Husbands Should Not Influence Wives’ Voting

The 19^th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution gave women the right to vote in 1920. After decades of advocacy, civil disobedience, incarceration, marches, and other activities, many women began to exercise this right. Discriminatory voting practices in some states wrongly made it difficult for minority women to vote until years later. Unfortunately, we have witnessed efforts to restrict voting in the twenty-first century.

Some believe that wives who vote differently than their husbands violate the sanctity of marriage.

Jesse Watters’ Interpretation of the Sanctity of Marriage

You may have seen the commercial on TV, narrated by Julia Roberts, in which two women with their Trump-supporting husbands vote for Harris and Waltz in the voting booth’s privacy. The assumption is that their husbands expected their wives to vote for Trump and Vance, but they secretly chose to vote differently.

Jesse Waters and The Vote

I stumbled upon a video of Fox host, Jesse Watters, having a meltdown about this commercial. He said that a wife voting for Harris/Waltz was a deal breaker for a marriage, comparing it to an affair. He would divorce his wife if he found out she had voted this way.

Watters accused the Harris campaign of attacking the sanctity of marriage. If his wife lied about her vote, he questioned what else she kept from him. Another commentator asked why she would need to lie to him. Former House Speaker, Newt Gingrich, also expressed disgust with the ad, produced by VoteCommon, of promoting dishonesty between husband and wife. After the couple vote in this commercial, the husband asks her if she made the “right choice.” She replies, “Sure did, honey.”

Suffragettes Did Not Battle to Give Husbands Two Votes

Women who marched, held hunger strikes, and spent time in jail to advocate for the 19^th Amendment would be horrified by men’s reactions to this commercial. How does a woman use her right to vote if her husband expects her to vote the same way he does? The suffragettes of the eighteenth and nineteenth centuries did not sacrifice the way they did to give husbands two votes.

If a wife needs to lie to her husband about her vote, I sense that her husband feels entitled. He thinks his voting decisions are the “right choice,” as in the commercial. If a woman feels she must lie to her husband to vote the way she prefers, I think the sanctity of their marriage is in jeopardy.

The Sanctity of Marriage and Voting

A woman has a constitutional right to vote privately for the candidates of her choice.

In many Christian wedding vows, in addition to the “in sickness and in health” aspect of the promises, there are the vows to “have and to hold,” and “to love and to cherish.” My vows in the Catholic Church were to “love and honor you all the days of my life.”

Denying one’s wife her constitutional right to vote privately for a candidate of her choice should be illegal. What other consequences would husbands hold over their wives’ heads if they voted differently and do they regularly take away their wives’ freedom to make decisions?

In a healthy marriage, spouses respect and honor each other’s individuality and decision-making. When campaigns’ value systems differ greatly, it may be difficult for a couple to hold radically different views. I know I would struggle if faced with the situation.

The answer is not to force or scare one’s spouse, however, into voting the same way. Dialogue is a healthier approach. My parents never discussed voting with us. I do not know whether they discussed voting privately. If a couple argues about candidates or other issues, perhaps they need to resolve the issue by keeping their thoughts to themselves for harmony’s sake.

Husbands Ruling Over Their Wives is a Result of Sin

The Genesis stories of Creation and the Fall of the first man and woman go from a couple who are partners to the consequences of the Fall which includes husbands ruling over wives.

Genesis 1-3

God’s intent, as shared by the authors of Genesis, was for men and women to have healthy relationships with each other, God, and the natural world. All humans are made in Gods’ image.

So God created humankind in his image,
in the image of God he created them;
male and female he created them.

(Gen. 1:17)

Voting differently than one’s spouse does not violate the sanctity of marriage; husbands who force their spouses to vote one way or the other is a violation.

It is only after Original Sin that men dominate women. This domination does not reflect God’s original intention in Creation. Since both men and women are made in God’s image and likeness, a husband who dictates her vote not only defies the U.S. Constitution but also restricts her unique way of sharing God with the world.

God said to the woman,

“I will greatly increase your pangs in childbearing;
in pain you shall bring forth children,
yet your desire shall be for your husband,
and he shall rule over you.”

(Genesis 3:16)

Marriage Vows

In many Christian wedding vows, in addition to the “in sickness and in health” aspect of the promise, there are the vows to “have and to hold,” and “to love and to cherish.” My vows in the Catholic Church were to “love and honor you all the days of my life.”

Denying one’s spouse their constitutional right to vote privately for a candidate of her choice is wrong. What other consequences would husbands hold over their wives’ heads if they voted contrary to their husbands’ views?

In a healthy marriage, spouses must respect and honor each other’s individuality and agency to allow for disagreements. When campaigns’ value systems differ greatly, it may be difficult for a couple to hold radically different views. I know I would struggle if faced with the situation.

The answer is not to force or scare one’s spouse into voting the same way. Dialogue is a healthier approach. My parents never discussed voting with us. I do not know whether they discussed voting privately. If a couple argues about candidates or other issues, perhaps they need to resolve the issue by keeping their political thoughts to themselves for harmony’s sake.

Women Must Have the Right to Vote Independently

Every person is made in the image and likeness of God. A man and a woman take a marriage vow that includes the promise to love each other. Women have a constitutional right to vote. They do not have to vote according to their husbands’ wishes. (Of course, if there is a threat of domestic violence, women should do what they need to in order to be safe.)

Forcing one’s wife to vote in a certain way suggests that the husband is made in the image and likeness of God, but his wife is in the image and likenss of her husband. Husbands ruling over their wives is the result of sin, not virtue, and contradicts the U.S. Constitution.