By Elizabeth Zagorski
Married couples are varied -- happy, old, new, fat, skinny, arranged, sought, technological, golden, silver, convenient, prohibited, romantic, loving, waiting until the kids are 18, Lutheran, successful, profitable, or destined to end. I know about a hundred married couples, maybe more. I'm only familiar with a handful of same sex marriages. Those marriages are varied too -- happy, earned, deliberate, loving, evocative, provocative, lovely, funny, and not at all convenient nor waiting until the kids are 18. Obviously there are heterosexual marriages that thrive and give and take lots of love. And same sex marriages encounter struggles, conflicts, and changes too. But, among the couples I've known, the happiness of same sex marriages far outweighs the opposite sex marriages. The married gays and lesbians I know derive pleasure from their unity. That's what I want, though I'm not a lesbian. And I'm not a Catholic or a Buddhist or a member of any organized faith.
Pagans believe in the power of nature, the power of love, the power of the soul. Our bodies are beautiful tools that allow us to move about this earth. My body is not my identity -- it is simply that which allows me to be human. Sexuality is physical, but love never is. Marriage is (supposedly) based on love, sweet love, ‘til death do us part, in sickness and in health, in front of Allah, Isis, Moon, God/dess, Aphrodite and/or all these witnesses. So, with this love we marry, yet with our bodies we sign the certificate and consecrate the marriage. Who cares what's underneath the clothes? Quite frankly, it's none of your business unless you're my doctor, wife, lover, husband or coroner.
The human body is ridiculously delightful. My body enables me to tingle with excitement, writhe in pain, and get an ice cream headache. My soul is who I really Am, so it is the soul who delights in vanilla turtle ice cream headaches; my soul flourishes with the love of my new lover; my soul lets me know the painful path as it delays growth. This is also what your body does! It doesn't care about your religion, if you even have one! Your body looks exactly like mine underneath - circulatory system, nervous system, digestive tract, reproductive organs. Aha! Is this the rub? Reproduction, procreation, propagation, proliferation!
A view like this suggests that reproducing is our sole purpose. Those that try to use the argument of marriage of man and woman for the proliferation of the human race are most likely hypocrites. Unfortunately, religion often propagates hypocrites with its propaganda. Our Creator has created us for multiple reasons, not just to procreate more physical humans. The Creator creates us to grow, to love, to flourish! And, s/he/it doesn't make mistakes. Plenty of people are childless, although some folks go into debt, end marriages, end lives, all in vain to be a mother/father in the most basic of senses. Marriage is a proclamation of a devoted couple, regardless of the combination of womyn and men. Marriage is an expression of the souls' need to tell the physical world what the spiritual world already knows: Our Love is Divine.
Marriage is regarded as the absolute expression of love by our government, and in most religions. If a couple wants to be afforded legal rights to health care, social security benefits, medical power of attorney, and innumerable key decisions, then they must marry to have such legal rights. Our laws recognize the contract of marriage, not the love. It is necessary that our governing bodies realize that it's not the human bodies marrying, it's the human beings.
Is there any better contribution to each other and to the Universe than Love? How could there be? Love is the ultimate intimate manifestation. Think about the King of Kings, the Queen of the Universe, the One, the Only, the Nameless, and let us agree on something. Our creator, whomever s/he/it is, created us out of Love, to know Love, to be Love. If this is the case - and I dare you to prove otherwise -- then love is Love.
Elizabeth Zagorski is a 1993 graduate of Youngstown State University with a B.A. in Religious Studies. She is currently pursuing a career in teaching with a focus in middle childhood education.
7/7/2009 4:00:00 AM