching for this illusive plan and purpose. They believe they have one (because God gave it to them), but they go to conferences and read books and listen intently every Sunday, hoping they will uncover the details of this plan and purpose. This lostness keeps them in a state of perpetual shame and makes them vulnerable.
Eventually, church members become swept up in the purpose and plan of the pastor and church organization. Subtly, they will come to understand that at least part of their purpose and plan could and should be to:
- Adopt a congruent belief system with the church.
- Attend a good church (This one, since God led you here).
- Give some of your money to the church (at least 10%).
- Get involved and help us reach our plan and purposes (They are ordained by God).
- Do not cause trouble or ask too many questions and help the organization flourish.
- Read your Bible, pray, and attend sanctioned activities.
Even though we told people God had an individual purpose and plan for them, they were eventually swept up into the purpose and plans of the larger group—it even seems noble and sometimes it might be. But don’t we have the right and even the responsibility to find our way? What if we pursued the plans and purposes that we know to be right for us? Because those questions cause us to fear, we often jumped back on the organized religion train instead of pursuing what we thought was right for us—it was just easier and better funded.
I do not believe God has an individual purpose and plan for each of us. That is something we humans devised to bring an immediate sense of comfort even though it bypasses root issues. Exploring what we desire the most and what is most appropriate to pursue takes genuine reflection and deep inner work. I believe it is worth it, and I have seen some fruits of my labor.
Basic principles like love, compassion, and kindness are common and helpful to each of our plans and are OF God: but I am coming to understand a deeper knowing inside each of us that can determine what is the right path for each of us. We know the deep longings of our hearts and what fulfills us deep within. We know the plans we have for ourselves—and they are specific, not general!
I hope you discover your plans and purposes for yourself.
When we quit searching for the elusive God Plan, we can find the real plan and purpose for our lives. Oddly enough, it is where Jesus said the Kingdom of God is—it is inside us!
God’s involvement is more like a question we would ask a child when we have an open schedule:
“What do you want to do today—let’s go do that together!” ~Bob Goff
Be where you are, Be who you are, Be at peace,
Karl Forehand
(an excerpt from our book, Leaning Forward)
See next blog: Barbie’s Revenge
Karl Forehand is a former pastor, podcaster, and award-winning author. His books include Out into the Desert, Leaning Forward, Apparent Faith: What Fatherhood Taught Me About the Father’s Heart, The Tea Shop and Being: A Journey Toward Presence and Authenticity. He is the creator of The Desert Sanctuary podcast and community. He is married to his wife Laura of 35 years and has one dog named Winston. His three children are grown and are beginning to multiply! You can read more about the author here.
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